Brad Jones: Cinema Snob

Quotes 

• Cinema Snob : [while watching a really lame sex scene in Black Love]  This, by the way, is every deleted scene from Lars Von Trier's Nymphomaniac. If you haven't heard my, or anyone else's review of Nymphomaniac, let me sum it up for you.

  [* tilts to one side and farts loudly *] 

• Cinema Snob : I'm sure this movie tackles the subject of black love with plenty of dignity and- John Q. Black? What the fuck? Even Trump Turner would say that name is bullshit!

• Cinema Snob : This film was commissioned by Chicago businessman Robert L. Smith, who hired H. G. Lewis to direct, to which Lewis used Smith's name as a pseudonym. As if to say, "Yes, I'll direct your sex flick, but I'm blaming this bullshit on you!"

• Cinema Snob : [In response to Black Love's first scene]  I'm really nervous about a sex documentary that opens in a playground.

• Cinema Snob : Yes, it gets more weird.

• Cinema Snob : We now return to the worst After School Special ever!

• Cinema Snob : [In response to a nude scene in Black Love]  It's a little hard for me to take this seriously when I can see that he's trying not to laugh!

• Cinema Snob : [Upon seeing the film switch to a blue/ grey set]  I can see they've switched their location to the inside of a glacier.

• Cinema Snob : [In response to the film's narrative]  You can use all the big words you want, but it's obvious you think your audience is stupid.