How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)

Platonish (2013)

Neil Patrick Harris: Barney Stinson

Photos 

Quotes 

• The Mother : Do you want to keep playing or do you wanna win?

  Barney Stinson : I wanna win. What am I doing? In less than 20 minutes, Robin and I could be...

  The Mother : Oh, no, no, no, no. It's gonna take a lot more than 20 minutes. This is gonna take everything you have got. It will take all your time, all your attention, all your resources. This is the big one, diaper man! You gotta do it right, can't be messing around and picking up girls in drug stores. You got work to do.

• Barney Stinson : [Barney has been challenge to pick up a girl without using the letter "E". He walks up to a girl]  Hey. Damn it!

  [He walks to another girl] 

  Barney Stinson : Hi. I... am... Barney. Damn it! There's an E in my name!

  [He walks to another girl] 

  Barney Stinson : Hi. My word for... this guy is Barn... o. Barno. You look... not ugly.

  [He motions to his phone] 

  Barney Stinson : Your... dial thing... is what?

  Madeline : Do you want to just go back to my place?

  Barney Stinson : Yes. Damn it!

  [He walks to another girl] 

  Barney Stinson : I want to buy you a drink. But first, what do I call you?

  Elaine Edelstein : Elaine Edelstein.

  Barney Stinson : How about I just call you... tomorrow?

  [He hands her his phone] 

  Barney Stinson : Your digits, m'lady?

  [Cut to the apartment. Barney walks in triumphantly] 

  Barney Stinson : Seriously, guys, you're gonna have to try harder than that.

• Barney Stinson : Sad? Lady, I got 14 girls' numbers in the last hour, and this was an off-night. What could I possibly be sad about?

  The Mother : I think you were in love and you messed it up. And every moment of your life since then has been spent trying to stay busy enough to ignore that fact.

  Narrator : And that's how Barney met your mother.

• Barney Stinson : I'm recruiting volunteers for the starving puppy orphanage where I work... for free. So if you wouldn't mind just writing your number down on this signup sheet.

  The Mother : [He hands her a pen and holds out his empty palm]  Listen, I appreciate that you feel like you need my number. Um, maybe it's because you're really sad about something, and this is your way of feeling better about yourself. But, since I have a boyfriend, and I'm pretty sure I heard you call me a target earlier over there, I'm gonna go ahead and not give you my number. I'm gonna give you something even better.

  Barney Stinson : [Not following]  Whoa, right to the chase. Meet you in Aisle 6.

  The Mother : I'm gonna give you this.

  [She grabs his arms and looks at him directly in the eyes] 

  The Mother : It's gonna be okay. You're a good guy. You will get through this.

• Lily Aldrin : Congratulations! You win.

  Barney Stinson : Win? No, I don't wanna win. I wanna keep playing.