- Laurel Castillo: [watching Asher leave] Is his butt as nice as it looks?
- Michaela Pratt: Oh, it's amazing. Wait, what?
- Laurel Castillo: Sorry. My OB got me off my antidepressants, and I want to hump everything.
- Oliver Hampton: So much for trying to hide the fact that your dad's gay. He and Ted have seen, like, eight musicals in the past five days.
- Connor Walsh: That's Ted. He's pretty much the only thing that makes my dad gay.
- Oliver Hampton: No, I think this paisley shirt's pretty gay.
- Connor Walsh: Again, Ted.
- Laurel Castillo: Did you see this?
- Bonnie Winterbottom: You're late.
- Laurel Castillo: This is insane. The guy who covered up Wes' murder can't be Attorney General. He should be in jail.
- Nate Lahey: So should you. Smart people around here keep their heads down. That goes for the both of you.
- Laurel Castillo: [he leaves] How are you okay with this?
- Bonnie Winterbottom: Because I'm an adult who needs a job. Now go do yours.