faustbos's Reviews

Unhitched (2005)

4/10

22 August 2007

I expected much much more from this film. Normally I enjoy any project associated with Seth Green but even his involvement in this project couldn't give me enough to keep me going. File it under seen it all before, and done much better. The screen play is tired, the direction was miserable, and the editing was stale.

Simple plot. 2 childhood friends, who have gone their own way in life, come back together when one is getting married. (can you guess where this is going already). The one not getting married was supposed to be a writer but after submitting the best first 2 chapters of any novel and getting a 50000 advance to finish his book, he gets terminal writers block.

The expected wacky, nonsensical scene after scene follows with a climatic ending that is best suited for the season finale of Days of Our Lives. The pacing made me want to gnaw off my arm, but it was already gone from the previous screening of Death at a Funeral.

You know you're in trouble, when I spent the entire film wanting to see the movie based on the first two chapters of the unwritten Novel.

However, I saw this at a film festival. I was with a 21 year old guy and a couple of girls around the same age. The boy hated it, the girls loved it, and they all hated Becoming Jane earlier in the day.

Thats probably more helpful if you're wondering whether to shell out the bucks for this cold turkey.

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Girls Will Be Girls (2003)

7/10

One word... astrophysicist

18 June 2004

What a treat. I'm so glad I knew nothing about this film. I heard no buzz, had no opinions. Don't even know why we watched it. But the night we did, I don't think I've laughed that hard since I was on a teen field trip to see Romeo and Juliet (1968 version) with my class. After the movie, they screened Life of Brian, and for some odd reason, our teachers allowed us to stay. The Bigus Dickus scene had me gasping for air.... and I can assure you, my reaction was more than a snicker.

Back to this film. In the proud tradition of camp, drag, too much makeup, and false eyes, John Waters I'm sure had a proud grin whenever he saw this one. I'm intentionally saying very little about the film, because, its really not worth getting into. This film is more of an experience. See it with friends, straight or gay (mix is best). I'm sure we'll be popping this one in the DVD player, probably as a warm up or cool down for future Rocky Horror night.

One last note: Idea for an extra on a future DVD release of the film... Have each of the ladies read, the bad reviews from the IMDB. I enjoyed those almost as much as the film.

Now pardon me, I'm going to pop my last remaining copy of Asteroid into the VCR...

Later darlings.

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The Life of David Gale (2003)

3/10

last meal for this film..... Turkey

10 April 2004

Warning: Spoilers

Gosh, where to begin. This was not a good film. It sort of seemed to be a good film, tried to play like a clever film, but really, this is poor drama, movie making by numbers, and a horrible waste of a talented cast.

*****Spoilers*****

My big problem with this film is that it tries to have profound message but its completely unclear what that message is. If I assume the message is the death penalty is flawed and there are people who will give their lives for a higher cause... well, I guess for me, it makes the complete opposite point. When the governor of Texas claims at the end of the film that the system works and that the mistake happened because of a few flawed individuals playing with the system, he's probably right.

At this point I should reveal that I am not pro death penalty. In fact, I'm quite against it. I don't accept religious arguments as a justification for the death penalty. I believe a society that doesn't kill at all is the best society. Bad enough we have criminals that kill, compounding that with state executions seems, well, silly at best, and the evidence that it is a deterrent to crime just simply doesn't hold up.

But the people in this film, decide to prove that innocent people are put to death because of a flawed process involving the death penalty. Does this mean if the process were not flawed they would be pro capital punishment? Have they committed a crime to prove their point, obstruction of justice perhaps? There are some places where assisted suicide is a crime, other places where it is not. The death penalty is a moral question/argument and the intent behind the film makers doesn't seem to support their case.

Also, hello, its 2004. Anyone ever heard of DNA evidence? Maybe if this film was made 30 years ago, it would have been more profound. Hello, cell phones don't work in Texas? Well, guess we wouldn't have had that heroic jog to the death chamber if they had.

I have two other problems with the film:

1st: It wastes a potential better plot that its cast could surely have handled. What moment in time is the turning point when these people decide to give their lives for the cause. I'd have much preferred to learn more about the characters and how they got to the point in their lives where they would hatch such a plan. They clearly have motivations other than the death penalty at play here.

2nd: Utterly predictable, right down to the obvious plot twisting, and to the "off the record" tape at the end. There wasn't a moment of suspense regarding the plot.

I'd have to recommend skipping this one if you have a choice of films.

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Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (2003)

1/10

"Sh** Sandwich" - Spinal Tap

8 April 2004

I'm in Awe, with emphasis on the awful. This movie is proof positive that the movie going public gets what it deserves. People have already wasted their money on this film, and i'm sure we will see another opus by McG in the form of Charlie's Angels 3.

Not even mindless fun.

Its a shame because as watching this film I tried to pull out bits that might have held some faint hope of a plot, such as an angel gone bad.... heck lets explore that, my god, at LEAST TRY.

We even got a great cameo by Jaclyn Smith, I'm sure put there for fans of the original show, however, I doubt any real fan of Charlie's Angels would have lasted that long, or at the very least would have been busy cleaning up vomit off the floor during the cameo having lost all bodily control by what had previously transpired.

And then the closing credits. Apparently for lack of anything redeeming in this film, and i mean ANYTHING, at least we're to presume that the girls had a good time. Though, I envisioned a team of lawyers standing off camera pointing to their contracts which amongst other things, required the girls to have a good time, or else be in breech.

This movie, and I use the term lightly, is as bad as I've seen. IMDB needs a ZERO rating.

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