- [Sheldon and Amy are Skyping]
- Sheldon Cooper: I've been thinking a lot about relationships and how difficult they can be, and I think...
- Amy Farrah Fowler: I've been thinking about them, too, Sheldon. Being your girlfriend is so challenging. Emotionally, physically. I've been incredibly patient for years.
- Sheldon Cooper: Strongly disagree. Go on.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Okay, well... this isn't easy to say, because I love you, but... I need some time to take a step back and reevaluate our situation.
- Sheldon Cooper: Oh.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: I hope you understand.
- Sheldon Cooper: Okay.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Bye, Sheldon.
- [Skype session ends and Sheldon looks at a statue of Gollum]
- Sheldon Cooper: Well, Gollum, you're an expert on rings.
- [Sheldon takes out an engagement ring from his desk drawer]
- Sheldon Cooper: What do I do with this one?
- Sheldon Cooper: Amy's mad at me and I'm not sure why.
- Penny: Okay, were you talking before she got mad?
- Sheldon Cooper: Yes.
- Penny: Well, that's probably it.
- Penny: Wait, what is wrong with you two? He was talking about television during their date night.
- Sheldon Cooper: Oh, not just date night. Our 5th anniversary.
- Penny: Okay, see, that's even dumber than you wondering if being bitten by a goat would give you the powers of a goat.
- Sheldon Cooper: If that happens, don't make me wait ten years to watch you eat a tin can.
- Penny: Hey, I don't think she's wrong about you going too slow in the relationship.
- Sheldon Cooper: Too slow?
- Penny: Yeah, you've been going out for years. You haven't even slept together.
- Sheldon Cooper: That's right. It's called foreplay.
- Penny: Still haven't heard from her?
- Sheldon Cooper: No, and I'm confused. It's been nearly 24 hours. Amy should have figured out she's wrong by now.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Maybe it's time we tell him he needs to move out.
- Howard Wolowitz: We should have done it months ago.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: I know, but his store was reopening, and then there were the holidays, and then he was sick.
- Howard Wolowitz: Yeah, right, sick. He didn't have jaundice. He just looks like that.
- Howard Wolowitz: When he comes home, I'm dropping the hammer.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Ooh, I like when you take charge.
- Howard Wolowitz: Oh, I'm not taking charge. You're the hammer.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Can you believe it's been five years since our first date?
- Sheldon Cooper: I know. Do you think I should start watching The Flash TV show?
- Amy Farrah Fowler: That's what you're thinking about?
- Sheldon Cooper: Well, one of the things.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Are any of them me?
- Sheldon Cooper: Yes. I thought, I can't decide if I should watch The Flash TV show. I know, I'll ask Amy. Anyway.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: What are you doing?
- Sheldon Cooper: You're right, you did kind of kill the mood.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: I didn't kill anything. You did, talking about your stupid TV show.
- Sheldon Cooper: Excuse me. Starting to watch a television show that might run for years isn't a decision to take lightly. I'm wrestling with a big commitment issue here.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Really? That's the commitment issue you're wrestling with? Sheldon, do you understand the irony of your fixation on a man with super speed, while after five years all I can get out of you is a distracted make-out session on a couch?
- Sheldon Cooper: Irony's not really my strong suit. But I have been getting better with sarcasm, if you want to give that a try.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: [sarcastically] Oh, sure, I'd love to.
- Sheldon Cooper: Whenever you're ready.
- Sheldon Cooper: What happened?
- Penny: Your little buddy got mugged by a bunch of baby farm animals.
- Sheldon Cooper: Been there.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Did you eat all my yogurt?
- Howard Wolowitz: You mean the one that lets ladies do the thing ladies pretend they don't do even though they do?
- Raj Koothrappali: You've been complaining about Stuart living here for the past year. I don't see you showing him the door.
- Howard Wolowitz: It's not the same thing. Emily's a person. Stuart's more like an infestation. Something you spray for.
- Raj Koothrappali: Look, I care about you a lot, but we are very different people.
- Emily Sweeney: Are you breaking up with me?
- Raj Koothrappali: No, no, I'm just pointing out that you're dark on the inside and I'm dark on the outside.
- Sheldon Cooper: But I have been getting better with sarcasm, if you want to give that a try.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: [sarcastic] Oh, sure, I'd love to.
- Sheldon Cooper: Whenever you're ready.
- Leonard Hofstadter: That was really intense.
- Penny: Well, now we know, next time we go to the farmers' market, the order is petting zoo first, then buy vegetables.
- Leonard Hofstadter: I'm going to guess that your main concern is the time commitment of watching an entire season of a new show.
- Sheldon Cooper: Oh, no, not just a season. If I'm in, I'm in for the whole run, even if the quality declines.
- Leonard Hofstadter: I get it. Smallville almost wrecked you.
- Sheldon Cooper: Exactly. You know, I waited ten years to see a guy everyone knows can fly, fly.
- Leonard Hofstadter: It's not just the date. We haven't talked about anything. Big wedding, small wedding, indoor, outdoor...
- Sheldon Cooper: Outdoor? Oh. I can RSVP no right now.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Sheldon, do you understand the irony of your fixation on a man with super speed, while after five years all I can get out of you is a distracted make-out session on a couch?
- Sheldon Cooper: Irony's not really my strong suit.