- Peter Griffin: Ordering a drone is gonna be a blast! Even more fun than when I had breakfast in bread.
- Peter Griffin: [cut to a scene where Peter is baked into a large loaf of bread] Hi, Lois. It's a great morning. No matter how you SLICE it.
- Lois Griffin: I don't know what this is Peter, but we are four months behind our mortgage.
- Peter Griffin: Well, that's odd. It's not like we're short on DOUGH.
- Lois Griffin: I'm taking the kids and staying at my parents' house for a while.
- Peter Griffin: That's the YEAST of my concerns!
- Rob Gronkowski: What's going on here? Are you guys trying to get rid of me?
- Peter Griffin: Yeah we are trying to get rid of you!
- Rob Gronkowski: Why?
- Peter Griffin: 'Cause you're a pain in the ass to live next to! I mean, what the hell, Gronk? Why you gotta be like this! You're a *millionaire*! You have the sweetest job in the world, you can do whatever you want! Why do you gotta act like such an idiot all the time?
- Rob Gronkowski: It's not a choice, Grover. Or rather, an obligation. You see, I'm been groomed for this my entire life. Scoring touchdowns, making people laugh, punishing my body... And in the name, all in the name of entertainment. Don't you understand? I'm a commodity. A product. A modern day gladiator. You ask about the why's and the therefore's behind the boorish fascade. The answer is simple: I play a jester because society deems it neccessary.
- [the guys stare at him in awe]
- Rob Gronkowski: Also, I'm fucking insane! Eat a butt, fatty! Gronk ain't going nowhere!
- Lois Griffin: Well, thank goodness we finally have our neighborhood back.
- Peter Griffin: Yeah, now maybe Wilson can move back in and give me homespun wisdom over the fence.
- Lois Griffin: Peter, that was "Home Improvement."
- Peter Griffin: It's exhausting that you never just go with something I say.
- Rob Gronkowski: Hey, you guys seem great. You want to come in and eat pizza standing up?
- Peter Griffin: Uh, yeah.
- Rob Gronkowski: Cool. You mind if I call you all Grover? I don't like learning names.
- Peter Griffin: Yeah, sure, that'd be sweet.
- Rob Gronkowski: Well, come on in, Grover.
- Peter Griffin: [excited gasp] He knows my name!
- Stewie Griffin: Well, you were right, the farmer's market is wonderful. You've got your yoga pants moms, you got your mixed-race kids riding a pony, a confused Jerome...
- Jerome: What is this? A vegetable parking lot?
- Stewie Griffin: Now, remember to tell customers that this honey is farm-to-table.
- Brian Griffin: We're not a restaurant. That doesn't make any sense.
- Stewie Griffin: Doesn't have to. Say anything-to-anything, people lose their minds.
- [a customer picks a jar up]
- Stewie Griffin: Just so you know, this is all grass-to-bottle.
- Stewie's Customer: Ooh!
- Stewie Griffin: I know, right?
- [she puts a few jars in her purse]
- Stewie Griffin: That'll be $68.
- Stewie's Customer: [another customer] Is this a superfood?
- Stewie Griffin: Total superfood. Full of GMOs.
- Stewie's Customer: GMOs are bad.
- Stewie Griffin: No GMOs whatsoever.
- Peter Griffin: All right, time to take flight, Drone of Arcadia.
- Glenn Quagmire: Oh, Amber Tamblyn.
- Cleveland Brown: I love that show.
- Joe Swanson: Now married to David Cross.
- [the drone takes off]
- Joe Swanson: Can I have a turn? I want a turn.
- Peter Griffin: No. Hey, does Cleveland have a bald spot?
- Cleveland Brown: [covering his head] No.
- Peter Griffin: Hey, what's this do?
- [pressing a button, the drone flies up into the path of an oncoming airplane, then with its camera, looks around the neighborhood]
- Joe Swanson: Check it out, here comes a hawk.
- Peter Griffin: [catching the drone in its talons, the bird drops it on a nearby rooftop] Uh-oh.
- [the bird begins to hump it]
- Peter Griffin: What's happening?
- [watching the bird's shadow]
- Peter Griffin: AHHH, no! I don't think this is consensual!
- Joe Swanson: Look at that pervert squirrel just watching.
- Joe Swanson: [watching a Patriots game] Yeah, Brady!
- Cleveland Brown: He's awesome.
- Peter Griffin: I can't believe Gisele gets to sleep with him. I wish I was a supermodel.
- Joe Swanson: Hey, it's a commercial. Jerome, switch over to the "RedZone".
- Glenn Quagmire: Screw that, I say we put on the "BoneZone".
- Cleveland Brown: What's that?
- Glenn Quagmire: Oh, it's awesome. They show every sex scene on TV without all the boring dialogue and plot.
- Lois Griffin: That was Bonnie. She said they already sold the house behind us. Poor Mr. Seigel.
- [hearing loud party music]
- Lois Griffin: What the hell is that?
- [looking out the front window]
- Lois Griffin: Oh, God, please don't let that be our new neighbors.
- Peter Griffin: What is it?
- Lois Griffin: Some kind of crazy van with the number 87 on the side.
- Peter Griffin: [connecting the dots] 87? That's not a van, Lois, that's a party bus. Rob Gronkowski's party bus!
- Meg Griffin: Who's that?
- Peter Griffin: Only the star tight end of the New England Patriots and America's most athletic Polish.
- [running outside to meet the guys]
- Peter Griffin: Did you guys see?
- Glenn Quagmire: [naked, mid-sex, with a woman in her underwear wrapped around him] Oh, my God, that was Rob Gronkowski!
- Glenn Quagmire: [Peter's drone is stuck on the roof of a house] Peter, you've been knocking a while. I don't think anyone's in there.
- Joe Swanson: Yeah, look at all this mail. Maybe he's on vacation or something.
- Peter Griffin: [looking through a window] Oh, my God, he's dead! And his face and earlobes are missing.
- [they're startled by a cat with bloody paws jumping into the window]
- Peter Griffin: Oh, that's a relief. It's just the cat that ate his face and ears off.
- Peter Griffin: Oh, my God, you guys, having Gronk here is gonna be the best. Kind of like those years when it was just Marley and me.
- [cutaway]
- Peter Griffin: Hey, my dog's chewing up that thing I need.
- [cut to a pool party]
- Peter Griffin: Hey, my dirty dog's jumping in the neighbor's pool.
- [cut to a fancy party]
- Peter Griffin: Wait, Marley, don't shake your wet fur in the middle of this fancy party.
- [cut to a living room]
- Peter Griffin: I'm gonna lay down these work blueprints on the floor and I sure hope you don't walk across them with muddy paws.
- [the dog does so]
- Peter Griffin: Marley!
- [cut to a graveyard where Marley is buried]
- Peter Griffin: Aw, my nightmare dog is dead. Marley and me.
- Stewie Griffin: All right, since we sold out so fast, we've got to make these bees more productive, get them to make more honey.
- Brian Griffin: How are we gonna do that?
- Stewie Griffin: Steroids, Brian. This here is the same stuff that turned Barry Bonds' head into a prize-winning squash.
- Brian Griffin: Okay. Well, how much are we supposed to give them?
- Stewie Griffin: Hmm. It says this is enough for a horse, so, I don't know, how many bees is a horse?
- Brian Griffin: Well, you can't fit a horse in this box, so I'd just use the whole thing.
- Stewie Griffin: That makes sense.
- Brian Griffin: [selling Stewie's homemade honey at the farmer's market] Wow, this is great. We've only been here an hour and we're almost totally sold out.
- Stewie Griffin: Yes, I didn't see that coming. Just like Dan Cortese didn't see the end of the '90s coming.
- Rob Gronkowski: Workout room, kegerator cellar, another workout room, and over here's a room that's just got a lit candle on a bale of hay.
- Peter Griffin: I-Is that just 'cause of the danger?
- Rob Gronkowski: That's exactly why.
- Peter Griffin: My dumb wife won't let me have a room like that. Do you have a wife?
- [Gronk laughs, and he joins in nervously]
- Peter Griffin: What's going on?
- Rob Gronkowski: Let's go check out the hot tub.
- [riding down a zip line out the window]
- Rob Gronkowski: Check it out, my hot tub is filled with coffee. Grab a donut, go to town! Sponsored by Dunkin' Donuts. And the pool is filled with my favorite food: soup with little shapes in it. Sponsored by Campbell's Soup.
- Joe Swanson: Oh, alphabet soup is my favorite, too.
- Rob Gronkowski: What's a albaphet?
- Joe Swanson: Nothing. What you said is not anything.
- Rob Gronkowski: And check out the shower! Ultra Sunrise Monster Energy Drink. Sponsored by Monster Energy Drink.
- Cleveland Brown: Why do you keep saying what things are sponsored by?
- Rob Gronkowski: My manager said if I don't, I won't go to heaven. Sponsored by SMS Audio Sweatproof Sport Headphones.
- Glenn Quagmire: Ah, crap. It's almost 3:00. I gotta get out of here.
- Peter Griffin: For what? It's Sunday.
- Glenn Quagmire: Eh, the airline's making us all attend a seminar about what to do if someone flies a drone into your flight path.
- Joe Swanson: Yeah, I hear that kind of obnoxious behavior is very big right now in the dangerous idiot community.
- Peter Griffin: Really? I didn't see that in the newsletter this month. Just a big article about how to tailgate a speeding fire truck to get places faster.
- [cut to him following a fire truck in his car]
- Peter Griffin: [giggling] Wait 'til they get to the golf course and find out there's no fire.
- Peter Griffin: [bringing housewarming gifts for Gronk] So, what'd you get him, Cleveland?
- Cleveland Brown: Oreo middles.
- Rob Gronkowski: [answering the door] Whoa, four standing dogs?
- Glenn Quagmire: No, we're people, sir.
- Peter Griffin: Um, Mr. Gronk? I'm Peter Griffin. I live in the house behind yours. We wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood.
- Rob Gronkowski: Awesome!
- [taking Peter's gift of scraped-off Dorito powder, he throws it on the ground]
- Glenn Quagmire: Ha-ha, he spiked it!
- Peter Griffin: I was hoping he would do that.
- Cleveland Brown: My eyes!
- Brian Griffin: [learning Stewie is raising bees to harvest honey] Mm, well, I gotta say, you're good at it. You know, you could probably sell this stuff.
- Stewie Griffin: Really? You think it's that good?
- Brian Griffin: Yeah, plus it's local, it's straight from the hive. People at farmer's markets would go nuts for this. You know, you could probably charge, like, 20, 30 dollars a jar.
- Stewie Griffin: Oh, now I'm excited about this, Brian. I feel like an eighth-grader who just had sex.
- Eighth Grader: [cut to a middle school bathroom] So, you go all the way?
- Eighth Grader: Oh, yeah.
- Eighth Grader: I'm gonna need some proof.
- Eighth Grader: Hmm, how can I prove it?
- [taking out a pair of briefs]
- Eighth Grader: Maybe with Father O'Leary's briefs!
- Eighth Grader: Oh!
- Eighth Grader: The king.
- Father O'Leary: [sitting on a toilet in a stall, crying] He said he loved me.
- Stewie Griffin: So, Brian, this is my hive. Now, how many bees do you think are in here?
- Brian Griffin: I don't know, a... a million?
- Stewie Griffin: No, it's 4,000. Now that seems like nothing because of your idiot million guess.
- Glenn Quagmire: Nowadays, any moron can just order a drone online.
- Peter Griffin: [his interest piqued] Oh.
- Glenn Quagmire: There's no regulation.
- Peter Griffin: [more interested] Oh!
- Glenn Quagmire: And most of them have cameras so people can spy on whoever they want and invade their privacy.
- Peter Griffin: [even more interested] OH!
- Joe Swanson: [he takes out his phone] Peter, are you ordering a drone right now?
- Lois Griffin: What the hell are you doing?
- Peter Griffin: I wanted to bring over something to welcome Gronk to the neighborhood, so I scraped all the cool ranch off of 15 bags of Doritos.
- Lois Griffin: You're bringing him a bowl of powder?
- Peter Griffin: Yeah, I thought he could eat it by the fistful or rub it on his balls.
- Lois Griffin: Peter, I don't know what you're so excited about. Rob Gronkowski is probably the worst neighbor we could ask for. You know he's gonna be partying day and night. It's not like it's that tasty piece of ass, Julian Edelman. Now, there's a Patriot you can get excited about. I know he's a wide receiver, but if he's giving, I'm taking. I'll take it all. I'll take it wherever.
- [taking a Pawtucket Patriot out of the fridge, she shakes it and opens it over herself to cool down]
- Lois Griffin: Ah! Anyway, go suck up to your big, dumb monster. I'll be here hooking the G to thoughts of Edelman.
- Stewie Griffin: All right, now, if you're going to sell honey at the farmer's market, you need to practice. So you be the salesman, and I'll be the customer.
- [taking out a fake mustache on a stick]
- Stewie Griffin: Ooh, what do we have here?
- Brian Griffin: Uh, honey. Like the sign says.
- Stewie Griffin: I find your attitude cavalier. Can I speak to your manager?
- Brian Griffin: Stewie, come on.
- Stewie Griffin: [appearing behind him, putting an apron on] I'm sorry, is there a problem here? I was just in the back and I heard a commotion.
- Brian Griffin: How do we have a back?
- Stewie Griffin: [switching costumes] I simply came here to enquire about honey, and your employee spoke to me loudly and with profanity.
- Brian Griffin: Stewie, this is ridiculous.
- Stewie Griffin: [switching back and forth] Brian, please, I trust that this handsome young customer knows what he's talking about. "Oh, my, and I thought only bees pour on the honey."
- Brian Griffin: I'm going inside.
- Stewie Griffin: So, are you from around here? "No, I'm just in town for the John Singer Sargent exhibit at the museum." Really? I've been looking for an excuse to go again. "Well, looks like I won't need that audio tour." Great. Give me one minute. Let me text my fiancee. "Your what?"
- Rob Gronkowski: Grovers, you made it! Here, have a beer.
- Peter Griffin: Thanks. Hey, Gronk, you know, there's something I always wanted to ask you. When you know you have single coverage, do you give a hand signal to Brady or is it just eye contact?
- Rob Gronkowski: I don't know. Wanna see me dance?
- Peter Griffin: [Gronk starts dancing] Well, no, I ask because sometimes you're being covered by a little guy, and then you and Brady'll look at each other and... a-am... am I supposed to touch you? What-what am I... what am I doing here?
- Rob Gronkowski: Oh, I'm sorry, bro. What was the question?
- Peter Griffin: I-I just wanna know if you and Brady have, like, a... like, a secret hand signal or something.
- Rob Gronkowski: Whoa, that is top secret, but lean in and I'll tell you.
- Peter Griffin: [a la Jar Jar Binks, as Gronk belches in his face] How rude.
- Rob Gronkowski: What's up, butt munchers?
- Peter Griffin: That's us! He called us butt munchers! We're butt munchers!
- Rob Gronkowski: All right, time to Gronk a dump in my new house.
- Peter Griffin: Oh. My. God! Our new neighbor is Gronk.
- Lou Ferrigno: Hey, I'm your new mailman. Former star of "The Incredible Hulk," Lou Ferrigno.
- Peter Griffin: On any other day, that would be so exciting. Please give me my mail and go.
- Stewie Griffin: Ah, Brian, you finally made it. I'm having a tea party. Sit down.
- Brian Griffin: Yeah, you texted me, like, 80 times. Look, Stewie, I don't have time to sip air and pretend to eat a wooden hamburger patty.
- Stewie Griffin: Yeah? Tell me why you don't have time.
- Brian Griffin: [unable to think of something] All right, I have time.
- Stewie Griffin: And there's nothing pretend about this. Real tea, real milk, and the best honey you'll ever taste in your whole life.
- Brian Griffin: [taking a sip] Wow, this *is* good. Where'd you buy the honey?
- Stewie Griffin: I didn't. I'm raising bees.
- Brian Griffin: You're raising bees? Like... like a beekeeper?
- Stewie Griffin: Yup. Mom missed soccer registration, so this is my weekends.
- Peter Griffin: Uh, listen, Gronk, um, it's getting kind of late. Don't you think maybe it's time to call it a night?
- Rob Gronkowski: Yeah, sure. Hey, you ever seen a nard explode?
- Peter Griffin: A-A what? A wha... a nard? I don't... i-is that something on the Internet? Uh, 'cause I...
- [Gronk takes the towel off his shoulder, twirls it into a rope, and snaps Peter in the groin with it]
- Peter Griffin: AHH! Damn it, what the hell?
- Rob Gronkowski: [he and his guests laugh] Come on, don't get mad, bro. I was just kidding.
- Peter Griffin: You were kidding? What was the joke?
- Rob Gronkowski: This was!
- Peter Griffin: [he does it again] Oh, damn it, you hit the seam!
- [Gronk and his friends laugh again]
- Peter Griffin: You know what? You're a jerk, Gronk! That's it, I'm getting rid of that bastard. Just like I helped kick the British out of America.
- [cut to colonial America]
- Peter Griffin: This tyranny shall not stand! For without liberty...
- [Gronk runs in and snaps his groin with a towel]
- Peter Griffin: Ah, crap, he's even in the cutaways!
- [groaning in pain]
- Peter Griffin: Just... just go to commercial. I'm gonna squat here and hold onto this bench.
- Rob Gronkowski: You guys are bad fighters.
- Joe Swanson: That's his third sub.
- Rob Gronkowski: [Stewie's beehive lands on him] Oh, cool! Honey rain!
- [a bee flies by]
- Rob Gronkowski: Ahh, oh, my God, is that a bee? You have bees here?
- Peter Griffin: Uh, yeah, it's the world.
- Rob Gronkowski: [Stewie's bees swarm at him] Holy crap! There's a ton of them! Dad, start up the party bus! We're moving!
- Gordon Gronkowski: Bees?
- Rob Gronkowski: Yeah, bees! And they're showing blitz! We gotta leave on two!
- [he, his brothers, and their dad load onto their bus and leave, the swarm of bees following them]
- Joe Swanson: You think their Wi-Fi is "Vag-Town"? Yeah, that's probably them. Look at that, no password.
- Peter Griffin: [woken by one of Gronk's parties] God, they're still going?
- Lois Griffin: Peter, this is exactly what I told you would happen! Not so much fun anymore, is it?
- Peter Griffin: [the loud music stops] Oh, thank God, maybe they're wrapping it up.
- [another song starts, followed by a cannon firing]
- Peter Griffin: Damn it, I can't take anymore! He is the worst neighbor ever. You won't believe what he did yesterday.
- [cut to Peter watering his front lawn]
- Rob Gronkowski: [down the street] Hey, Grover, catch!
- [he throws what looks to be a football, but then his party bus lands on Peter]
- Brian Griffin: God, look at all the honey the bees made! Those steroids were a great idea, Stewie.
- [a bee buzzes in]
- Brian Griffin: Hey, look, that bee is trying to get our honey.
- Stewie Griffin: Okay, Mr. Bee, we'll give you the employee discount. After all, you...
- [the bee manages to pick a jar up]
- Stewie Griffin: Ahhh!
- Brian Griffin: Holy crap! That thing just lifted a whole jar of honey! Oh, God, do you think that's one of our steroid bees?
- Stewie Griffin: [another bee, muscularly buffed up, flies in] Well, this one's wearing a hoodie as a shirt. So, yeah, I think these are ours.
- Brian Griffin: Stewie, I have a bad feeling abo...
- [the jar drops]
- Brian Griffin: Oh, God, it just ate the other bee!
- Stewie Griffin: Okay, so a few of them had a bad reaction to...
- [hearing buzzing]
- Stewie Griffin: Oh, crap.
- Brian Griffin: [being attacked by a swarm of Stewie's bees] I think maybe giving those bees steroids was a bad idea.
- Stewie Griffin: [a bee lands on the windshield] Turn on the wipers!
- [as Brian does, the bee manages to catch it and break it off]
- Tom Tucker: Coming up, yesterday's brisket.
- [he belches]
- Tom Tucker: But first, breaking news: Rob Gronkowski has been suspended from the Patriots following a failed drug test that showed evidence of steroids in his system. The star athlete claims he has no idea how the banned substance got into his body.
- Peter Griffin: Oh, no way!
- Meg Griffin: That's terrible.
- Tom Tucker: When pressed for further comment, Mr. Gronkowski said simply, "Grover, go long."
- Peter Griffin: Uh-oh.
- [Gronk's party bus crashes through the ceiling and crushes the Griffins]
- Glenn Quagmire: You sure this is gonna work, Peter?
- Peter Griffin: Absolutely. Gronk went to the University of Arizona, and everyone who went to the University of Arizona believes leprechauns are real. And since Cleveland already owns a green suit and a top hat...
- Cleveland Brown: This is my Easter clothes.
- [he rings the doorbell]
- Rob Gronkowski: [answering the door] Whoa, a leprechaun!
- Peter Griffin: Say the thing.
- Cleveland Brown: [with an Irish brogue] Top o' the morning to you, Mr. Gronkowski. Have you any interest in a pot of gold? All you have to do is move to Tallahassee!
- Rob Gronkowski: Wait a minute, this is just a disguise!
- Cleveland Brown: [getting his mustache pulled off] Ahh, son of a bitch!