Reviews

In what the movie 'Moord in Extase' (1984) didn't really succeed, 'Baantjer' (1995-present) succeeded with honor. The characters created by Appie Baantjer (writer of novels about a detective named de Cock spelled C-O-C-K and his help Vledder) became, and still are today, a mega hit in The Netherlands, and Belgium as well. Ever since the beginning in 1995 De Cock (Piet Römer) and Vledder (Victor Reinier) are loved by a tremendous group of people. Weekly the show has superb ratings, even when RTL 4 (the channel broadcasting 'Baantjer' in The Netherlands) shows reruns!

And why? I can only guess, because there are actually no good reasons for watching it. Except maybe the guest stars. 'Baantjer' always has a few guest actors which are very famous in the Netherlands.

But other reasons for watching this crap?

Not the main cast actors, that's for sure. They all act very uninspired and bored with their roles, which I can understand very good. They have to do the same trick every episode. Yawn! Besides that there is too much product-placing in the series. So much that it would almost make the show camp. And the so-called jokes, mostly (99%) between De Cock and Buitendam (Serge-Henri Valcke), are as anti-funny as movies like Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow and worst of all, always the same. Buitendam gets angry at De Cock for no good reason and De Cock plays along with the kinda uptight Buitendam. The best reason not to see this show is the writing. Every episode is the same as the last one, there are never any surprises or interesting motives for a killing. Never a murder unsolved, yeah right. I know a lot of series have a patron every episode, but in 'Baantjer' it just doesn't work.

Every episode starts with a body found somewhere. Then De Cock and Vledder go to the crime scene (always arriving after Vera Prins, Marian Mudder), get some clues and talk to some people who could have done it or might have a clue who did it. Then there is the little 'gag' between De Cock en Buitendam, which always makes Buitendam look like a little dumb nitwit. Followed by a few short shots so we can see how pretty Amsterdam looks (By the way, if you want to see a film with interesting and nice shots of Amsterdam you should see 'Amsterdamned'). Next on the agenda is some interrogation and the visit to the local pub, with Lowietje (played by 5(!) actors already) behind the counter and the whores at the background. A few more interrogations follow and De Cock (always De Cock) has found out who did it and why.

And the final scene is always (100% always) the one where De Cock, Vledder, Prins, Keizer (played by Martin Schwab) and Mrs. De Cock are eating and summarizing the murder of that episode so childish that it looks as if they own only one human brain together.

And while typing this I realize what makes 'Baantjer' so popular. You can shut down your brain activity a whole lot and watch this mind numbing, unfunny (but with only a few percent brain activity everything is funny I guess), bad-acted, not surprising series! It's no more than mindless, simple entertainment.

This is one of those shows where I can truly say that I have seen every single episode. Thanks to the reruns, off course, which made me watch it over and over again when I was just a young, little boy. Not seeing (or perhaps not wanting to see) how bad the action, how boring and slow the story was. And how every episode was almost the same as the previous one. The fact that people only shot at other peoples legs (not in the head or chest) didn't bother me either in those days. Now it does bother me and I'm always wondering why I was such a fan in my youth. Luckily I found out after some thinking.

When I was a fan of Hannibal, Murdoch, Face and B.A. (and Amy) I saw a group of friends, very good friends helping out good people who were oppressed by the bad people. They always won, every episode ended as a feel-good-one, there were a lot of laughs, justice was served and my friends Hannibal, Murdoch, Face and B.A. (and Amy) took me home where I was waiting for them to pick me up for another adventure. And I thank them for that joy and adventure they gave me.

This comedy, originally based on ''Man about the house'' (1973), is on air for about eight years now, and for Dutch understandings that's quite long. There aren't many Dutch comedy's broadcasting that many seasons (for as far as I know only ''Zeg eens AAA'' (1981-1989) did as well as ''Oppassen!!!'' (1991-present)). Therefore, Sam Sam can be called a hit. Seeing it, it's quite obvious why it's such a success.

First of all, the acting is done professional and very enthusiast. Although it must be said that the (most of the time) bigger-than-life acting by John Jones is a possible annoy-factor. Secondly the series is fast, meaning there are no really long scenes, which is probably one of the reasons the series is especially popular by younger people. There isn't much time to get bored.Besides that the writing is almost perfect (very funny and not to predictable, a trap some comedy's fall in most of the time) and a few of the characters have one-liners everybody knows and loves. Riet Brouwer (played by Bea Meulman) says ''Heb ik dat!?'' (''That's my luck!'') a lot, while her husband's (Nol, played by Jules Royaards) filler is ''Gloeiende, gloeiende.'' (''Bloody, bloody.''). And when Nol meets Jimmy, Chris, Jo or Lex, he always calls them ''Eh.Dinges'' (''Eh.What's-your-name''). And almost naturally there is the boy-girl situation. The public as well as the other characters kinda know Jimmy (John Jones) and Chris (Anne-Mieke Ruyten) belong together, but they never seem to get together properly.

With John Jones and Anne-Mieke Ruyten as each-others love-interests, Elle van Rijn as the dumb, blonde Jo and Joost Buitenweg brilliantly playing Jimmy's best friend, over-sexed, and therefore disliked by Chris and Jo, Lex; the youngsters from ''Man about the house'' are replaced without a doubt as good as (or perhaps even a little better) than the original British cast. And the Ropers, originally played by Yootha Joyce and Brian Murphy with their whole hearts, are now performed by Bea Meulman and perfectly casted Jules Royaards.

So the biggest threat to the show would be the leaving of one of the actors. Or worse, two of the actors. This is what happened in 2001 when Anne-Mieke Ruyten and Elle van Rijn left the series. Replaced by Angelique de Bruijne and Anneke Beukman the show went on (it still does) without to much damage, so it seemed. But in my opinion, the episode described in the trivia section (where Jimmy and Chris finally end up together) should be the final episode of the series, while the show was still at its peak. OK, I admit, already it was a little over its peak.

Watching the show with the new actors isn't a disaster and sometimes it's as funny as it once was, but it's obviously a copy of something we've seen before (sometimes more than once before) already. But luckily it's an enjoyable copy.

This is one of those Looney Tunes cartoons used by Warner Brothers not mainly to entertain kids, but to educate them about the USA. In other words: Tell the children how good and brilliant and important the USA is and how many good and brave people died for 'this great country'. This is why Uncle Sam tells a dreaming Porky Pig to learn his Pledge of Allegiance. That's obviously the educational part of this 9-minutes long film, logically would be to start with the entertaining/funny things now, but in 'Old Glory' there is no fun. There isn't even an attempt made to be funny! As if the creators forgot that Looney Tunes cartoons are supposed to be witty or spoofing or something, but this particular one is tasteless in it's lack of entertainment what so ever!

In the era this little film was made, it wasn't unusual to promote the greatness and beauty of the USA or to make the USA-enemies look dumb/stupid. For instance in 'Bugs Bunny Nips the Nips' (1944) Bugs blows up several Japanese with exploding ice-cream! This all happened during the Second World War and although it's immoral to influence children the way it's done in this cartoons (and other Looney Tuners), you have to admit it's smart to use the Looney Tunes for this purpose. The cartoons are funny ('Old Glory' being the exception to this rule) and kids (and adults as well) adore Bugs, Daffy, Porky and all the others.

And that is why we see Porky Pig in 'Old Glory' studying and dreaming of the greatness of his country. With Uncle Sam explaining him (and the unknowing little viewers) all about how important loving the USA is. In an immoral, joke-less, spoof-less, un-witty cartoon.

'Allo 'Allo

listen very careful, I shall write this only once: simply the best!

Somewhere in France, in Nouvion to be exactly, lives René Artois (played by Gordon Kaye). He owns a cafe, Café René, and his life is going as usual: He cheats his wife Edith (Carmen Silvera) with his two waitresses Yvette and Maria (Vicky Michelle and Francesca Gonshaw) and business goes as usual. The life of Frenchman René is going like he wants it to go, nice and steady. Nothing should change. But one detail will foil this from happening: The second World War. (Or as it is said brilliantly in the series more than once 'There is a war on, you know.') Before he knows what has happened René Artois is hiding two British airman, Fairfax and Carstairs (John D. Collins and Nicolas Frankau) from the nazi's, is he the helper of the French resistant, he has to stay friends with the Germans (they are good for business and for staying alive) and avoid interfering with the Gestapo while he's breaking almost all of the nazi rules and his life is totally disturbed. In the very first episode of the series this is all shown. For the fans of ''Allo 'Allo' this first episode is a must-see.

From now on René has got to do the most crazy, stupid, embarrassing and funny things to try to get the airman back to Britain, with the help of Michelle ''Listen very careful, I will say this only once'' of the resistance (Kirsten Cooke) who always comes up with a plan to avoid the Nazi's in the attempt to get the airman back home. Of course these plans always fail to happen on the most strange and remarkable ways, what keeps Fairfax and Carstairs at 'Café René' in the most miraculous and dumb hiding places.

Luckily the Nazi's aren't the smartest and hardest people in the town of Nouvion. Colonel Von Strohm (Richard Marner) and his assistant Captain Hans Geering (Sam Kelly, later replaced by Captain Alberto Bertorelli, played by Gavin Richards), for instance, never seem to see Michelle of the resistance when she comes in the café 'nondescript', probably 'cause they're to busy having a good time whit waitresses Yvette and Maria (and later on in the series when Maria is gone little Mimi, played by Sue Hodge). Luckily for René he is in a plot with the colonel and the captain about the painting 'The Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies' by Van Klomp. The men want to sell it after the war instead of giving it to Hitler and René has to hide the painting in his sausages. So, the colonel and the captain need René.

One of the other nazi's in the little town is Lieutenant Herbert Gruber (Guy Siner).The reason René and his wife and waitresses don't get caught by him is because he fancies René. That's why Gruber is always willing to lend a hand (or more) to help out the café owner. Needless to say the situation between René and Lieutenant Gruber creates a lot of memorable funny scenes, for instance when René, who's always nervous with Gruber around, is dressed like a woman (all part of a plan from Michelle to get the airman back to Britain) and the Lieutenant comes in the café, or when René had just got back from a hospital (again because of a plan from Michelle) late at night and has only a hospital nighty on, one without a back and the lieutenant enters the café. Von Strohm, Geering and Gruber aren't such a problem for the café owner, but the Gestapo on the other hand is something timid René Artois fears even more than he fears his wife Edith finding out about his affairs with the waitresses. Not without reason; Herr Flick (Richard Gibson, in the last season played by David Janson) and his little helper Von Smallhousen (John Louise Mansi) are working all the time to rule out the resistance in Nouvion with René as the prime suspect. They also have a female assistant 'a woman of the opposite sex' named Private Helga Geerhard (Kim Hartman), but what Flick and Von Smallhousen don't know is that she double-crosses the two Gestapo-officers. She helps the colonel and the captain because she knows about their plan with the painting and also wants a part of the money from the 'Fallen Madonna with the big boobies' by Van Klomp. Besides enemy's René also has a lot of friends who are also against the nazi's. The already mentioned Michelle and the two airmen, but there are more: For Instance there is the undertaker Monsieur Alphonse (Kenneth Connor) who fancies Madame Edith but has to much admiration for the brave resistance hero René Artois to take her away from him, Monsieur 'It is I Leqlerc' Leqlerc (Jack Haig) who helps Michelle getting the messages to René. He always has the stupidest disguises to fool the nazi's. Or as René once said it so truly : 'Leqlerc, the man with a thousand faces and they're all the same.' And last but definitely not least there is officer 'Good moaning' Crabtree (Arthur Bostrom), or as Yvette once said: 'That British agent who thinks he speaks our language.' He too is a message-bringing helper from Michelle.

Overall viewed René is in a tight spot with dumb plans, evil enemies, a wife he cheats which she may not find out, naturally, a painting in a sausage, dumb helpers and a nazi who fancies him. In an other film or series this all could be ingredients for a very dramatic story, but not in 'Allo 'Allo, where everything is idiotic or at least odd.

For instance, in the series there is a big difference between English with a French accent (this is spoken by René, Edith and the waitresses and all the other French people) and English spoken with a British accent (spoken by the Fairfax and Carstairs). So when the two airman want to say something to for instance René they don't understand each other, even though they are all speaking English for the public understands. This might look very unfunny, but it's actually quite good and always good for a little smile.

Also the whole storyline about the painting in a sausage provides a lot of funny (sometimes to predictable, but always enthusiast played) scenes. This also counts for the scenes between Gruber and René, always played with passion by Guy Siner and a kind of caution by Gordon Kaye. A little bit overacted, but that is in the whole series, that's one of the reasons it's such delight to watch, I think.

Tombstone Title: Too much is never good

This 130-minutes during film doesn't give you a very good feeling. Sure, the actors are all playing their parts well (not good, just well) and Val Kilmer is really terrific as the tuberculosis patient Doc Holliday (it is one of the best roles Kilmer has ever done) and the scenery is very well done, but there is something not all right with the movie. The problem is that there are simply to many characters in this work. Besides the three Earp brothers Wyatt, Virgil and Morgan there are the three wives of the brothers, Doc Holliday and his Hungarian Kate, the tempting Josephine and her colleague Mr. Fabian, Billy Breckenridge, a good role from Jason Priestley, and a hole bunch of bad guys. It just isn't possible to put all of these persons lives and problems in 130 minutes of film. The headaches that Wyatt Earp's wife has, for instance, don't get enough attention to get involved in her situation. The same goes for the whole Morgan Earp-character, played unenthusiastic by Bill Paxton. He hasn't got enough screentime to get you interested in why he does what he does. He seems to be in this movie for the reason that it's impossible to make a movie about the legendary Wyatt Earp without mentioning his two brothers Virgil and Morgan.

The second thing not making the movie a very good one is that you don't know who the main character is: Wyatt Earp or Doc Holliday. In the beginning it's obvious that Kurt Russell's Wyatt Earp is the most important person in the film, but slow but sure the Doc Holliday-part gets bigger and so much more interesting than Earp. This is because Val Kilmer is playing Doc Holliday with his whole heart and because you feel more for Holliday that for Earp. Wyatt Earp (in this motion picture) is a man who just wants to get a lot of money with doing as little as possible and Doc Holliday is the kind of person who wants to be there for Earp whenever he needs him, ill or not, Earp can always count on Doc Holliday. Writer Kevin Jarre and director George P. Cosmatos should have made a choice between Earp and Holliday and they didn't. That's a shame and it makes 130 minutes a heck of a long time.

Luckily, like I mentioned before, Val Kilmer is a pleasure to watch and Jason Priestley and Billy Zane are acting very good as well. The scenery's are very impressing and Joseph Porro's customs are nearly perfect. All of this keeps the movie watchable, but not much more that that I'm afraid.

The first series where Annette Barlo had the lead role (in Oppassen!!! she was 'one of the stars'), didn't get a second chance. After the first series of 13 episodes, there was decided to stop the show. And that's a shame, because the series wasn't so bad. In Dutch comedy's of the 90's it often happens that the actors in it are lousy comedians, but 'Hij en Julia' has actors with a talent for comedy. They don't play that they are funny, they ARE funny. Especially Hans Somers (he plays Gijs, the 'Hij' from the title), Oda Spelbos (she plays the college of Gijs, Lonneke) and Edda Barends (she plays the mother of Julia) do this very good. Unfortunately Annette Barlo doesn't control this skill 100% and that isn't always good for the credibility of the story.

The title referral to William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet (in The Netherlands that is 'Romeo en Julia'), tells us that the two lead roles are lovers who have trouble 'finding' each other. That idea doesn't have to be bad (in the American series 'The Nanny' it is delicious to see Fran Fine and Maxwell Sheffield 'finding' each other, what takes years), but for some reason it doesn't really appear clearly in 'Hij en Julia'. Why is hard to tell, because the chemistry between Annette Barlo and Hans Somers is very close to perfect. Maybe it was just to obvious they would come together.>

The writing work from Ger Apeldoorn and Harm Edens (host of 'Dit was het nieuws') is always rather good and sometimes (but not enough to praise the duo for their writing) even terrific. Besides the title reference here is no surplus value what so ever. No cameo's, no music/title song that you can't get out of your mind, no background or inside jokes.

'Hij en Julia' is just a nice dutch comedy with good acting work and a few good laughs now and then. No more, and certainly no less.

Casablanca may well be the best movie ever to be made in the whole world! The acting, the directing, the light, the script, the clothes and especially the quotes are simply perfect! You have to see this movie, this is one of those movie you may not mis, whatever your favorit genre is! I don't their are movies with more brilliant quotes dan Casablanca, with one of the best actors ever to appear on the silver screen, Humprey Bogart.

What to say about a serie that is almost perfect? You can say what is not perfect in it. That's what i'm going to do. There are two (little) reasons the series isn't perfect. The first reason is that there are new persons in every episode. Sometimes it is a little hard to know who is who. But this is just a tiny 'problem'.

Another 'problem is that the occupations of the two main players (Huub Stapel and Marcel Hensema as Herman Vlieger and wessel van Ede) don't mix too well. Herman is an advocate and Wessel is a shrink. These two occupations don't see to have anything in comment and this sometimes give you the feeling it are two different series. Thats a shame!

But the actors are perfect, great and everything else which is positive. All of the actors. They gives you the feeling all of it is really happening. The camerastands are more than perfect. Not like you have seen it over a thousand times, but like you have seen them only once or twice. This is because the camera isn't just standing somewhere, but the camera is everywere; sometimes it's above the actors, the next scene it is next to them and in the third scene the camera is very low to the floor.

The extras are that Herman and Wessel are two homosexuals who love each other and have just bought a house they have to fix. The good thing about 'Wet en Waan' is that this doesn't play a big role in the series. Being gay isn't something special in 'Wet en Waan'. The other extra is that the serie gives some attention to the private life of Herman. He has two beautiful daughters and one of them (played by Rifka Lodeizen) wants to be an advocate as well. She gets a job at the same place as her father Herman and he doesn't really like this situation.

So that's why wet+waan=wow.

All stars - de series (based on the movie from Jean van de Velde, 1997, who also made this title) is superb to the movie. The movie was not bad, pretty good actually: there were soccer players and they all had their problems they had to deal with. But in the movie they weren't on the field so much. And that automatically means that they were not together all the time. That is a shame, because there can only be funny or dramatic scenes when the guys (a bunch of losers, ordinary people)are together. This is why the series is so good: they play soccer in every episode, they shower in (almost) every episode and this means a lot of funny and dramatic conversations between the guys. And some other thing that's very important: the actors are great, perfect. Especially Thomas Acda playing Willem, the keeper, a loser with a wife, kids and a business who is tired of his wife and his kids and likes his business. Unfortunately he has quit All stars -de series, that's a shame. But all the other actors make up for his missing. Roeland Fernhout and Dirk Zeelenberg are perfect as the gay Bram (Fernhout was the first Bram in the series), Kasper van Kooten IS total loser Peter who started to play with the all stars when they all were seven, wile the others started as they were six and this is still a problem for him. He is not really 'one of them'. Daniel Boissevain and Kees Boot are splendid as the 'angry young man' Johnny and Raymbi Sambo plays his role (named Paul) with so much fun that you just start to love him. And if there isn't enough quality acting there are Antonie Kamerling and Cas Jansen as Hero and Nemo. They are brothers and they are always stoned and this makes them say the most idiot things, that means , if they are able of speaking properly. This is a perfect series with perfect actors and much of laughs and sometimes a little drama which makes you think. But the laughter is the most important ingredient of this Emmy Award winning Dutch series.

Robert Carlyle is famous because of Trainspotting (a brillant movie by the way) were he played the b****rd Begbie who would start a fight for no reason. With the reason that he found that funny. That he is an actor who can play something totally different than the Begbie-role.

In 'go now' he plays a soccer player who gets MS, the disease that kills you slowly, starting with making you tired and weak. Carlyle plays the role very real and believeble. Because he don't wants to be a problem for his girlfriend he leaves his girlfriend and the house. In the next scene you see him standing outside in the rain just looking at nothing and his girlfriend staring out of the window at him. This scene is so very touching and so real that there is a good possibility that there are coming tears out of your eyes. A very good, touching and warm film.

'Tintin et le rac aux requins' is not based on one of the books of Herge. Greg (also a maker of comics) wrote the story for this film. He didn't do a really bad job, but there are no surprises or (very) funny scenes in the scenario. It is a simple film about Tintin going on adventure with his dog Bobbie and Haddock, the captain. On the way to the prof. (called Tournesol in the original French version) they meet the two stupid detectives (called Dupont et Dupond in the original French version). The prof. has invented something and Tintin and Haddock (this is their real French name) have to protect it from Rastapopoulos, a bad villain who is never scary or something that would make him a real villain.

There are no surprises, jokes or something else this film could and should be remembered for. And the worst of all: Greg came up with two annoying kids who are trying to help Tintin in his 'quest' to beat Rastapopoulos.

If you really want to enjoy yourself: read the books of Tintin made by Herge, because they ARE funny, full of surprises and they DO have things one could and should remember!!!

This film is a very nice one. There are a few reasons for that. Danny de Vito (playing Bill Rago) is great and plays his role very enthusiast. De Vito's best scene is the one where he is in the office where he's going for a job. He totally does NOT want to be there because he's ashamed of being there. When he gets a teaching job offered, the look on his face,when he finds out he is supposed to teach soldiers in the army, is marvelous. All the other actors are playing (very) good, especially Gregory Hines as drill-instructor who wants Bill Rago gone. The few scenes Hines and De Vito share together are no less than hilarious, that's for sure.

The story is not as strong as the (sometimes) brilliant acting from the whole cast. To be honest, the story of Jim Burnstein is predictable and boring. Not only is the ending something you know 30 minutes before it's there, also the most important lines of the story are predictable and because of that boring. I can't spoil the movie, but let me tell you: For this film, Jim Burnstein wanted all happy things and endings, even when it's not appropriate.

If you have read Willliam Shakespeare's 'Hamlet' (a brilliant book, if I may say so) you'll enjoy this film a lot more.

If you like this motion picture you should also see 'Dead Poets Society' with Robin Williams.

Batman (1989, directed by Tim Burton) was certainly not a bad movie, especially because Jack Nicholson played his Joker-role with 110% enthusiasm, but Batman Returns (1992, also directed by Tim Burton) is even better. Bad guy Danny De Vito (playing The Penguin) plays great and bad girl Michelle Pfeiffer (as The Catwoman) is the best and most sensual Catwoman ever! Pfeiffer in her Catwomansuit is simply delicious to watch!! She also acts out the cat-habits like licking herself very good. And then there is Micheal Keaton as Batman. He was good in the first film and there didn't change anything, he's still a great Bruce Wayne/ Batman.

Another improvement to the first Batman film is the story. In the first movie the main woman (played by Kim Basinger) is in the film, but what she's doing there? I don't know. In Batman Returns The Catwoman has a very important role which pushes the story along.

The conclusion is that Batman 2 is better than Batman 1 and that there is nothing bad to say about the film.

Jaws is simply a perfect movie. The first megahit for Steven Spielberg and a deserved one, because the film is at all points great! The music from John Williams is one of the best a movie has ever had. The main players (Richard Dreyfuss, Roy Scheider and Robert Shaw) are outstandingly good, so are the others by the way and the line "you gonna need a bigger boat"" is so true and also one you won't forget.

Jaws looks very good, if you see him, 'cause you don't get to see him that often. The shots at the water are also of a high quality. They are very threatening. This is a movie you have to see at least once in your lifetime.(Even the second time you are chained to your seet). Something you would almost forget: not all the sharks kill people". There are far more sharks killed by people than there are people killed by a shark!!!