- Kermit the Frog: Listen, Piggy, will you please not try to build a house with Reese? You're doing this for all the wrong reasons.
- Miss Piggy: I'm doing this to show up Reese in front of the press.
- Kermit the Frog: But that's...
- Miss Piggy: A perfect reason.
- Kermit the Frog: No, it's...
- Miss Piggy: A PERFECT REASON! Say it!
- Kermit the Frog: Absolutely not!
- Kermit the Frog: [seeing a catering truck parked in the studio lot] Bobo?
- Bobo the Bear: Yes, sir?
- Kermit the Frog: What is this truck doing here?
- Bobo the Bear: Oh, Piggy got it for the crew.
- Kermit the Frog: But this is where Reese Witherspoon has to park.
- Bobo the Bear: Well, I told Piggy that, and then she said, "Have her park at the structure." And I said, "Well, that's really far and it fills up early," and she said, "La la la, I can't hear you."
- Uncle Deadly: Piggy's obviously still holding a grudge over losing the lead in "Walk the Line" to Reese, who went on to win the Oscar.
- Kermit the Frog: Yeah, but I thought that grudge was replaced by the Natalie Portman grudge for stealing "Black Swan".
- Uncle Deadly: That was just a decoy grudge. It's always been Witherspoon.
- Kermit the Frog: Well...
- Uncle Deadly: Always.
- Kermit the Frog: Okay.
- Kermit the Frog: Big guest tonight on Up Late. we have Reese Witherspoon for the first time. Honestly I'm a little nervous, y'know. But, nerves are good. They keep you sharp. My cousin Albert used to tease me about it, then a hawk carried him off which simultaneously proved my point and ruined our camping trip.