The Simpsons (TV Series)

The War of Art (2014)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson

Quotes 

• Lisa Simpson : I can't believe I'm really going! My first trip to providence.

  Homer Simpson : Yeah, yeah. Just remember, if your mother asks, I took you to a wine tasting.

  Lisa Simpson : That's a terrible thing for a father to do.

  Homer Simpson : That's why she'll believe it.

• Homer Simpson : Here's what makes great art: one, nudity; two, holograms; three, horrible things happening to Jesus.

• Homer Simpson : To me, it looks like garbage salad. But that's the great thing about art. Everyone can have their own opinion on why it sucks.

• Homer Simpson : We could have what these people have, a financial cushion. No more living paycheck to paycheck, always one lost retainer away from the gutter.

  Marge Simpson : I could write a check with today's date on it.

  Homer Simpson : That's the cushion.

• Homer Simpson : That was real cold, Luanne! Real cold! Brr! Sarcastic brr!

• Marge Simpson : How about this, what if we give the Van Houten's 25% of the money.

  Homer Simpson : Then they'll just be mad about the 65% that we're keeping.

• Lisa Simpson : [Her guinea pig goes into a mousehole]  He's in the walls. I hear chewing.

  Bart Simpson : No, that's a much larger animal.

  Homer Simpson : [In the kitchen on the other side of the wall]  Kettlecorn: the heroin of the farmer's market.

• Guinea Pig Sanctuary Worker : You're doing the right thing adopting a rescue pig. You know, most of these guys are rejects from the big guinea pig mills in the Midwest. Oh, I can't tell you how many mill pigs we get in here who have bumblefoot or the slobbers.

  Homer Simpson : You don't have children, do you?