Change Your Image
jzblijden
Reviews
The 355 (2022)
Captilizing on cheap empty feminism
The story of this movie does not make any sense. All choices are based on the fact we should believe that these women who normally don't trust anyone suddenly trust strange women from different countries based on the fact they have the same gender. One of them is not even a secret agent but a therapist who keeps in the group for no reason. Also, her name is Graciela, and she allows the others to call her by a petname Gracie even though they just met and basically kidnapped her. (I would really hate that)
The movie also has a weird pace. Fast and yet too slow.
The actresses do an okay job considering the lines they have to try to pull off. Some of the outfits are cool.
Also: WHY DIDNT THEY JUST DESTROY THE DRIVE?!
Single All the Way (2021)
Show our social progress is very limited
This movie shows we as a society have progressed enough to think interracial relationships and gays are a okay, but yet are still caught up on the idea that
1. Being single is the biggest sin of all
2. The gay best friend's life revolves around the white main character
3. Have a sick amount of christmas lights on ur house with no regard for sustainability
4. Marriage is the ultimate goal in life
5. There is nothing worse than being alone at christmas
6. Bad child actors are still acceptable (that boy)
I will say though that i liked the fact he had names for his plants, so yeah.
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)
You cant call this a vampire movie
So in this one the victoria vampire is back with an army of vampires. She still want to eat Bella for no reason at all. Bella is still being a stupid lil potatohead. Bella now realized she also loves Jake but wants to become a vampire and marry edward. Its unclear why she wants to be a vampire. Its never explained since this movie honestly doesnt have a plot. Also jake never wears clothes and eddie stil sparkles. DONT WATCH IT WILL HURT YOUR EYEBALLS.
The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)
So so bad its like why why
So in this movie the other guy outs himself as a werewolf. The movie pretends as the wee lil girl has to choose between the werewolf or the vampire, while in reality both options are horrid. The world is not zero sum people. Just focus in your school dear. Very bad movie. Really hated it as much as the first one. DONT WATCH.
Twilight (2008)
This movie is so bad i now hate myself for watching it
So this movie is about a wee lil girl that makes horrible choices when it come to man. In this one she falls in love with a vampire that wants to eat her the entire movie. The girl knows this and obviously has a death wishes. Also the vampire wears make up, does his eyebrows and sparkles in the sun. So bad! Really hated it.
Falling Inn Love (2019)
Delivers what it promisses
This movie is pretty bad, but hey, once youve read the title you know what kind of movie this is, a bad one that used to be made by that giftcard company. I feel like this movie perfectly executes the movie you think you are going t9 get, so enjoy and dont be like me hella annoyed (how does she just give her house in SF to her friend? Where did she got the money from to renovate? Why does everyone help her out for free? We never se anyone do any real work except for carrying stuff around. Why is the guy still interested in the girl while she was mean to him the first half of the movie for no reason? (I kinda liked the goat, nice touch) by how bad it is, cause you knew this was coming.
Secret Obsession (2019)
Remaining questions
1. What happened to the guy that came to the hospital and got killed and how was he connected?
2. Why didnt she go down the stairs on her bump?
3. Why did they tell us the detective was mourning his daughter?
4. How did no one go and check om her dead parents in three months?
5. How did her phone stil had a battery after three months? (Also where can i get this phone?)
6. Why did her husband look like he just died when he was in there for months (when her parents did decompose)?
7. How is the entire hospital staff stupid?
8. Why would she keep her ring on the finger during surgery?
9. Why was his password Jennifer Allen? (Thats so dumb)
10. Why do did they have such a small bed in such a big house?