Silicon Valley (TV Series)

Two Days of the Condor (2015)

Thomas Middleditch: Richard Hendricks

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Quotes 

• Gavin Belson : I feel terrible it's come to this, Richard. But who knows? Sometimes things like this are for the best. I know this one is for me. If you hadn't blackmailed me into this arbitration, I was gonna have to go in front of the Hooli Board of Directors and ask for $250 million to buy you out.

  Richard Hendricks : Wow. $250 million?

  Gavin Belson : Believe it or not, your algorithm is the only way to make Nucleus work. I was ready to pay whatever it took. Let me ask you this. If I offered you 10 million for Pied Piper right now, before we even go in there, would you take it?

  Richard Hendricks : Really? You'd do that?

  Gavin Belson : [laughs cruelly]  No, of course not. I'm about to get it for free. I'm just fucking with you.

• Donald 'Jared' Dunn : What just happened?

  Richard Hendricks : Well, apparently, Raviga held an emergency meeting of Pied Piper's Board of Directors... And they voted to remove me as CEO of my own company. I just got fired.

  Erlich Bachman : [There's a long silence]  And what about me?

• Richard Hendricks : You're selling the house just like that?

  Erlich Bachman : It wasn't a rash decision. I agonized over it.

  Donald 'Jared' Dunn : But what about your incubator?

  Erlich Bachman : What about it, Jared? Pied Piper has caked its pants, Jian-Yang's chances of investment have literally gone up in smoke, and you heard what Monahan said in court yesterday. Market forces and random events have conspired against me to make the success of my incubator all but impossible. Functionally, all I've really achieved is running a flop house where guys have shat, jerked off, and paid me no rent.

  Dinesh Chugtai : Well, we have accomplished one other thing. We're up over 20,000 viewers.

  [Looks at the feed of the stranded tech guy] 

  Richard Hendricks : Holy shit. Really?

  Dinesh Chugtai : Buzzfeed linked to us. Now we're picking up on Reddit. This guy falling off a cliff is the first good luck we've had.

• Dinesh Chugtai : Right as we're gaining traction, we have to hand it all over to Gavin fucking Belson. This is fucked.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : We can't give it to him if we don't have it to give.

  Richard Hendricks : What do you mean? We do have it, and we have to give it.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : One hundred percent if what he's trying to take from us exists digitally on servers in this house. If we nuke them, there's nothing for him to seize. As far as he knows, it's an accident.

  Richard Hendricks : No one would believe that.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : Two weeks ago, we accidentally erased one-third of Intersite's entire library.

  Dinesh Chugtai : I think we've established our ineptitude beyond a reasonable doubt.

• Richard Hendricks : Whoa, it is, like, 500 degrees in here.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : Yeah. Anton is really starting to sweat.

  Dinesh Chugtai : Yeah, I still can't believe you gave the servers a man's name.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : Sorry, I couldn't remember your mother's name.

  Richard Hendricks : Hey, why don't I just open up the garage door? Let some fresh air in here.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : Yeah, sure, if you want the cooling system to shut down and everything in here to turn to magma. Actually, with all the new servers I have running, we're about to max out the amperage and blow the main breaker anyway.

  Dinesh Chugtai : Sooner or later, Gilfoyle's servers are gonna fail, and then it's all done.

  Bertram Gilfoyle : My servers can handle 10 times the traffic if they weren't busy apologizing for your shit codebase.

  Dinesh Chugtai : Oh, yeah? Well, my codebase could handle this traffic, fuck your mother, make a video of it, upload it, and even that video would not even buffer.

• Judge Underwood : Mr. Belson, there is language in this contract that the California Supreme Court has deemed unlawful. Preventing Mr. Dunn from seeking employment elsewhere is a violation of his rights. Are you aware of this?

  Gavin Belson : I was not, but I'm willing to drop that count altogether if it makes things easier.

  Judge Underwood : Well, here's the thing. This clause was unlawful when you included it in Mr. Hendricks' employment agreement.

  Gavin Belson : Right. As I said, I'm willing to just move past this.

  Judge Underwood : See, again, I don't think you understand. If Mr. Hendricks hadn't hired Mr. Dunn, or you hadn't pursued him for that hire, I'm not sure I would've noticed the violation. But you did, so I did.

  Richard Hendricks : [Whispers]  What's happening?

  Pete Monahan : Justice, baby.

  Judge Underwood : And what I find is, this is an unenforceable contract. It is null and void. So, effectively, Mr. Hendricks never had a valid employment agreement with Hooli. As a result, Hooli has no claim to ownership of Pied Piper's underlying IP. That is my ruling and per your arbitration agreement, it is binding and final. Thank you, everyone.