- Marjorie: [Tammy's going to move in with Marjorie] There's one thing, how do you feel about cats?
- Tammy: I've always wanted one!
- Bonnie: Great, now you have eight.
- Marjorie: Nine, a stray wandered in the night Victor died. I'm not saying it's him but... it's him!
- Tammy: I have 9 cats and a puzzle club! My life is awesome!
- Christy: [finds a large dowdy dress] Whoa, did you cross the prairie in a covered wagon with this?
- Wendy: [laughing] What were you thinking?
- Jill: [quietly] That's my maternity dress.
- [they stop laughing]
- Jill: I was going to wear it to my baby shower, before I miscarried. This isn't a closet, it's a museum of all my failures.
- Christy: Or... a museum of all the things that made you what you are now.
- Jill: A divorced, childless failure?
- Christy: I was going to say a strong, sober woman with a chandelier in her closet.
- Tammy: You know, Marjorie, you don't seem like the kind of person who's been to prison.
- Marjorie: Thanks to 39 years of being sober, and these glasses on a chain.
- Tammy: What were you in for?
- Marjorie: Bank robbery.
- Tammy: You robbed a bank?
- Marjorie: The money went to a worthy political cause... and I really wanted to see Steppenwolf.
- Tammy: At least you actually had a reason, I just robbed an Outback Steakhouse because I was high, *and* it was an Outback Steakhouse.
- Jill: You don't know what it's like to still be such a train wreck.
- Christy: What are you talking about? Train wreck is my middle name. I'm in two 12-step programs.
- Jill: Yeah, but you never relapsed. You don't know what it's like to throw away 3 years of sobriety. That's why I shop so much, to keep myself distracted. I mean, leather pants, who the hell am I, Pat Benatar?
- Wendy: Ooh, I love her!
- Christy: Why didn't you share any of this at the meetings?
- Jill: Because I was embarrassed. You two have your lives on track, I don't have anything going on.