I had to explain to friends today why this episode had me so pre-occupied and why anyone who used to watch Walker and fell off should come back.
The series deserves a second look, even a double watch like I did to get the details down.
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First watch: this is wildly entertaining TV with beautiful videography and a sense of place/family/time. The music absolutely rocks.
Last night's episode had it all--characters we love, heartfelt moments, humor, plus a suspenseful case.
There were no holes or anything to criticize, which for me is unusual. I can usually find some thread to pick or some opinion to spout, since that's what imdb viewer reviews are here for.
But as they say 10/10 no notes to actors, crew, or writers.
Perfection on all.
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Second watch:
Why it preoccupies me even after enjoying the basic story explains why Walker is a favorite of mine.
There's a bright line through the series of how to deal with mental health. How we sometimes judge ourselves against "coming through" for others at work and in life instead of being gentle with personal needs.
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Last night it was how they dealt with "fine." That people can be carrying loads that may be partially or wholly invisible and they've been trained by society to always say they are "fine."
Even those closest to Cordell, who suspect he isn't "fine," still accept that comfort for themselves instead of finding a way to solve his problem. "Fine" is the stopping point instead of a beginning.
Abilene, one of my favorite characters, leads with judgment about what Cordell "should" be doing, which isn't the pure support he needs to be comfortable enough to accept help.
Liam does the same, approaching from an angle of what he'd had to do to cover for Cordell before.
They are both right and yet very wrong in their toxic "tough love."
It reminds me, unfortunately, of how we deal in real life with situations of grieving or illness, where there's no societal framework for long term needs or that people may fall back after being re-triggered.
Our jobs and careers expect colleagues to pick up the slack, which is juggling a short term solution.
So we actively seek the answer "fine," even if we're well meaning. We want to help, but don't take the time to put our own selves aside and sit there for hours in the silence with the person who's hurting. Both they and we accept the social convention that after a short period, the task is just to "suck it up."
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I'm not sure what the answer is and will be interested in how the writers handle this. Cordell is both to "blame" for not opening up when his family approaches, but also absolutely and completely "innocent" because they aren't approaching in a way that he needs.
It's no wonder he feels not only empty nesting but also completely isolated emotionally. No one listened on his small requests, why should he even try to reach out for more?
Cordell's obsession with the Jackal is a reaction to real triggers--what he went through himself in that horrific experience (with Larry) and during the "era" of Emily's death. All the failures he piled on himself, some justified, many not.
There are so many accurate mental health details here as I re-watched, right down to a slight ringing buzz in the audio when Cordell is feeling the stress of ptsd.
Maybe I should watch a third time.
This episode is a thinker and deserves the time (as does anyone feeling the stress of issues in mental health.)