Change Your Image
Gez_Medinger
Reviews
Timeline (2003)
Awful, awful, awful
Oh my god. This film is terrible. It's so bad that even giving it my time to describe how bad it is is really a huge and unnecessary waste of my time. Just about everything that can be bad about this film is... starting with the truly abysmal screenplay adaptation from the book, gruesome directing from Donner (how did he ever make Lethal Weapon on this evidence?!), awful awful ham acting from just about everyone but Butler, and a dismal clichéd score that almost made me asphyxiate myself with the remote control in order to make it stop.
$80m? Please someone tell me it's not true. A truly terrifying example of what happens when the studio are determined to make a cookie cutter that they think will make a few quid. Thank god it tanked, let's pray it taught a few people to actually read the screenplay before they make the film next time.
Trinity (2003)
Phew. I'm still alive. Almost lost it there.
Nicely shot, well lit and great music. I'd love to write some more positives, but I'm struggling to find them. I think the script is mainly at fault - it disobeys most of the screenwriting rules (fair enough if the final product works, not if it bores you to tears) and doesn't offer the viewer enough to hold their interest. At the end of the day, there aren't many films you can return to after taking a leak and not realise that's it's still paused for 10 seconds.
Red Surf (1989)
Truly, really, abysmally awful
Holy crap Batman! What are these other comments all about? This is quite possibly one of the worst films ever made. I'm not kidding. If you compare this film to Moontrap, you;ll find both are horrifically inept, but at least Moontrap has (unintentional) comedy to stand it apart. This film has absolutely nothing (spare George Clooney in an early role) to recommend it. Everything about it is apalling. The script - dire. The direction - fabulously inept. The editing- woeful. Everything is truly, truly bad. I'm not just speaking from the position of some uninformed punter either. I'm a film director, producer and editor myself, so I at least have some idea of what makes a competent film. (For reference, bandwagon as it may seem, see the Matrix as THE example of excellent action film-making) So to sum-up. Recently I saw Russian Ark at the cinema. A technical tour de force, to be sure, but one of the least entertaining pieces of cinema I've ever seen. I wanted to sever my own head half way through. But at least it had some merit. It was a huge technical achievement. Red Surf is equally head-severingly dull, but it has NOTHING to recommend it ( I take back George's early appearance- he has nothing to work with). This film will make you want to rip your own eyeballs out rather than sit through it. You have been warned. Good luck.
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
Good, very good, but not as good as the original.
It seems to me like there are some fairly inarticulate and unconsidered comments here on this film, so I'll do my best to give a balanced opinion where others just fawn or moan.
Blimey, it's difficult to know where to start though with this film. My first thoughts upon leaving the cinema were "**** me that was cool, but what actually happened?"
With a bit of talking to others who saw it and after looking on the discussion boards here, I have a better idea of what the Wachowski brothers were trying to do with Reloaded, but anyway you look at it, it is certainly not as accessible as the first film, nor does it have as much as a story.
That's not to say it doesn't have a story, it has about 12 - but that's part of the problem. It all just seems a bit of a mess, where you were in no doubt about the first film being an almost flawless exercise of story telling and action film-making. If you were to see Reloaded without having seen the original, I'm not sure you'd understand anything at all.
I suspect this might well be one of those films you really get to like second time around - there's a whole heap of clues, hidden meanings and levels of understanding to get to grips with, which are really all too much to take in the first time.
I can't help that feel that in terms of sequels, this felt like a bit of a cross between the epic expansion of The Empire Strikes Back, and the confusion of
Highlander 2. Don't get me wrong, it's more like TESB than H2, but certainly some of the mystery and sense of discovery from the first film has been lost.
The Good Thief (2002)
Disappointing. Good last quarter can't quite redeem it.
What went wrong with the first hour and a half of this film? I don't really know. I found myself trying to work out whether the script was bad or whether the execution of the script was bad. I guess either way the responsibility is left with Neil Jordan. On reflection I think much of the dialogue was poor, the editing wasn't great and the story itself couldn't fill the time that was asked of it. So the film muddles along, not making much sense, and leaves you really quite bored. Much has been made of Nick Nolte's performance but (as much as I love him) I couldn't really see why -not that he was at fault, but his character didnt develop or really have any depth whatsoever. The same was true of most of the other characters in the film too. I actually thought the girl was OK. At least she looked good in her pants.
To be honest I'm rambling off here like the film. A couple of points though - is it me or did the scene where Nolte picks up the girl from the side of the road seem totally unnatural? And how does Nolte's sidekick just get away with murder without even going to San Remo?!
So there you have it. It saddens me to say it, but Daredevil is a better film than this. And that's coming from someone who would rather see an independent film over a studio film 9 times out of 10.
Hijacked: Flight 285 (1996)
Don't believe them. Its dreadful.
First of all, completely ignore the other comments here. This film is BAD. Trust me. The direction is limp, the script embarrassing, the sets flimsy, and I haven't even got to the actors yet. Anthony Michael Hall will always be remembered for The Breakfast Club and Weird Science - he's OK at being a geeky teen, but a menacing hijacker? He's about as intimidating as my pants. And then there's Ally Sheedy. Perhaps she's had more of a career than Anthony, but that doesn't mean she's a good actor. To be fair though, its not like she has much to work with here.
OK, the film. Its like Turbulence v Passenger 57, except made for £2.50. If you want to watch a cheesy Hollywood airplane film that actually creates some tension, go and watch Executive Decision. At least you get to see Steven Seagal get creamed.
Moontrap (1988)
This film is amazing
Well first let me qualify that statement slightly. This film is
amazingly....bad. But somehow it's also just... amazing.
By any standards of normal viewing, the acting is atrocious,
the special effects are...abysmal, the script..dreadful, and
the plot....well words fail me.
But somehow I kinda like it. I don't know why.
But if I were you I would be prepared to get to the end of the
film and get that strange feeling that you could have spent
the last 90 minutes more profitably. Like by banging your
head against a wall.
The Yards (2000)
Tries to be profound, but doesn't quite make it
Whilst perusing the DVD section of my local video shop, my eyes fell upon this title, and a rave review from The Guardian,"Set to become a modern classic".
Is it?
I don't think so. Yes, the cast is strong, and being a filmfour production I had hopes of it being a gritty and original drama. Gritty - yes, original - no, not really. There's nothing really in this film that hasn't been seen before, in earlier superior dramas (for instance Sleepers, and others that my memory fails me on).
Charlize Theron is underused, not in screentime, but in character - seemingly she is there just to be a pretty face. Which of course she is, I won't argue with that.
Wahlberg's character is clearly the protagonist of the story, but yet his character is not particularly likable- not always a problem, but I think it would help to draw you into the story more if he weren't quite so humourless.
So I guess if you haven't seen it - the question is should you?
Perhaps, but don't expect the classic.
The 6th Day (2000)
Actually not bad
Well I got this film out on DVD last night so I feel obligated to say something about it. But now I realise that don't really have anything to add to the comment on the main page, which more or less says it all. But I might dig up a couple of things..
Arnie- looking a bit grizzled now, perhaps not the best actor in the world, but good to watch nonetheless. Those helicopters- was there any point in them being able to turn into jet planes? Some slightly iffy CGI aswell. But that's about it really - Duvall adds gravitas to the scenes he's in, and all around its not a bad picture, but I couldn't help thinking it could have been somehow better. So on an Empire scale.... *** out of 5.
Pity, because every time a new Arnie film comes out, I hope that somehow it'll be great.. but somehow they never quite are.
Vertical Limit (2000)
This film- good? No
I can't believe there are so many people commenting on this film who seriously believe this film is well made or directed.... I have to say it is technically probably one of the worst films I've ever seen. However let me qualify that statement by also saying its actually quite entertaining - I'm not quite sure how -perhaps it's something to do with the stereotypes, cliches or cheese - but it somehow it is. Its not in the cinemas anymore so if you havent seen it the question is- should you rent it? Well if you don't expect anything remotely realistic or believable then you might be OK.
Moontrap (1988)
This film is amazing
Well first let me qualify that statement slightly. This film is
amazingly....bad. But somehow it's also just... amazing.
By any standards of normal viewing, the acting is atrocious,
the special effects are...abysmal, the script..dreadful, and
the plot....well words fail me.
But somehow I kinda like it. I don't know why.
But if I were you I would be prepared to get to the end of the
film and get that strange feeling that you could have spent
the last 90 minutes more profitably. Like by banging your
head against a wall.
Buddy's Song (1991)
A slightly sleepy but otherwise endearing film
I think the reason why there are no comments for this film other than this , is probably because no-one has actually seen it. I think it may have only been on TV once, in perhaps 1992 - and since then it has drifted into the dusty recesses of the BBC archives.
Is this a shame? Well, while there are certainly better films to be watched than this- this does have some charms of its own. Chesney Hawkes, the two-hit wonder of the early nineties is OK in his only feature role to date, and Roger Daltrey is predictably cast to type.
My recollections of this film are that it is a pleasant enough way to spend two hours, although I suspect if I were to see it again I may judge it as a contrived and suspect piece of trite. Who knows?
Trust my memory. If it's on, and you're bored - give it a shot. Nothing to lose except two hours of your life, right?
The Sixth Sense (1999)
Great, spooky film.
Much has been made of the twist in this film. I don't know whether this says something about me or the predictability of Hollywood but from simply having some knowledge of what the film was about, I actually guessed what the twist would be before I had even seen the film. Given this hunch, it was really quite obvious as the film progressed that I was right -however even when it came at the end it was still packed with enough power that it sent a shiver through my body.
Credit then to the director, who accomplishes this, and the rest of the film with consumate skill. There are a few powerful moments in this film which should rightly go down as great moments in cinema. However if I was going to draw faults, I would say it takes too long for the plot which everybody already knows (that the kid can see dead people) to unfold, and that perhaps more could have been done with it one it has.
Still, great performances from both Bruce Willis and Haley Joel Osment as the kid make this as believable as it could possibly be, and you're unlikely to see a better chiller than this in the next year.
Go see it.
Airborne (1998)
This film is pants
Perhaps I'm being somewhat rash commenting on this film when I only saw the last 10 minutes of it on TV. However I felt compelled to warn anybody out there who might be tempted to rent this film - don't. For a start it stars Steve Guttenburg - this itself is no crime, however when the film is made in 1998, and not 1988 , this point becomes more pertinent. For a star who abandoned the police academy series because of dropping standards (tell me if I'm wrong here) it would seem he intended to go on and further his career with quality films. Well, it would seem not. From what I could glean from the climax of the film, there's a killer virus, cunningly contained in a glass container for maximum safety -which our hero Steve must reclaim from the evil Sean Bean. *SPOILER* (although to be honest I dont think there's much to spoil) Cue a daredevil jumping from car to plane taxiing along a runway sequence (gosh, thats never been done before) , with crap stunts (you wouldn't want to spoonerise those two wordS) and a thoroughly predictable ending that... Oh dear