- Mr. Fischoeder: If there's one thing I learned from that week I was married, it's when to walk away.
- Linda Belcher: You kids are supposed to be upstairs.
- Louise: Well, there is no room for a casino upstairs.
- Dr. Eigerman: [to Bob and Linda] Hey, how's it going? I'm Dr. Eigerman.
- Linda Belcher: Look at that face! So young! I want to breastfeed that face!
- Dr. Eigerman: [after Bob and Linda return to the hospital after Bob's stitches burst] Hey, it's you guys.
- Bob: Are there any other doctors here?
- Dr. Eigerman: I can't tell you that. It's doctor-doctor confidentiality.
- Bob: There's no such thing.
- Dr. Eigerman: I can't talk about it, but there is.
- Bob: No, there's not.
- Louise: Ugh, I don't want to make cards. I want to make money! I say we go down there, and we open up for business.
- Gene: Yeah.
- Tina: But Mom and Dad will be home in an hour. Maybe we could play pretend restaurant? I'm restocking the napkin dispenser. Gene, you go clean the floors.
- Gene: If we're pretending, I'll make fresh mozzarella.
- Louise: We're not making money in this fake restaurant, Tina!
- Tina: Not yet, but we're building good pretend word of mouth.
- Linda Belcher: What are you doing with Mommy's crackers?
- Tina: Got to keep the players happy. Flirt a little, wink a little.
- Mr. Fischoeder: Sorry to interrupt, Belcher family, but, um, there seems to be a certain unresolved matter of my $5,000.
- Bob: Mr. Fischoeder, you can't expect me to pay you. I mean, they're just kids playing pretend casino. Why can't you play like normal kids?
- Louise: Why can't you bleed like a normal dad?
- Louise: Dad, I can't beat him, but you can with that.
- [referring to Bob's hand]
- Bob: This... why would I play him with this? My hand's stitched. Plus, I'm not even left-handed.
- Louise: Exactly. If you use that hand, he'll think you can't throw scissors and that's why you're gonna throw scissors.
- Bob: But I really can't. My fingers won't separate.
- Louise: Yeah, keep saying that. We need him to think you think that.
- Bob: No, Louise, I can't actually do it.
- Louise: Great, so you know what you have to do.
- Bob: Oh, my God.
- Linda Belcher: That's my girl. That's my little mind-gamer. My little "Amarosa."