- Lucifer Morningstar: Dad's all-powerful.
- Axara: Works in government?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Mmm. Rules the universe.
- Axara: Freaking politicians.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I am not afraid. I've just realized I've been a tad myopic lately. Why not spread the love? I mean, everyone deserves a little Lucifer.
- Chloe Decker: How generous of you.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [opening a door] Thank you very much. After me.
- Charlotte: I feel so good. It's like I'm floating. Although that might be the three gimlets I had at lunch.
- Dan Espinoza: Now everything's coming up Dan. No, seriously, man, I'm happy. You know, I'm--l'm ready to start dating. Hell, you and I are even friends.
- [Pierce gives him a look]
- Dan Espinoza: Friendlier.
- Ella Lopez: [Lucifer gives her a t-shirt] "World's Greatest. Forensic Scientist"? My gosh. That is so sweet. Wait. Did I miss my birthday?
- Ella Lopez: It's a compliment box. I went around the precinct and asked everyone to write a positive little note about you.
- Marcus Pierce: Why?
- Ella Lopez: So that whenever you're feeling down, you can just pull one out, and it'll perk you right up. Like, maybe now would be a good time.
- [Pulls out a note]
- Ella Lopez: "Pierce has nice arms." Well, agreed. You sure do.
- [Takes out another note]
- Ella Lopez: "The lieutenant has really great arms." Right again. Two arms, two compliments.
- [Takes out a third note]
- Ella Lopez: "Pierce...
- [Looks at note, tries to improvise something on the spot]
- Ella Lopez: "Is... wicked smart, so funny, generous and amazing." Now that is a compliment.
- Marcus Pierce: It says I have really nice arms, doesn't it?
- Ella Lopez: Nah, nah, 'cause that'd be really awkward and weird, you and me here talking about a third arm.
- Ella Lopez: [On Axara's twitter] Well, I've gone through them all, and on a scale of #ILoveYouAxara to #IWantToLiveInYourSpleen, there's, like, a zillion suspects.
- Lucifer Morningstar: A zillion and one if you count me.
- Chloe Decker: You weren't even aware of her until this case.
- [Lucifer scoffs]
- Chloe Decker: Okay, name your favorite song.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Well, um, there's so many...
- Axara: You can make yourself useful. Unless that's just a prop.
- [Gestures to his piano]
- Lucifer Morningstar: Prop? Please. Mozart, Liberace, Elton.
- Axara: Who?
- Lucifer Morningstar: All the greats were my pupils.
- Chloe Decker: If there's even the slightest hint that she is unsafe, your duties are revoked.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [scoffs] Right.
- Chloe Decker: What?
- Lucifer Morningstar: You said "dooties."
- Axara: You can't let anyone come in between you and the "things" you're passionate about in this life, or it ain't worth living.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I'm sorry, but you'd have to tie me down with steel chains to have sex with you.
- Axara: I'd be up for that.
- Lucifer Morningstar: No! What... it wasn't a suggestion!
- Dan Espinoza: Beard-to-misery quotient. It's a science, man. After my divorce, I went for the old Walter White. Whatever you do, do not go full Hagrid. Kenny Rogers, tops.
- Axara: if I hid under a rock every time there was an issue, I'd still be doing bar mitzvahs.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Also, you'd be under a rock. Most unpleasant.
- Mazikeen: You know, despite all the books you've read, all the degrees on your wall, you forgot the one rule that matters. Hos before bros!
- Axara: So you're gonna be my bodyguard? Are you even a real cop?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Consultant, actually.
- Lucifer Morningstar: That whole "mark of Cain" thing was so dreary, so nihilistic. There are far better ways to spend my time.
- Linda Martin: Oh?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Yes. Well, I could brew my own artisanal beer. Take a nude painting class. Buy that pet shark I've always wanted.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Now, I've always had an interest in the personal protection business, Rob.
- Bob: Bob.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Bob, right. Is that short for "Robert"?
- Bob: No.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Fascinating. It's lovely getting to know you like this. Your hopes, your dreams.
- [Claps his arm]
- Lucifer Morningstar: Been working out as well.
- Chloe Decker: Are you coming?
- Lucifer Morningstar: No, I'm not really interested in you and what you're doing. I think I'm just gonna stay here and chat to my new friend, Rob.
- Bob: *Bob*.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Bob. Right. Bob. Big fan of old Bobby here.
- [Looks at the sky]
- Lucifer Morningstar: In fact, if someone were wondering about my list of favorite people, Bob might just be at the top.
- Bob: Really?
- Lucifer Morningstar: I love sex.
- Axara: What a coincidence. Me, too.
- Lucifer Morningstar: But, and this may be a first... I'm really not in the mood.
- Patrick Manning: [Dressed as Axara] It was craycray at the Hideaway. Everyone wants a piece of Axara 2.0. You wouldn't believe the obsessive wannabes.
- Donovan McCann: Sad.
- Patrick Manning: It's sad.
- Amenadiel: [Looking at Lucifer and Chloe] You got to have faith because life can surprise you. Now, if my brother, the Devil, can have that...
- Marcus Pierce: Then maybe I can, too.
- Ella Lopez: [Reading suicide note] "Axara's art celebrates life. I tarnished it with death. have no right to stay in her world. I lived for Axara. Now I die for her. Benny."
- Chloe Decker: Wow. I hope that no one ever loves me that much.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I'm trying to take my focus off someone very dear to me.
- [Looks at the sky]
- Lucifer Morningstar: But... a friend, actually. Well, no, indeed, more a coworker.
- Axara: [Burning sage] After what happened to Jill, I'm smudging my space, and my heart.
- Chloe Decker: And my lungs.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Poor Pauline.
- Chloe Decker: Pauline?
- Lucifer Morningstar: My friend who works the intake desk at the precinct. I'm helping her through a bad breakup. We've grown quite close since yesterday.
- Chloe Decker: If you need to "reverseOprah" me just to feel less afraid, then by all means, knock yourself out.
- Amenadiel: I can't allow you to defy my father or drag my brother into one of your schemes to remove your mark. This ends now.
- Marcus Pierce: Okay.
- Amenadiel: [Surprised Pierce agreed so quickly] ... Really?
- Marcus Pierce: I made a mistake. I was wrong. 'Cause here I am, alive and well. Well, alive and miserable,