Scenes from a Marriage (TV Mini Series)

Analfabeterna (1973)

Liv Ullmann: Marianne

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Quotes 

• Johan : I guess I'll have to speak to our daughter. The problem is, we don't communicate. When she comes to visit, she just reads comic books or sprawls in the best easy chair and watches TV. She talks in monosyllables as if she was a moron. Paula can't get a word out of her. The only thing that elicits a response is money or a ticket to the movies. But she'll chat for hours on the phone with her friends. I don't feel much paternal affection.

  Marianne : You sound ridiculous when you talk about the children that way. Ridiculous and childish.

  Johan : Well, I'm not amused. I accidentally brought them into the world, and I've paid a small fortune to raise them. I've reached my limit. I refuse to play at being father. I reserve the right to dislike them as much as they dislike me.

• Johan : Why are you silent? Are you mad?

  Marianne : I was just thinking.

  Johan : Thinking?

  Marianne : You used to be different. Your attitude towards the girls, I mean. Do you remember? You were so pleased when my stomach grew big, and so eager for Eva to have a baby brother or sister. Do you remember how involved you were? How you helped me care for them? We did everything together. The nanny Mother hired finally gave notice out of sheer desperation. You spent all your time with the girls. You read to them and played with them. You were so gentle and patient. Much more patient than I was. Do you remember how worried you were over every little illness? You dealt with them better than I did. And they loved you. You remember our Saturday nights together? What happened? Where did we go wrong? When did the children grow indifferent towards you? When did you grow indifferent towards them? Where did all that love go? And all that joy.

• Johan : No use crying over spilt milk. Children grow up, relationships are broken off, love runs out. And so does affection, friendship and closeness. That's the way it is.

  Marianne : You and I were born with silver spoons in our mouths. We've squandered our resources, leaving us poor, bitter and angry.

  Johan : However trite, it's the truth. We're emotional illiterates. We've been taught about anatomy and farming methods in Africa. We've learned mathematical formulas by heart. But we haven't been taught a thing about our souls. We're tremendously ignorant about what makes people tick. That signals the end of my lecture. I had nothing more to say anyway.

• Marianne : Johan, be honest now. Look at me! You've changed your mind. You don't want a divorce, do you? You were going to tell me today, right?

  Johan : Would that be such a crime? You want to hear me admit that I give up? Well, I do! I'm sick of Paula! I want to come home! Don't look at me like that. I'm a failure. I'm going downhill. I'm scared and I have no home. This isn't the right time to ask you to resume our marriage.

  Marianne : If you think pity will help...

  Johan : You asked me, and I'm giving you a straight answer.

• Marianne : Let's be sensible.

  Johan : So you weren't being sensible?

  Marianne : No, it wasn't sensible, but it was wise and reasonable, which you should comprehend.

  Johan : I'm trying my best to comprehend.

  Marianne : If I may say something sensible and reasonable, you should be glad I've finally been able to break free, that I want to live my own life. You should follow my example. Free yourself from the past, and then make a fresh start on different terms. This moment is your opportunity.

  Johan : I'd like you to answer a question.

  Marianne : Now you sound all pathetic again.

  Johan : What's the point? Why make a fresh start? I have no such desire.

  Marianne : What do you mean?

  Johan : I've told you this several times now, but you just won't listen. I don't want to start over. I have no curiosity about what lies ahead.

  Marianne : That's your depression talking. You're looking for sympathy.

  Johan : You hit the nail on the head.

• Marianne : Perhaps one day we'll be very good friends, and in time we'll learn to know each other as we really are, without those horrible...

  Johan : Horrible what?

  Marianne : Those horrible masks.

• Marianne : If only we could meet as the people we were meant to be, and not as people trying to play the parts others have assigned us.

  Johan : That's impossible. We start putting on those masks as infants. No one ever really finds themselves.

  Marianne : That's not true. I live a much more honest life now than I ever did.

  Johan : And happier?

  Marianne : All that talk about happiness is nonsense. Happiness for me is enjoying a good meal.

• Johan : I'm tired of being alone.

  Marianne : Alone?

  Johan : Loneliness with Paula is worse than being all alone. I can't stand either.

• Marianne : It's funny.

  Johan : What's funny?

  Marianne : I wanted to have sex with you today to see if I felt anything. All I felt was lukewarm affection. You know what? I think I'm breaking free at last. It's taken a long time and it's been very painful, but I'm free of you now to start living my own life, and that feels absolutely wonderful.

  Johan : Allow me to congratulate you.

  Marianne : I don't know why I told you. It's callous of me to say it when you're having such a rough time. But oddly enough, I don't care.

• Johan : Couldn't we give it a try?

  Marianne : Have you forgotten how I begged you to come back? Have you forgotten how I groveled and wept and pleaded? I even turned to religion for a while and prayed to get you back. Have you forgotten the occasions we met, and all your half-truths and evasions that merely showed your complete indifference to me?

  Johan : I didn't know any better back then. You can't reproach me for that now.

  Marianne : Reproach? Now, there's a fantastic word.

• Johan : There is such a thing as simple affection. To say nothing of sensuousness. And physical desire. In your case, that's all blocked.

  Marianne : Do you really think I wasn't miserable too? I'd think, "Is this how it's supposed to be?" We'd console ourselves with the thought that sex wasn't everything, that in other respects we were happy. Talk about deluding ourselves.

• Johan : If I understand you correctly, you'd prefer to see the divorce through.

  Marianne : That's exactly how I'd like to sum up what I've already said.

• Johan : You're being utterly grotesque!

  Marianne : So what? That's what I've become! The difference between your grotesqueness and mine is that I won't give in! I intend to face reality the way it is. If there's one thing I truly appreciate, it's being alive. I enjoy overcoming difficulties. I don't ask for any favors...

  Johan : Great! Then we don't have to feel sorry for each other. We can chuck our guilt out the window. We're almost human.

• Marianne : I wonder how it would turn out.

  Johan : I know it would be better than ever. We would be more earnest. Don't you think so? Don't you think so, Marianne?

  Marianne : After a week or so, we'd slip back into our old patterns. The same old complaints, the same old aggression. All our good intentions would be forgotten. We wouldn't have learned a thing. Everything would be the same or worse. It would be a mistake.

  Johan : How can you be so sure?

  Marianne : How many times do I have to repeat that all I feel for you is simple pity?

• Marianne : It's hard.

  Johan : What's hard?

  Marianne : Getting divorced.

  Johan : It's just paperwork.

  Marianne : I still think it's hard. We've been living apart for ages, we rarely see each other, we've both agreed to it, but I still feel guilty. It's strange. Johan, it's strange.

  Johan : So it is.

• Marianne : You know what I think? I think you are foolishly naïve. Do you think I've made it this far, started a new life, for which I'm thankful every day, only to ditch it and save you from your pitiful self? If I didn't think you were so deplorable, I'd laugh at you. When I think of how you've treated me, I feel sick with fury! Go on, glare as much as you like. I'm immune to it. If you only knew how many times I've dreamed that I've killed you, stabbed you, murdered you, beaten you to death. If you only knew what a goddamn relief it is to finally say this to your face.