Catastrophe (TV Series)

Episode #1.6 (2015)

Rob Delaney: Rob Norris

Quotes 

• Sharon Morris : Did you miss me?

  Rob Norris : I was angry at how much I missed you.

  Sharon Morris : I missed you too. Just the last two days, though... Did you watch porn?

  Rob Norris : Yeah. Absolutely... But I would always take a pillow and make a little Sharon out of it that I would hug while I... watched.

  Sharon Morris : I did the same, just without the pillow... Actually it's hard for me to masturbate at the moment because I've got to look over my belly to do it, and I know there's a baby in there, so it's kind of off-putting... It's like you wouldn't want to have a wank if there were kids playing in the background, you know?

• Sharon Morris : why don't you go and fuck another drunk woman and see if she'll have a nicer, less complicated pregnancy for you?

  Rob Norris : You know, I would but I've already hitched my wagon to this... horse.

  Sharon Morris : Horse?

  Rob Norris : Horse, I don't know, donkey... Whatever you hitch a wagon to.

• Rob Norris : You are without a doubt the most hard to please person I have ever met... If I showed you a rainbow, you'd be like, Oh, there's too many colours. There's too many colours on one thing.