Community (TV Series)
Alternative History of the German Invasion (2013)
Yvette Nicole Brown: Shirley Bennett
Photos
Quotes
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Jeff Winger : I really am Hitler.
Shirley Bennett : Yeah.
Pierce Hawthorne : So it's just decided? No vote or anything.
Troy Barnes : I hate this. I wish there was a way that we could make it up to people.
Jeff Winger : That's it! We need to make reparations. We have to start giving back, because Greendale has given us so much. It gave us the study room. And that study room is our home. But our home is more than those four walls. And our family is more than the seven of us. It's all of Greendale. And everyone deserves to have what we have.
[after they finished the study room makeovers]
Jeff Winger : What do you know? Greendale just got slightly better.
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Annie Edison : Jeff, it's just a little table in the corner of the room. Why don't we just let them have it?
Jeff Winger : Because that's called appeasement. And everyone knows if you give the Germans something small, like the study room or Austria, they end up wanting something big, like Earth.
Pierce Hawthorne : Jeff's right. If there were more people in the world like Annie, we'd all be speaking Vietnamese right now.
[Annie gasps in shock]
Pierce Hawthorne : That was my war. I had flashbacks for years.
Shirley Bennett : Pierce, you moved to Canada.
Pierce Hawthorne : And it was hell. Those people call ham "bacon".
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Dean Pelton : Greendale's a forgiving place.
Annie Edison : It really is.
Dean Pelton : Please keep that in mind the next 20 seconds. Remember that people can "Chang".
Jeff Winger : [This phrasing causes concern] People can what?
Ben Chang : [Enters] Hi, I'm Kevin.
Jeff Winger , Annie Edison , Abed Nadir , Shirley Bennett , Britta Perry , Troy Barnes , Pierce Hawthorne : [All screaming] AHHHHHH!
Dean Pelton : He has Changnesia.
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Professor Cornwallis : [enters lunch room where study group is sitting at a booth] Ah! There you people are. I believe we have something to discuss.
Jeff Winger : Oh, my God. You clever British bastard. You set this whole thing up to teach us a lesson.
Professor Cornwallis : What?
Jeff Winger : Making the school pretend to hate us, to show us that one man's hero is another man's villain. Of course! We aren't Nazis.
[group laughter]
Jeff Winger : I tip my cap to you, sir. Lesson learned.
Professor Cornwallis : Are you actually suggesting that a Professor at Greendale would set up an elaborate ruse just to teach seven students a lesson?
Jeff Winger , Annie Edison , Troy Barnes , Abed Nadir , Shirley Bennett , Britta Perry , Pierce Hawthorne : [overlapping acknowledgement] Uh, yes. Yeah. Yes. That's a Wednesday.
Professor Cornwallis : Oh, my God. I've made a terrible mistake coming here.
Annie Edison : So this wasn't part of the class? Then why are you here?
Professor Cornwallis : Because you had a test today, and you all missed it! *Fs* for everyone!
Shirley Bennett : Oh.
Professor Cornwallis : Maybe it's not too late to get out of my contract.
[exits]
