Six Times Ingrid
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Porn apparently aimed at the blind folks
I had watched this low-quality porn film on a Something Weird DVD several years back and it registered ho-hum response, but looking at it again I notice its truly awful nature. Not mediocre as I had superficially assumed, but outright horrible.
It's as if the influence of itinerant West Coast pornographer Nick Millard/Nick Phillips had somehow extended to the outside world, and a fellow specialist in smut had tried to copy the master (of MOS filming, dumb femme narration track, and one-note mainly soft-core eroticism). The result of this made-in-NYC project is terrible to behold.
Resembling several of Nick's least interesting projects (travelogues or strange woman in a strange land junk like "Dr. Christina of Sweden"), picture consists of a couple of boring days in the life of title tourist Ingrid, who Meryl Streep-like narrates the silent film with a thick, quirky Germanic accent. Fortunately the Something Weird artifact is incomplete (it ends abruptly) so only 45 minutes of tedium remain.
She turns out to be an exhibitionist, so we see her riding around Manhattan in a convertible, either nude or partially clad, masturbating, peeling a banana and rubbing it against her pussy. Later she walks along the Brooklyn Bridge, lays out a blanket and lies there nude. She heads to the Wonder Wheel at a Brooklyn amusement park and is briefly nude on the ride, high in the air.
The cameraman for this drek is obsessed with Ingrid's crotch, and presumably customers at Adult Cinemas in the '70s were expected to be satisfied by her beaver shots in lieu of watching a real movie. Adding insult to injury, the narration here is actually worse than Millard's famously low standard - we hear Ingrid remarking several times "Oh what a lovely chair", presumably to fill in dead air the way current filmmakers mouth off inane pleasantries to fill the track of those dreaded Commentaries included on most new DVD releases.
I recall as a youngster watching on TV (they also had them in theaters back in the '50s &' '60s) silent travelogues, with the explorer narrating live in the studio, not unlike a home movie (in Cleveland the show was called Jim Doney's Adventure Road). Little did I suspect that cheap and untalented pornographers would some day be carrying on the tradition.
It's as if the influence of itinerant West Coast pornographer Nick Millard/Nick Phillips had somehow extended to the outside world, and a fellow specialist in smut had tried to copy the master (of MOS filming, dumb femme narration track, and one-note mainly soft-core eroticism). The result of this made-in-NYC project is terrible to behold.
Resembling several of Nick's least interesting projects (travelogues or strange woman in a strange land junk like "Dr. Christina of Sweden"), picture consists of a couple of boring days in the life of title tourist Ingrid, who Meryl Streep-like narrates the silent film with a thick, quirky Germanic accent. Fortunately the Something Weird artifact is incomplete (it ends abruptly) so only 45 minutes of tedium remain.
She turns out to be an exhibitionist, so we see her riding around Manhattan in a convertible, either nude or partially clad, masturbating, peeling a banana and rubbing it against her pussy. Later she walks along the Brooklyn Bridge, lays out a blanket and lies there nude. She heads to the Wonder Wheel at a Brooklyn amusement park and is briefly nude on the ride, high in the air.
The cameraman for this drek is obsessed with Ingrid's crotch, and presumably customers at Adult Cinemas in the '70s were expected to be satisfied by her beaver shots in lieu of watching a real movie. Adding insult to injury, the narration here is actually worse than Millard's famously low standard - we hear Ingrid remarking several times "Oh what a lovely chair", presumably to fill in dead air the way current filmmakers mouth off inane pleasantries to fill the track of those dreaded Commentaries included on most new DVD releases.
I recall as a youngster watching on TV (they also had them in theaters back in the '50s &' '60s) silent travelogues, with the explorer narrating live in the studio, not unlike a home movie (in Cleveland the show was called Jim Doney's Adventure Road). Little did I suspect that cheap and untalented pornographers would some day be carrying on the tradition.
helpful•10
- lor_
- Feb 5, 2015
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