- Mellie Grant: So, Bitsy, I have adhered to the wishes President Cooper laid out in his funeral plan, but there are a few options he left open. In terms of hymns, "Bring us, O lord" is always so spiritual, and since the President's faith was such an important part of his life...
- Bitsy Cooper: Oh, please. My husband's only religion was believing he had to screw anything with a pulse. But since us bitches have got to get through this dog and pony show, I'm gonna need you to sit down, shut up, and follow my lead. Now, I'm gonna take the office. I'll do the planning, and you go crochet, or vaccinate fat kids, or whatever silly hobby makes you feel like you're making a difference. Show up for the photo ops, and I'll have someone call you if I need you for anything else.
- [pointing at the heirloom she had just been fawning over]
- Bitsy Cooper: Oh, um I'd get that filthy piece of crap out of here, pronto. Probably give you crabs.
- Olivia Pope: The truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a while, but it's not gonna go away.
- Mellie Grant: So, I have the list of speakers if you'd like to go over the order.
- Bitsy Cooper: Does it matter? I'm sure they'll all spout the same pretty lies about my dead husband how he strengthened the military and reformed the tax code and negotiated the Baltic Peace Accords, blah, blah, blah.
- Mellie Grant: Well, he *did* do all of that.
- Bitsy Cooper: *I* did all that. You know, they didn't know about ADD back then, but Coop could barely sit through a two-page briefing, God love him. On top of which, he was never the brightest bulb. *I* strengthened the military. *I* pushed the tax code through. *I* negotiated the Baltic Peace Accords.
- Olivia Pope: You're not going to die.
- Jake Ballard: [sitting on the floor badly beaten] I think your father might disagree with you about that. Not to mention the President of the United States. He thinks I'm guilty, and I'm sure you do, too. So, I could sit here and rattle on about being framed, and your father being behind the whole thing. But, really, that's just my word, and why should you trust my word? I've been lying to you ever since we met, right? My word is not going to change anything. It can't. We both know, in the end, you're not going to choose me. And that's okay. Olivia, I want you to know I need you to know Not choosing me is okay.
- Mellie Grant: [to the press] Fitz is a Navy man who will never take action to diminish our armed forces or in any way risk compromising our strength and security, both at home and abroad. Thank you all!
- Bitsy Cooper: [whispers as they walk off] I have a joint in my handbag, and it's not gonna smoke itself. Would you like to join me on the Truman balcony?
- Mellie Grant: [giggles]
- [first lines]
- Rowan Pope: [dreaming of swimming and sexual encounters then sees her father] My God, Olivia. Wake up.
- Abby Whelan: [about Jake] He was taken into custody two days ago and hasn't been seen since.
- President Fitzgerald Grant: Has anyone from the press asked you about him?
- Abby Whelan: No.
- President Fitzgerald Grant: Then you're not asking as part of your official duties as White House Press Secretary.
- Abby Whelan: No.
- President Fitzgerald Grant: You just thought you'd stroll on into the Oval Office and ask the Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces about something you have no security clearance for.
- Abby Whelan: I'm not asking the Commander in Chief. I'm asking the married man who used to sleep with my friend, what exactly he has done with the man she's currently sleeping with.
- Mellie Grant: [sitting with martinis talking] I tried. I tried so hard. But now I think I'm just gonna get through it, play my part. 'Cause no matter what I do, there's only one person my husband listens to, and she's... I'm sorry.
- Bitsy Cooper: Only one? Lucky you. When we got to the White House, I made sure his secretary was the homeliest woman I could find. And he still managed to bang her twice a day, every day, for eight years. Oh, my, that poor woman. Ohh. But after a while, I mean, I was grateful. Gave me time to actually run the country.
- Leonard Carnehan: Two weeks ago, people were still saying that the Russians shot Cooper. Russians in Stockton? But you made sure that the whole world knew the truth. 'Cause like you said, the truth is like the sun. You can shut it out, but it's not going away. No, it's what you do. You fight for the underdog. You gave the story a happy ending to my story. So, thank you, Olivia Pope, for making my life meaningful. Now, get me the electric chair. And no lethal-injection crap! I want to go out with a bang!
- [last lines]
- Rowan Pope: What the hell did you do, Olivia? Did you intervene to save Jake Ballard's life?
- Olivia Pope: No.
- Rowan Pope: No?
- Olivia Pope: No, not just Jake. Both of them. I intervened to save both their lives.
- Rowan Pope: You. You crossed me?
- Olivia Pope: You may be Command, dad, but I have weapons at my disposal. Weapons you can't possibly possess.