Gavin McInnes: Boy in the Streets

Quotes 

• Ebenezer YouTube : Young lad, do you know that iMac hanging in the Apple Store window?

  Boy in the Streets : You mean that bloody huge one that's as big as me?

  Ebenezer YouTube : That's the one. An intelligent, remarkable young lad. Go and fetch it for me, bring it to the Cratchit house, and I'll give you a shilling.

  Boy in the Streets : Och! Piss off! Those things are like three thousand quid.

  Ebenezer YouTube : Bring it in thirty minutes and I'll give you half-a-crown.

  Boy in the Streets : That's not even close!

  Ebenezer YouTube : Run along now.

  Boy in the Streets : How am I meant to do that? I have no money. Look at me. I'm a wee lad. I'm a tiny bearded boy with no money.

  Ebenezer YouTube : Ha! A lovely lad.

  Boy in the Streets : It's your only hope. Throw me a credit card. I'll blind trust it and hope I come back. That's all you got me.

• Boy in the Streets : [taking Ebenezer's credit card]  That'll do it. But just to be on the total up and up, mate, I'm gonna get myself something with that.

  Ebenezer YouTube : What was that?

  Boy in the Streets : I'm gonna get... well, not that it's any of your business, but here's the deal. I'm gonna get me a Bluetooth keypad and one of those Magic Trackpads. I like them.

  Ebenezer YouTube : A keypad and Magic Trackpad, then. On your way.

  Boy in the Streets : All right, I'm on my way. I'll be back in a bit. No idea how I'm gonna carry it.

  Ebenezer YouTube : What a remarkable lad.