The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Sibling Realignment (2018)
Jerry O'Connell: George Cooper, Jr.
Photos
Quotes
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Sheldon Cooper : I'm trying to invite my stupid brother to my wedding, and he's avoiding my calls.
Raj Koothrappali : You don't know he's avoiding your calls.
[Sheldon dials his phone and puts the call on speakerphone]
George Cooper Jr. : Hey, you've reached George Cooper. Please leave a message, unless this is Sheldon again, in which case please try me on my other number, 1-800-SUCKIT.
Sheldon Cooper : See? And I know that's not a real number because why would it be toll-free?
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George Cooper Jr. : After all my sacrifices, guess which kid my mom is the most proud of.
Leonard Hofstadter : If it makes you feel any better, my mom's most proud of Sheldon, too.
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George Cooper Jr. : You're my baby brother, Sheldon. I know life has been hard for you, but that doesn't mean it's been easy for the rest of us.
Sheldon Cooper : I suppose I didn't think about how it was for everyone else.
George Cooper Jr. : No, that's all right. I know you didn't.
Sheldon Cooper : I'm sorry.
George Cooper Jr. : Thank you.
Sheldon Cooper : And it would mean a lot to me to have my big brother at my wedding.
George Cooper Jr. : I wouldn't miss it.
Leonard Hofstadter : [choking up] Is it me, or did we just patch a tire?
Sheldon Cooper : He said "never patch." Do you even listen?
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George Cooper Jr. : What the hell are you doing here?
Sheldon Cooper : Hello, Georgie.
George Cooper Jr. : It's just George now.
Sheldon Cooper : Fine, George. No, I don't like it. Georgie.
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George Cooper Jr. : Hold up. I-I'm confused. You didn't want me at your wedding, but now that mom won't come, you want me there.
Sheldon Cooper : I know you don't hear this a lot, but that is exactly right. Good job.
Leonard Hofstadter : Not helping, Sheldon.
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George Cooper Jr. : You want me at your wedding, all you gotta do is ask nicely.
Sheldon Cooper : Georgie.
George Cooper Jr. : George.
Sheldon Cooper : [groaning] I would like you at my wedding.
George Cooper Jr. : Thank you, Sheldon. That is so nice to hear. But I would rather swallow a pregnant wildcat and crap out a litter of kittens.
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George Cooper Jr. : I see you haven't changed one bit.
Sheldon Cooper : Thank you. That is a nice thing to say.
Leonard Hofstadter : [offering a handshake] Hey, I'm Leonard. I'm here for-for no reason.
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George Cooper Jr. : What do you want, Sheldon?
Sheldon Cooper : Why aren't you returning my phone calls?
George Cooper Jr. : You're supposed to be the smart one. You figure it out.
Leonard Hofstadter : He's not that kind of smart. You might want to give him a hint.
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George Cooper Jr. : We haven't talked in over ten years, and now that you need something, you think you can just show up at my store? Well, let's just drop everything to accomodate Sheldon.
Sheldon Cooper : Nice try, but I am not a gullible little boy anymore. I can recognize sarcasm.
George Cooper Jr. : Okay. You're right. I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
[sarcastic]
George Cooper Jr. : Tell me what you need. Your wish is my command.
Sheldon Cooper : That's better. Thank you.
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George Cooper Jr. : If you are here about Sheldon's wedding, don't bother.
Leonard Hofstadter : Come on. I-I know you two have your differences.
George Cooper Jr. : You mean pretty much everything about us?
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, not everything. You're both tall, you have the same last name. Maybe I shouldn't have started this like it was a list.
George Cooper Jr. : You have no idea what you are talking about.
Leonard Hofstadter : Ooh, there. That-that was very Sheldon.
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George Cooper Jr. : Look, I mean, I always looked out for him at school. I drove him everywhere. I apologized to people when he was rude.
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah. I've done all that. I've also removed all the red balloons from his Lucky Charms because they weren't "Irish enough."
George Cooper Jr. : All right. So you know what I'm talking about. And has he ever thanked you?
Leonard Hofstadter : Not in so many words, or any words.
George Cooper Jr. : Would it kill him to actually say it?
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George Cooper Jr. : Leonard, you know how I got the money to open up my first store? I busted my ass for it, 'cause all the extra money that we had had to go to Sheldon so he could go to college and he could go study in Germany. And do you know what he's never said to me?
Leonard Hofstadter : Danke schon?
[seeing George's confusion]
Leonard Hofstadter : It's, uh, "thank you" in German.
George Cooper Jr. : Do you need me to sit on your head?
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George Cooper Jr. : Leonard, you want a beer?
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, I would love a beer.
George Cooper Jr. : [handing him a bottle] There you go.
Leonard Hofstadter : Thanks. Can you open it for me?
George Cooper Jr. : No, it's a twist-off.
Leonard Hofstadter : I know.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Sheldon, you need to apologize to your brother.
Sheldon Cooper : [condescending] I'm sorry?
Leonard Hofstadter : [pointing at George] Yes. Like that, but nicer, and that way.
Sheldon Cooper : I have nothing to apologize for.
George Cooper Jr. : I told you this was a bad idea. Sometimes you can't patch a tire. You just got to buy a new one. Actually, that's always the case. Never patch; buy new.
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Sheldon Cooper : While I appreciate your folksy tire wisdom, I don't appreciate what you're putting mom through.
George Cooper Jr. : What would know about what mom's been through? You were never home.
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, this is good. Get it all out.
Sheldon Cooper : Not now!
George Cooper Jr. : Shut up!
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George Cooper Jr. : You went away to college after dad died. Who do you think took care of everything?
Sheldon Cooper : Mom did. Mom always took care of everything.
George Cooper Jr. : Mom was a mess. Missy was a dumb teenager. I had to look after both of 'em.
Sheldon Cooper : I talked to mom all the time. If she was upset, she would have told me.
George Cooper Jr. : She was protecting you, you idiot, just like everyone always does.
Sheldon Cooper : If things were bad, then why didn't you tell me?
George Cooper Jr. : Because I was protecting you, too.
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George Cooper Jr. : [on the phone with a customer] Listen, I hear you. I know they're pricey, but these are the Dallas Cowboys of tires, okay? And we're talking the Troy Aikman Cowboys, not that pretty boy Tony Romo. All right! Good call. You won't regret it.
[hanging up]
George Cooper Jr. : Boom!
Leonard Hofstadter : Wow. That was impressive.
George Cooper Jr. : Yeah, well, it's easy when you love your product, and hate Tony Romo.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Look, I-I'm sure he was not the easiest brother to have, but it wasn't easy for him, either with you picking on him all the time.
George Cooper Jr. : [with a derisive laugh] Picking on him? Is that what he told you?
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, what about the time you threw away his Halloween costume?
George Cooper Jr. : Well, yeah, 'cause he was gonna dress as some girl scientist.
Leonard Hofstadter : Madam Curie?
George Cooper Jr. : Oh, I didn't know she was a madam. Come on. He was still gonna get beat up for wearing that dress.
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, didn't you sit on his head while he tried to watch "Star Trek"?
George Cooper Jr. : Well, yeah, but that was hilarious.
Leonard Hofstadter : That is pretty hilarious, yeah.
