Death Battle (TV Series)

Kirby VS Majin Buu (2014)

Ben B. Singer: Wizard - Host

Quotes 

• Wizard : Imagine right now, what does the apocalyptic destroyer of worlds look like?

  Boomstick : Stop thinking, because you're wrong. It's these pudgy pink terrors. Kirby, Nintendo's floating puff-ball of never-ending cheer and dreams.

  Wizard : And Majin Buu, the most vicious monster in the Dragonball universe.

• Wizard : True terror is something unpredictable, unstoppable, and dreadfully deceiving.

  Boomstick : A perfect description for the pink monstrosity known as Majin Buu. Majin Buu is a fat, pink, man-sized baby thing with enough power to destroy a planet. And I assume he's made of some sort of bubble gum. Probably Big League Chew.

  Wizard : Buu has existed since the dawn of time, but was only discovered five million years ago by the nefarious wizard, Bibidi. Bibidi released Majin Buu on a helpless universe, intent on destroying everything. After annihilating hundreds of planets, Bibidi set his sights on Earth, sending Buu ahead in a sealed capsule just waiting to be released.

  Boomstick : But then Bibidi got himself killed before he could get to Earth and release the pink terror. But no worries, the weird lizard-wizard-thing had a back-up plan in the form of a magic clone named Babidi. Yes, clone, not son, that was a mistranslation. So, Bibidi, Babidi and Buu.

  [sings] 

  Boomstick : Put 'em together and what do you get?

  Wizard : A Disney lawsuit.

  Boomstick : Anyway, the doppelganger Babidi set out on a quest to recover Buu and complete Bibidi's plan.

  Wizard : Eventually, Babidi found Buu and opened the monster's shell. But, turns out there was a... slight defect and Buu was... umm...

  Boomstick : A complete idiot.

  Majin Buu : Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-hoo!

• Wizard : Over a thousand years ago, an epic war waged throughout the universe. The legendary Star Warriors battled against the vile Nightmare for the freedom of everything that ever was. Ultimately, good prevailed, but at the cost of many, many lives. Yet one infant Star Warrior escaped the carnage, destined to awaken a millennium later and save the galaxy. His name... is Kirby.

  [record scratches] 

  Kirby : Hi-i-i-i!

  Boomstick : Wait, what? The cute cuddly pink puffball who lives in Happyland? Are you sure you're reading the right back story?

  Wizard : Yes! He crash landed on Popstar, the most confusingly-shaped planet ever, and has been defending the kingdom of Dream Land ever since.

  Boomstick : But look at him! He's just so adorable and cuddly. He couldn't hurt a fly.

  Wizard : Kirby is a ravenous cannibal who thrives on the blood of mass murder.

  Boomstick : Holy shit!

• Wizard : He may not look it, but Kirby is a powerhouse. He possesses incredible strength, speed, durability and an arsenal stranger than an average day in Florida.

  Boomstick : His trademark power is his inhale ability, which sucks almost everything in with a powerful vortex. With it, he can clear out everything from a quick meal to an acre of forest in a matter of seconds.

  Wizard : Plus, Kirby's body is malleable, allowing him to stretch his mouth and inhale larger objects, though he does have trouble wrapping his mouth around extremely large and heavy things.

  Boomstick : LIKE MY DI - !

  Wizard : [interrupting]  Kirby weighs practically nothing, allowing him to inflate his body and fly like a sentient balloon. He can traverse the skies, and outer space, by using his own personal vehicle, the Warp Star.

  Boomstick : Which he can call up at any time on speed dial. No, really, he uses a cell phone. Somebody get me that number! I tried 1-800-PINK-RIDE, but it was something else...

  Wizard : The Warp Star is Kirby's primary means of transportation through the universe, and can travel at speeds faster than light. It is forged of Kirby's own energy, so, while delicate, should it be destroyed, Kirby can easily create a new one on his own, making the cell phone kind of pointless.

  Boomstick : I'd be happy to take that phone off his hands, though I'm a bit iffy on standing anywhere near that star-driving balloon marshmallow. Look at him! He doesn't even care! He's a monster!

  Wizard : It's about to get even worse: guess what just happened to that poor creature? See, when Kirby swallows a victim, they don't exactly die. Turns out Kirby's stomach, is, in fact, an entirely separate and endless dimension of reality.

  Boomstick : So he never feels full. Talk about getting your money's worth at an all-you-can-eat-buffet, though.

  Wizard : Kirby can trap thousands of victims in this abyss. Then, he can actually enter his own stomach dimension and draw from his captive's power using his Copy ability.

  Boomstick : How in the hell? Does he, like, swallow himself?

  Wizard : He likely projects an astral image of himself within the dimension, which can act on the physical plain.

• Wizard : Kirby is remarkably tough. He's powerful enough to crack a planet in half, fast enough to run on water, and strong enough to throw a monster thirty times his size, on a frying pan, all the way to the sun, circle the burning star, and return to Kirby's feet, with the perfectly cooked monster.

  Boomstick : I think that might be the most ridiculous feat we've ever seen on Death Battle. But he's not just strong, he's so tough that he was barely fazed after being crushed under thousands of tons of pressure, and effortlessly survived an explosion massive enough to eclipse the entire world.

  Wizard : He's achieved all of this despite being only eight inches tall.

  Boomstick : See? It's not the size of the monster, it's how he throws a FUCKING HUMUNGOUS FRYING PAN INTO THE SUN AND BACK!

  Wizard : Well, Kirby does have one crucial flaw: he's a baby, and has yet to fully mature as a Star Warrior.

  Boomstick : Yeah, he's not too bright, so he's not gonna be whipping up any genius strategies mid-fight. Fortunately, he's powerful enough to get away with it. Kirby is the most adorably terrifying thing in the world.

• Wizard : Buu is the equivalent of a man-sized toddler with the power of a billion nuclear warheads.

  Boomstick : Talk about your terrible twos. Buu has a ridiculous arsenal for killing worlds: he can fly, shoot lasers, destroy cities by breathing too hard, and can fire a beam from his head-penis that can turn people into candy.

  Wizard : Boomstick, it's not his genitals, it's his... well... actually, I don't know what it is. Which brings me to his strangest ability, his whole body in general. Whatever he's made of, it's magic in nature. Buu's whole body can be pulled, stretched, or even ripped apart with no negative effects.

  Boomstick : He can even pull entire slabs from his belly and use his own flesh as a weapon. Ah, this is just keeps getting stranger and stranger.

  Wizard : Yes, and he apparently does feel pain, though it seems to please him. Like some sort of combat masochist. Fortunately, his body can regenerate almost instantly.

  Boomstick : He can be blasted to smithereens and reform himself in seconds. He's practically invincible.

• Wizard : In a universe chock full of planet busters, Majin Buu is one of the strongest. He's destroyed entire galaxies by systematically obliterating each planet one by one over time.

  Boomstick : He's defeated most of Dragonball Z's most powerful characters, including Vegeta, Gotenks, and Gohan.

  Wizard : He one-shot the king of the demon realm, and easily bested the Supreme Kais.

  Boomstick : Who are like the gods of other gods, so needless to say, Buu is pretty frickin' strong.

  Wizard : But he's also extremely cocky, caring little about strategy or personal safety, and while his regenerative ability seems to make him indestructible, Buu is one of the only Dragonball characters who's body has been visibly affected by ordinary bullets.

  Boomstick : And while being able to destroy planets, his body's not tough enough to take the explosion, forcing him to regenerate from a mass of pink particles.

  Wizard : Despite having the mind of a child and the body of Play-Doh, Majin Buu might just be the deadliest villain in Dragonball history.

• Boomstick : Anyway, with the Copy ability, Kirby's form and power change based on what he's eating. By devouring an enemy with a mallet, he can become Hammer Kirby, a master of whack-a-mole!

  Wizard : Fire Kirby can unleash a torrent of flame and survive all manner of heat. Ice Kirby can freeze his foes solid. Wheel Kirby is fast enough to drive around the entire kingdom of Dream Land in under two seconds, though who knows how he can see where he's going.

  Boomstick : There's Mike Kirby, who singing talent is apparently so awful, everything that hears it dies.

  [Mike Kirby is seen singing, causing several monsters to explode] 

  Boomstick : Like Wiz at karaoke night with the ladies.

  Wizard : Yea... HEY!

  Boomstick : Stone Kirby is nearly indestructible, and Sword Kirby is a master with a blade. He can even fire sword beams, which can cut through anything without mercy. DAMN! But that's not all. He can pour a ton of energy into the blade, and make it grow into the powerful Ultra Sword.

  Wizard : Fighter Kirby is a master martial artist. And by inhaling a Miracle Fruit, he becomes Hyper Nova Kirby, capable of devouring worlds. Last but not least, by absorbing his own Warp Star, Kirby can create his ultimate weapon, the Star Rod, a magical staff powered by dreams and capable of destroying evil... and most of the moon.

  Boomstick : The only problem with Kirby's copy ability is, they don't last. One bad hit, and there it goes.

• Wizard : Buu can mimic any Ki attack after seeing it in action only once. This is how he learned Goku's Kamehameha wave and Supreme Kai's Instantaneous Movement teleport. But his copying prowess goes even further. He can physically absorb other people, transforming his mind and body.

  Boomstick : [seeing Buu absorb Gotenks]  That's the most disturbing thing I've ever seen.

  Wizard : Each version of Buu has a different personality, based on whom he's absorbed. Fat Buu is cheerful and childlike, due to absorbing the carefree Grand Supreme Kai. But then there's his original and most dangerous form, Kid Buu.

  Boomstick : He's so tiny! He's like a little kid in MC Hammer pants. This can't seriously be his deadliest form.

  Wizard : Kid Buu is pure rage incarnate. He can get so angry, he's capable of tearing holes in the fabric of reality just by screaming.

  Boomstick : Or, if he's fed up with whatever planet he's on, he'll just blow it to bits with his Planet Burst attack.

• [Kirby has utterly annihilated Majin Buu by swallowing a Miracle Fruit and becoming Hyper Nova Kirby, spitting out a Planet Burst which sends Buu hurtling into the sun and incinerating him] 

  Boomstick : No way! Did that seriously just happen?

  Wizard : Yep. Oddly enough, Kirby's strength, speed and durability matched and surpassed Buu's. Yes, Buu has more destructive capability, but Kirby's inhale and Copy ability let him absorb and rebound anything that could have killed him.

  Boomstick : And Kirby's no slouch when it comes to power. He tanked a planet-sized explosion without a scratch when the same kind of blast turns Buu into mush. And remember the frying pan thing?

  Wizard : Popstar is approximately the same size as the planet Shiver Star, which is actually a post-apocalyptic Earth. This means Popstar's gravity and escape velocity must be similar to that of Earth's. Throwing the giant acid monster Popon up to the sun means Kirby threw at least 3.5 tons over 25,000 miles per hour, and that's not even counting the giant frying pan or the return trip.

  Boomstick : And Kirby's Warp Star moves faster than light, a speed that Buu has never had to combat before. "But Boomstick, Buu could teleported away from the Planet Burst ball, right?"

  Wizard : Well, his Instantaneous Movement has limits in extreme situations, such as when he didn't use it when a similar giant ball of murder was KILLING him at the end of "Dragon Ball Z".

  Boomstick : Buu just couldn't stomach this fight.

  Wizard : The winner is Kirby.