Vampire Cleanup Department (2017) Poster

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6/10
Holy Jumpin' Vampires Batman
futuretype25 December 2017
Warning: Spoilers
This cockamany story has the "hero" bitten by a vampire but he turns out to be immune (explained in the first twenty minutes) and joins a Ghostbusters like anti-Vampire crew only to be assigned to sweeping the floors, where he develops kung fu like moves akin to the Karate Kid. On a search for vampires he encounters a drowned ugly one [aren't they all?] that swallows his cell phone. He falls into the water trying to retrieve it and they lock lips making the vampire iurn into a beautiful twenty year old woman who died (was buried alive) in the 1800's.

She hops around, as apparently Chinese vampires do (which helps me better understand "Crazy Safari" where a Ctinese vampire falls out of a plane over Botswana {The Gods Must Be Crazy #3 of 5}). She is able to communicate account the cell phone she shallowed (using Siri like exchanges). She takes a fancy to old Chinese Operas on the television so he leaves her watching while he attends his other duties - what could go wrong?
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7/10
Nice movie with a heartwarming ending.
Aktham_Tashtush15 August 2018
The movie is surprisingly good, i thought it would be one of those lame vampires movies but it wasn't ,, the comedy was clear, fast and comprehensible, the action and fight moves were also impressive.

The cinematography and CGI was really good,, the story itself though appeared short ,, this would look much better on a TV show .. I liked the intro where it looked like the credits from Sherlock movie ..

The cast are funny and engaging ,, loved them all.

Final thought,, lately i'v been watching a lot of Korean movies ,, and this Chinese one popped up by accident on my list ,, but it was all worth it so it is without a doubt recommended.
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5/10
Quite likable but not especially good Hong Kong action-comedy-horror
Red-Barracuda27 June 2017
After a sinister late-night encounter, a geeky young guy discovers that he is immune to vampire toxins. He is, therefore, summoned by the Vampire Cleanup Department who are a small group of specialists dedicated to combatting and dispelling vampires.

This Hong Kong feature is a genre mash-up of comedy, horror and action (with even a little bit of romance thrown in for good measure). The comedy wasn't especially funny, the horror was peripheral and the action was fairly unremarkable, resulting in a middling movie. The most interesting character was the female vampire that our geeky hero develops a love affair with. She is played like a fish-out-of-water innocent and displays some of the very unusual vampire traits associated with China, i.e. the hopping vampire! This type of detail specific to China is good fun to see and the character of the girl vampire was pretty good value. But the film as a whole was a bit ho hum otherwise with nothing much else sanding out very much. It is quite a cute film though and is hard to dislike but I personally only found it sporadically entertaining.
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Light entertainment
jim-man25 December 2017
Vampire Cleanup Department (2017)

The term 'vampire' is incorrect in this Chinese genre (dating from literature of the 19th Century). The living corpses are more like zombies (the animated dead). They hop around (hahaha!) and attack humans.

In the 1980s, this genre was briefly popular in Hong Kong movies, Since this genre predated the craze for zombies in the West, the term vampire was applied in the English translation. And sure enough, some zombies went for the neck.

In the context of a feudal rural context, the old movies were atmospheric and spooky. This movie is set in modern Hong Kong, and the old-style zombies look silly where there are motorcars and SWAT.

The special effects are minimal. So, the actors have to ham it up. With the small budget, the film makers have to target micro audiences.

Richard Ng represents nostalgia. The film starts with a bloody flourish in slasher style.

Then, we are introduced to the small team of 'ghostbusters' known as Vampire Cleanup Department (VCD). The VCD hang out in a Batcave-style secret HQ.

Then, there is the romance angle. The VCD has a young recruit who falls for a teen zombie. Interestingly, the teen zombie looks like a doll (Japanese fetish for life-like girl dolls).

The bottom line is that this is a commercial production with little originality. Possibly entertaining if you are looking for a little entertainment. But, its not the next-big-thing as the producers might hope.
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2/10
Personally speaking... waste of time...
kperakis20 September 2018
First thing first:I always rate judging by what the movie actually aims to sell.I rate "The Godfather" and "12 Angry men" as excellent movies, but I also rate "Top Secret" and "Airplane" very highly in their own genre, and the same applies for "Sharknado". So I don't pretend to be a movie critic stuck with cinefil movies or a B-movie junkie. To the actual review: I honestly regret spending the time to watch this movie! I don't know what actually made it feel so bad. The bad acting? The even worse story? The humiliating representation of vampires who just jump around for the first time in history? The fact that it turns out to be yet another love story??? OK...maybe for people with Eastern culture it makes more sense...but for people with a more Western philosophy...I think it will be a waste of time...
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6/10
A Chinese Ghostbusters/Karate Kid Romantic Comedy mix
cauwboy9 June 2020
After having watched the very dark and depressing Rigor Mortis, I soon found out about this film, with Siu-Ho Chin back as a badass vampire fighter and his old sidekick played by the forever funny Richard Ng. I complained about Rigor Mortis that it took itself too serious and that stripping out every little piece of humour might only have harmed the film more. As for this film, you get an idea at once what you're in for, a comedy with some spooky elements, not horrific, I was never scared during this film, this is more like a kindergarten horror if anything. There's also something with the way this film is filmed and lit that makes it feels like a direct-to-DVD film, it's too clean and too smooth, like the young actors having way too much makeup making them look artificial.

Anyway, after Rigor Mortis ended up being too dark, this film was just too light-hearted, our main protagonist Tim ending up falling in love with a girl vampire (although she looks like a normal girl) and has to hide it from the Vampire Cleanup Department (VCD) while he learns to become a vampire fighter like them. The VCD crew is a bunch of silly/crazy/cool group of people like the Ghostbusters, fighting vampires and do it really well too. And during the film, Tim gets trained by the different people at the Department to be a vampire fighter himself, including swiping the floor and throwing the waste in the trash bin, which took me a couple of seconds to figure out where it was leading to *coughs* Karate Kid *coughs*.

The main threat of the film is a bad, powerful vampire attacking the city they live in and the film had such a light-hearted tone to it that I never feared that anyone would really end up die - like I said, Kindergarten Horror. I did however have a bigger problem with the sugar-sweet love story going on between Tim and the vampire girl, because of movie, she ended up sucking some of his vampire-immunity from him in the beginning of the film, making her look like a super-cute model girl, more or less. Why not make her a ghost instead of a vampire? The film-makers obviously must've seen Mr. Vampire and could probably find a way to make it work better than having her just jump around. We even got a blink-and-you-miss-it cameo of Ching-Ying Lam in a photograph handed to Richard Ng's character.

Still, it could've been a much worse film, I can actually see myself watch this film again in the future, it was an easy watch, even if the romance between Tim and the vampire girl made me want to hug a big teddybear and "squee" like a teenage girl, which is not the way I would've wanted it as a fan of 80s HK Horror Comedies - I'm still happy though that Hong Kong is keeping the Chinese Vampire franchise alive, even if it never will reach the same level as Mr. Vampire or Spooky Encounters.
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5/10
Hop along...
shiyosunderland29 July 2017
This hopping-Chinese-vampire-comedy felt very shallow. It tries to be hip and modern but feels as hip as Babyjohns granny in her hibbedy-hob-garments - it's a joke. Babyjohn himself made me want to grab the TV and shake it, although cruelty against minors is not my thing at all. The romance was completely artificial and the story itself tries to be too many things at once while failing to deliver any of the real goods like horror, comedy or action. "Vampire Cleanup Department" feels more like a failed TV-Show and tries to update the Jiang-Shi-Lore with elements from Blade and Buffy without providing any original life energy for us to suck up.

+ classic ("Mr. Vampire") veterans on board! It's great to see Richard Ng and Chin Siu-Ho again and there's even a cameo from Eric Tsang. That's nice! - Lead actors are not at all interesting - script is all over the place - Makup effects are not very frightening - Digital fx are very bad. The vampire kills are very much doing the same as "Blade" did, but that movie is 20 years old soon and looks a million times better. - romance: Maybe this works for Youtube junkies. I don't know. I hope not otherwise mankind might be doomed. What happens at the end?Does it make sense at all? - Babyjohn? Is he a kid, is he an adult? Watch this movie and see for yourselves!

verdict: hop along, hop along, there's nothing to see here.
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7/10
Sweet little comedy if you're in the right state of mind
lotekguy-119 May 2021
Don't expect a lot of gore. Think of a Karate Kid with vampires to confront. Then add the most adorable "child of the night" (Min Chen Lin) to ever grace the genre. Her character alone justifies giving this bit of fluff a look. Silly? Yes. But in a good way, if you're in the mood for the novelty it offers.
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