Mom (TV Series)

Hot Soup and Shingles (2014)

Anna Faris: Christy Plunkett

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bonnie : You can forget about patching the roof. You can't climb up there.

  Christy : If I don't do it, who's going to? Are YOU gonna do it?

  Bonnie : What about your ex-husband, Baxter?

  Christy : Baxter? You want my stoner ex-husband to climb up on the roof with hot tar and a nail gun? Can you explain how this is *not* going to end with somebody in tears?

• Bonnie : What're you doing down there?

  Christy : [crawls in front door]  I fell, and I hurt my ankle.

  Bonnie : Well why didn't you call for help?

  Christy : I did, I threw fruit.

  Bonnie : Well we should get you to the emergency room or something.

  Christy : No, it's not that bad.

  Bonnie : Let me see.

  [grabs her foot] 

  Christy : [falls to the floor in pain]  Wrong leg-wrong leg-wrong leg!

• Bonnie : [about the leaky roof]  What're you gonna do about this?

  Christy : I called the landlord over and over... his English got worse each time. If I knew where the hole was I'd... shove a tampon in it.

  Bonnie : Oh great, then the house could do archery and ride horses.

• Bonnie : What're you doing back so early?

  Christy : Gabriel sent me home.

  Bonnie : He didn't fire you, did he?

  Christy : No, one perk to having slept with your married boss is job security.

• Christy : I'm just so tired.

  Bonnie : [tucking her in]  That's because you don't let anybody help you.

  Christy : I would, but then things don't get done right, before you know it, everything's falling apart. Stop tucking, I'm not a burrito!

  Bonnie : Sorry.

  Christy : And you don't know how to fluff a pillow.

  Bonnie : Go fluff yourself.

  [heads to the door] 

  Christy : Sure, abandon me, that's how this all started.

  Bonnie : Come again?

  Christy : Forget it.

  Bonnie : No, you seriously think I'm the reason you're a control freak?

  Christy : You seriously don't?

  Bonnie : Here we go! Welcome back to another exciting episode of Blaming Bonnie!

  Christy : As far back as I can remember, I came home every night to an empty house.

  Bonnie : Eh, seen this one.

  Christy : If I didn't cook, I didn't eat.

  Bonnie : At least the fridge was filled with food.

  Christy : Don't you dare defend yourself!

  Bonnie : But I provid...

  Christy : Nononono! No! This is not a conversation! Do I have to remind you that I raised myself? I did my own laundry, I made my own lunches, I hitchhiked to school.

  Bonnie : What's that go to do with you being a bitter, angry, resentful woman right now?

  Christy : [pause]  I said this is NOT a conversation!

  Bonnie : Do you honestly believe you have to remind me how much I screwed up? Don't you think I carry that around every minute of every fricking day?

  Christy : Do you?

  Bonnie : The actual amount of time is not important. All you need to know is I'm trying to be here for you right now, and you can stop beating me up for who I used to be because I got that covered.

  Christy : [meekly]  But I like beating you up.

  Bonnie : How's this for a plan? You can blame me for all your problems on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Sundays, I'll punish myself the rest of the week.

  Christy : Well it is Monday.

  Bonnie : All right. I was a terrible mother, and I let you down, and nobody hates me more than me. How's that?

  Christy : Would've been better if you cried.

  Bonnie : I'll work on it. I'm so sorry, baby.

  [hugs Christy]