- Boris Badenov: Okay, Fearless Leader. There is moose. How do we get him to lead us to Kirward Derby?
- Fearless Leader: Very simple, Badenov. We simply brainwash him.
- Narrator: Sure enough, the hapless moose was taken into a small room and left there with three expert brainwashers. Hours went by and finally the door swung open.
- Fearless Leader: Moose is brainwashed, yes?
- Brainwasher: Moose is brainwashed, no!
- Fearless Leader: Why is this?
- Brainwasher: Not enough brain to wash.
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: I sure feel clean-headed, though.
- [Rocky calls for Bullwinkle, who starts to come out of Boris's hypnotic trance]
- Fearless Leader: Quick! He's coming out of it!
- Boris Badenov: Listen, Moose. When you wake up you will look for the Kirward Derby. The Kirward Derby. Do you understand?
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: No, but I'll do it anyway.
- [Rocky finds Bullwinkle, who's still in a hypnotic trance and has his eyes closed]
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Bullwinkle! Bullwinkle, it's you!
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: It is?
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Don't you recognize me?
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: I don't even recognize *me*!
- Rocket J. Squirrel: I'm Rocky!
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: You sure are.
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Don't you know me?
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: The voice is familiar, but I don't place the goggles.
- Rocket J. Squirrel: I'm Rocky, your pal. We've been buddies for years!
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: What have you done for me lately?
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Oh, come out of it, Bullwinkle!
- [Rocky snaps his fingers and Bullwinkle awakens from his trance, his eyes open]
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: Rocky! It's you!
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Boy! You looked like you were in a trance!
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: Yeah, but don't I always?
- Rocket J. Squirrel: Something awful funny's going on in Peaceful Valley, Bullwinkle.
- Bullwinkle J. Moose: Really? I haven't heard a laugh yet.
- Narrator: And Bullwinkle, still under Boris's control, began to hunt for a hat. And the first place he went to, of course, was a hat store.
- Fearless Leader: So, that's where we find the Kirward Derby, eh, Badenov?
- Boris Badenov: But...
- Fearless Leader: Dozens of our smartest secret agents have combed the world for that derby. What chance do you think a stupid moose has of finding it in an ordinary hat store?
- Boris Badenov: Not very good, eh?
- Fearless Leader: No chance at all, Mr. Not-So-Hotshot Badenov!
- Fearless Leader: Badenov, we must get moose under our control.
- Boris Badenov: Easy, boss man. Looky here.
- [pulls out kit]
- Fearless Leader: What's that?
- Boris Badenov: Beautiful Dreamer Hypnotism Kit.
- Fearless Leader: How does it work?
- Boris Badenov: First, I use little daisy buzzer to get his attention.
- [presses buzzer]
- Boris Badenov: Then I use whirling disc to focus his eyes.
- [spins disc, then puts on glasses]
- Boris Badenov: Then is put on special goo-goo glasses. Look deep into his eyes and say, "Sleep. You are going to sleep." Pretty good, huh, boss?
- [Fearless Leader stands completely still in a trance]
- Boris Badenov: Boss? Boss? Fearless Leader? Hey! Wake up!
- Fearless Leader: [snaps out of his trance] Hmm? Hmm? What were you saying?
- Boris Badenov: It's my hypnotism ki...
- Fearless Leader: It will never work!