User Reviews

An affair begins after an out of work fisherman delivers firewood to a writer staying in a cape cod village. It continues for 6 months. There seems to be no reason for it- Mike is happy with his family except for squabbles with his wife, Nancy, about work;.Elizabeth wants to start a family, but tells Mike she can't have children. Of course, she ends up pregnant. Mike wants nothing to do with it, or if he supports the child it's not mentioned. Fast forward two years- Elizabeth comes back to the cape with a (what appears to be a six month old) baby. Doing the math, the baby should be at least 15 months old, but Mike's own children haven't grown in two and a half years either. Mike admits the affair to his wife, who freaks and throws some clothes at him and tells him to get lost. Then she confronts Elizabeth in a very awkward encounter at Elizabeth's door. Later the town drug dealer hitches a ride with Elizabeth and forgets his giant bag of cocaine in her SUV. His drug boss is a little upset and they stake out Elizabeth's house that night. She pulls up, leaves the baby in a cold car and goes into the house to put groceries away. Instead of running to the unlocked SUV and getting the bag of drugs, the boss drug dealer goes into her house, grabs a knife, and presumably stabs her. WTF? In the end, everyone she knows goes in the house so I guess they are all suspects?? Ending scene is ridiculous. Dumb movie. I give it one star for the pretty houses.

This movie is a theatrical masterpiece. I think the other reviewers missed the fact that it is designed to be a though-provoking well nuanced example of film noir. Let's take a look at the worldly issues and clever analogies it presents to challenge the viewer.

Our hero, Mike Luna an unemployed fisherman who now delivers firewood for a living with a slightly retarded drug dealing side kick, meets a New York City hottie who just moved to the Cape to write books. After their first hook up (wood delivered?) , why does our hero Mike Luna immediately begin telling his new lover Liz about how much he loves his family while still in bed with her?

Why does Liz wear yoga pants for the first half of the movie? Is she quietly advertising for a yoga studio or is this a LuLu Lemon product placement?

Why does Mike Luna wear the same two flannel shirts during the entire movie which takes place over three years? Does he only shop at Filson? Is his bad sense of Seattle style a clue? Is he being sustainable? Is this LL Beans product placement?

Why does Mike Luna, an unemployed fisherman who just lost his boat live in an expensive and huge Cape Cod home and drive a $60,000 new Ford Truck? Is this an ad from Ford that even unemployed losers can get an F350 financed?

Why do the seasons change from mid -summer to late fall during the same week in Cape Cod? Is this a climate change warning cleverly hidden in the film?

Why does the town sheriff have only a cheap windbreaker and trucker's hat but no uniform, gun, badge, ticket book or squad car?

Why does the lovely New York fashion writer live in Cape Cod? Shouldn't she be in New York were flannel is not considered fashion? Why does she want to go to bed with the firewood delivery guy (Mike) seconds after meeting him?

Why does the old weather-beaten lady next door keep staring at Mike and his lover yet say nothing? Is she the director's mother?

Why does the sheriff tell Mike to "let it go" after Mike says he wants to find out who killed his lover? Would a real cop really say that if a murderer was on the loose?

Why does Mike and his very overweight wife (perhaps a Moby Dick reference cleverly hidden in the movie) shop at a trendy and obviously expensive little grocery when he is getting by working as a clam cop? Shouldn't Mike and his white whale wife be at Walmart or Costco buying hamburger helper with coupons?

Watch this film with friends and after a few drinks (quite a few), you will love it.

Clam cops, Clam cops, Watcha gonna do when they come for you?!

Did the director promise all of his buddies' family and friends that they could be in a movie? Why is it winter and then not and then winter again? Is that to indicate years going by? Like, one winter was just a flash of someone pulling out of a driveway in the snow then back to no snow. Random people just show up and are gone again. Poor clam cop got no clothes except for a couple of shirts. Baby mama managed to find a spray tan/shiny eyeshadow place in the seaside town - I think she took a wrong turn looking for Jersey. The wife had like a 3-minute freak out/wailing fit and weakly threw some clothes at her cheatin' man while he sits in the truck. Points for theme - even his boxers that wifey was tossing like they were overdone noodles were plaid. Next thing she's at the baby mama's door in her best makeup and heels saying he's forgiven and blah blah blah.

So moving right along :), the exaggerated (unintentionally) acting was award winning, the actors accidentally looking at the camera was gold, and the plot was awesome for someone like me with adhd. No worrying about trying to keep up, just roll with it. Seems like the director may have been a fan of naps or sick days, there's no way he was on set for this sh@t show.

Excellent movie for Christmas Day when you're trying to get your family to leave.

Like a cross between a z grade soap opera (complete with elevator muzac forced over every 'scene' and ridiculous close ups) and a community TV production where nobody has any professional training...

Seriously, this must have been a project for the socially awkward and possibly the mentally challenged.

Nobody knows what they are doing.

The acting is embarrassing. I have literally never felt embarrassed for an actor while watching a movie before. This must be some sort of joke? Like a bet - who can make the worst movie ever?

The hyperthermia scene... WTF? Happily digging for clams on a mild afternoon, upon on being spotted by the new sheriff (recently anointed by way of being handed a jacket with SHERIFF printed on it),

"where's your licence?" "My hands are frozen, you'll have to take my wallet out." the beret clad nutjob whines. 'Sheriff' then reaches into nutjob's back pocket while music swells ominously and pointlessly.

And who knew hypothermia could be cured by the pretty girl saying "no no, you'll be fine" Then- "Let me walk you to the door" to the sheriff. "Excuse me" to the rapidly recovered nutjob who is now fawning over her and singing inanely. The 'door' is literally 2 steps away.

I had to stop.