- Dirk Gently: Is that the woman?
- Todd Brotzman: I don't know her.
- Dirk Gently: Right, but that is a woman.
- Todd Brotzman: What are you even talking about?
- Gordon Rimmer: Give me the dog, or I kill her.
- Dirk Gently: Give us the her, or we'll throw the dog off the bridge.
- Todd Brotzman: [whispering] What?
- Dirk Gently: [whispering back] I'm bluffing. But if he shoots her, throw the dog off the bridge.
- Gordon Rimmer: Why did you attack us?
- Dirk Gently: We didn't? How do you know who we are?
- Gordon Rimmer: We don't. Where's the kitten?
- Todd Brotzman: What kitten?
- Dirk Gently: Who's thtat woman?
- Gordon Rimmer: You don't know her?
- Dirk Gently: Do you?
- Gordon Rimmer: Why did you burn my house down?
- Dirk Gently: I burnt your house down?
- Todd Brotzman: Where's Lydia?
- Gordon Rimmer: She's not here. Bring me the dog!
- Dirk Gently: Why do you want it?
- Gordon Rimmer: Why did you take it?
- Todd Brotzman: We don't know.
- Gordon Rimmer: Why did you kill Patrick Spring?
- Todd Brotzman: We didn't.
- Dirk Gently: Did you?
- Gordon Rimmer: Just bring me the dog.
- Ken: Oh, my god, oh my god, Jesus Christ. Did you just dodge a bullet?
- Bart Curlish: No, bullet dodged me. I can't be hurt. Universe won't allow it. Only constants are me and gravity. I'm special that way.
- Todd Brotzman: We can't go back there! He has a gun!
- Dirk Gently: Well...
- [pulls out a pocketknife]
- Dirk Gently: It's a good thing I've got this!
- Todd Brotzman: And what's that supposed to do?
- Dirk Gently: Well, you know what they say about bringing a knife to a gun fight!
- Todd Brotzman: That it's bad.
- Dirk Gently: Bloody hell! Is THAT what that means?
- Ken: What happened?
- Bart Curlish: The car turned off?
- Ken: You're not gonna try and fix it?
- Bart Curlish: The car tunrned off here, this where the car turned off. I'm sure it will start up again when it's meant to. Cars are like that, always turning off and on again, breaking down and then fixing themselves.
- Ken: No, they aren't.
- Dirk Gently: Thank you for helping me through that. I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't been there.
- Todd Brotzman: Yeah, well, I was there. You're really brave, sort of. Like crazy brave, or maybe just stupid, but wow. And also surprisingly incapable. How have you survieved this long?
- Ed: Hello, friend. We are Ed, Zed, and Fred. These are not our real names.
- Farah Black: What a relief, those name are so stupid!