Last Tango in Halifax (TV Series)

Episode #2.1 (2013)

Derek Jacobi: Alan

Quotes 

• Celia : I've got my new hat, so that's that bit covered. Something old, something new.

  Alan : Well, summat old we've not got.

  Celia : Well, we're both old.

  Alan : Are we?

  Celia : Well, you are, I'm not.

  [Alan laughs] 

  Celia : I started counting backwards when I got to 36.

  Alan : So, how old does that make you now, then?

  Celia : Hmm. Minus three?

  Alan : [laughing]  Fancy!

• Celia : What's up?

  Alan : [sighing]  It's just a disappointment, isn't it? An ongoing disappointment.

  Gillian : And for the record, he is not my brother-in-law, because A, you're not married yet and two, him and Caroline are getting divorced. Ipso facto, Q.E.D., not my brother-in-law.

  Celia : I said not to say anything.

  Alan : Aye, well I did.

  Gillian : Can we all just get it into our little heads that I regret it and it won't happen again? Would you like that written down? In triplicate?

  Alan : What for? Wouldn't mean owt.

  Gillian : Dad, I'm going to get upset.

  Alan : Well, what did you expect?

  [to Celia] 

  Alan : She were pregnant when she were fifteen.

  Gillian : Dad...

  Alan : Broke Eileen's heart. Perhaps you didn't know that.