- [first lines]
- Danny Griffin: Colour coordinated. Impressive.
- Steve McAndrew: I learn from the best, Danny.
- Danny Griffin: Have you incorporated a forecast for unforeseeable expenditure?
- Steve McAndrew: If you mean will I have any cash left after paying off my bills today, the answer's no.
- Danny Griffin: And how much have you allocated to live on?
- Steve McAndrew: Well, let's put it this way: I'll be bringing in a pack lunch for the next year.
- Danny Griffin: Hmh. Oh!
- [rubs his neck]
- Steve McAndrew: What?
- Danny Griffin: I left my memory-foam pillow at Fiona's place, you know. Stiff as a board this morning.
- Steve McAndrew: The joys of living in two different places. You know I let a girlfriend have a drawer at my place once. Within a week she'd moved in, cushions, soft toilet paper, and one of those air fresheners that squirts at you every time you walk past them.
- Danny Griffin: I take it you broke up.
- Steve McAndrew: Eh, yeah. Kept the air freshener, though. They're actually very nice.They're rich in pine, I think.
- [last lines]
- Danny Griffin: [sitting at a bus stop] Can't believe you just did that.
- Steve McAndrew: It's for the best.
- Danny Griffin: Oh yes, this is much better than driving.
- [long pause]
- Danny Griffin: Even so, Steve, selling your car; it's a bit extreme.
- Steve McAndrew: I made a promise to my boy. Now he can get a set of wheels and I can sleep at night. I mean, enough's enough, Danny. I-i-it's time I bloody well grew up, a-an-and I'm selling the flat as well.
- Danny Griffin: You know, change can be a good thing. The future is a curious creature.
- Steve McAndrew: Now don't go all optimistic on me. There's just so much a poor Scotsman can handle in one day...
- Danny Griffin: Hasta la vista, baby.
- Ted Case: That's not Bruce Willis; that's Arnie.
- Steve McAndrew: You really need to start watching more TV, Danny.
- Danny Griffin: Do wish people would stop saying that.
- Danny Griffin: Who'd want to spend their life being a look alike. Strange thing to do.
- Ted Case: Come on Danny, where's your imagination? There must be someone you want to be. I think I'd be Siegfried or Roy. Which ever one didn't get mauled by the tiger.