- Nobbo: The stuff I used to see when I was doing nights... I shit you not, I could write a book. The amount of fingerings... West end, Saturday night, girls getting fingered left, right, and centre. And you could tell they were loving it. What about you, Davina? Like a bit of fingers?
- Davina: Nobbo, I am a lady of taste and decorum. Of course I like a bit of fingers.
- Liz Garvey: Did you find that gossip piece on Richard?
- Mia: Uh, yeah eventually. It's tiny. Richard makes a speech every year at the Passing-Out Parade. He talks about Northern Ireland, a fire-bombing near Cookstown. He saved three people. Only now they're saying he didn't save three people. He only saved two.
- Liz Garvey: That's it?
- Mia: Well, he's still a hero. He's just 33 percent less of a hero than he thought.
- Liz Garvey: I can't ask for a retraction on this. It makes us look fucking coconuts.
- Mia: He gets a bit like this about things that mention him by name. We just file it in a special box marked, Richard's massive ego.
- [first lines]
- Robert 'Robbie' Bass: Armed police! Occupants of the house, show yourself! Armed police! Armed police! Come out and hold your hands in the air!
- Liz Garvey: I'm not gonna dress this up, Sharon. I'd like to Taze you.
- Sharon: Hmm?
- Liz Garvey: We've had a Tazing fatality, which is obviously tragic, but what compounds the tragedy is that the results of the inquest are due on the day of the policing conference.
- Sharon: Oh, great. Maybe, could you Taze me, then? On stage, in front of a room full of my peers. Let off a confetti bomb as I hit the ground.
- Liz Garvey: A practical demonstration in front of the press. It kills the story stone-dead. Come on, you know that Charlie would eat this up. He'd be out in front of the cameras with a target painted on his chest. Taze me, Taze me! You know why? Visibility. You're the invisible woman, Sharon. Get Tazed. Be seen.
- Sharon: Oh, so now you're doing me a favour? Wow, thanks Liz. Big pals.
- [sighs]
- Sharon: I'll think about it.