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Naomh
Reviews
The Cabin in the Woods (2011)
Over hyped, nonsensical crap!
Let me start of by saying "I get it".
I knew something of the premise and I couldn't wait to love the film and see what original and satirical road it was going to take. In the end I wasted an hour and a half of my life and became angry having handed over my hard earned cash over to this excuse for a film.
Put it this way, if Joss Whedon's name wasn't on this film it would have gone direct to DVD!
*SPOILERS BELOW*
As I watched the film I began putting it together. I knew from the trailer that some "Truman Show" kind of vibe was going on. Even if it ended up being Truman Show meets Cabin in the Woods it would of been vaguely interesting. Then I got the idea that an audience of some description was watching this big brother style and demanding blood. Cool, I though a Battle Royale / Hunger Games vibe was creeping in. Interesting. I was prepared to forgive the complete lack of tension knowing the scenario was being controlled by people with power to kill the characters at any moment and change their thoughts via various gases (?). I also disliked most of the characters. You can't mock horror clichés with clichés, they are still clichés - and boring one dimensional ones at that. Nevertheless I went along with it. Then the zombies arrived. I thought maybe they were actors pretending to be zombies in this "Running Man" kind of environment. But then I realized the WERE actual zombies. I began to loose grip on the genre I thought I was in. I thought I was in "the real world" so to speak. Then a Japanese Ringu-like spirit on a TV screen... WTF, I thought - spirits too!? When they went down in the elevator into the chamber of horrors, I lost all interest. "The ancient gods demand sacrifice"? Give me a break. What has an evil clown got to do with ancient Gods? I had lost all interest and I couldn't care less who lived or died. "Oh but it represents us, the audience" no it's just lazy writing! A story should work and be utterly engaging first and foremost, any analogy or subtext should be icing on the cake - not the reason to validate the supposed "entertainment". A great, great pity. Wanted to love this but wasted my time. Don't waste your time! Avoid.
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (2011)
Tinker Tailor Soldier... Yawn....
I have not been as disengaged by a movie in a long time! Yes it looks great and the production design and costumes were moody and flawless, but I found myself asking "why should I care?" about these characters. I felt NOTHING watching the film, except maybe a bit uneasy in my seat as Gary Oldman sat around 'thinking' in yet another scene. I just about followed the plot but it certainly was not an entertaining experience. A lot of critical sucking up going on it seems but most of the theater I watched it with sighed and shifted in their seats throughout, and people left at the end muttering "what was all that about?". A real bore.
Fish Tank (2009)
Fish W'ank
Caught this on TV last week and I couldn't be more dismayed at the praise this film has received.
Quick review - a boring film where nothing much happens and anything that does happen is filled with clichés. What? He has a wife and daughter!? *Cue shock / horror music. The "Symbolism" was also pap. A white horse she is trying to free from the chains of this horrible area? - A horse we're told was 16 and was her time and she was killed off. Sigh... The Mother and two daughters who haven't the ability to be warm to each other, yet dance in perfect unison together at the end. You see folks, they are a family! Gimme a break.
Overall it looked quite nice but a bit repetitive after a while and that's about it. For what it's worth I enjoyed the directors previous film Red Road a lot better. At least that had a plot!
Attack the Block (2011)
Unfunny, unscary, unlikeable
I really, really wanted to love this. I love high concept films and I love comedy sci-fi / horrors - this falls flat on it's face alas. The leads are unlikeable. I get the moral tale near the end, but it's too little too late. Their apology to the nurse they mug came across as false. They're painted as unintelligible thugs at first and then we're told to like them and yet none have any charm or wit to speak of. Their accent got tiring and it seemed like they felt no emotion. They're just stupid bullies and at least three of the gang felt like they were basically the same character! It's fine having anti-hero's but give me a reason to like them. Here I found myself rooting for the aliens! I also found it to be pretty unfunny for a comedy and pretty unscary for a horror sci-fi. The aliens looked good (not like crappy CGI thankfully) but I didn't get what they did or what made them special. Ultimately what's the difference between them and hungry dogs? Early in the film we see them attack two police officers with the kind of power and ferocity that they never wield again. What's that about? The action also didn't build. It felt like the same scene over and over again.
I really don't know what the hype about this film is. It's sad, I love the work of joe cornish and with edgar wright watching over his shoulder i was expecting a classic. What I got was a limp film I won't be watching again or recommending to anyone.
The Social Network (2010)
Felt nothing
Felling nothing to me is the sign of a bad film - personally I think that's why I go to the movies; to feel excitement, sadness, joy, horror, humor - whatever. The Social Networks showed rich aholes being aholes to each other. I found not a single character to root for and it felt that nothing was at stake, not really. Even their friendship wasn't made out to be any great thing in the beginning before it all went upside down.
Sure it was interesting in a news article kind of way, but it was souless. Was that the point? I doubt it, and if so - so what? Add to that the worst CGI 'cold breath' and falling snow that wouldn't look out of place in a cartoon and you have a film that seems to be over hyped because it involves 'recent events'. My prediction? It will not be remembered so fondly in cinema history. Fincher hasn't made a truly great film in over 10 years. Maybe The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo will find him back on form. We can hope.
Inception (2010)
Refreshing concept. Stale action
Inception is overall an enjoyable experience. The concepts and rules Nolan presents to us are, like the intriguing Morpheus / Neo relationship (in the superior The Matrix) delivered to us in large chunks of exposition that never get boring due to the interesting ideas being put forth. This film never bores.
However for a film about dreams, the action and set-pieces (except for a fight in zero G) are surprisingly unimaginative. Chases are never more than run, shoot, run (unlike some set pieces in the Bourne movies for example) and scenes like the ski chases in the snow feel flat when they could have been exciting set pieces with a bit more thought. It seems to me, that even though I enjoy his films, Nolan's weakest link is his direction of action.
I also thought there could have been more use of the surreal and of the bending of physics at some stages. Yes I know they need the subject to be tricked into believing that it is not a dream but at one point a subject is told that he is dreaming, giving Nolan a pass to screw things up a bit visually. Yet he only goes so far as to have a bar shake and drinks in glasses bend with gravity. He could have gone further in scenes like this that's just my opinion.
Overall this is worth seeing. Nolan has not made a single bad movie and all his movies are worth seeing. Inception isn't one of his top three (That's The Prestige, The Dark Knight and Memento in my opinion) but he can stand proudly beside his resume with this addition.
Avatar (2009)
In the end it's all about story...
Avatar is one of the most amazing looking films I have ever seen. The story however, sucks (as does the music).
THE GOOD -
Great 3D, best use of it I've seen. No gimmicks like sticking things out at the audience which snaps you right out of the film. Here it was just depth and exhilarating.
As I watched the visual effects in Avatar all I could feel was a sense of awe and also a sense of sadness. I felt sad for any other film that might have been up for any forthcoming visual effect nominations. Avatar will take them all.
Some scenes felt truly magical. Like the first time jake and Neytiri fly together. I was totally engaged.
The BAD
The script was bad. We have seen this story countless times. The storytelling wasn't great either. It would have been great to see the state earth has become - would have made Pandora seem all the more virginic. It would have been great to have some character development. To illustrate Jakes change a bit better. To shade the two dimensional bad guy a bit more...
The music. The music was lazy and unimaginative. James Horner phoned this one in and Avatar could of had a unique sound - like the way LOTR has - but instead sounds like every other blockbuster. This is a shame.
All in all. A visual feast for the eyes but nothing more.
Where the Wild Things Are (2009)
Where the Wild Things Sleep
This movie started out great and a great sense of gritty childhood but after a half hour in the world of the wild things I got bored really quickly. It looks great (well, in that hand held, long lens 'indie' kind of way) and the creatures were fantastic (I loved the design and how they were brought to life) but not a lot happens in the story. The kid, a great actor, is a bit annoying in a brat-like kind of way and I never really felt like he learned anything. I never knew what was at stake or who to root for so I disconnected from the story.
If I was to summarize I'd say - this film looks great and feels fresh but the script is all over the place. If there's one thing I feel about Spike Jonze and people like Michel Gondry etc... they are genius behind the camera but not the pen (or the keyboard). If I were them I'd let writers like Charlie Kaufman take care of my scripts - the proof is there, he wrote their best films by far.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)
Sucked Devastator balls!
Crap. This movie was, on the whole, just crap.
The opening scene in Shanghai and the forest battle were great but everything else sucked Devastator balls.
I really liked the first one. It was an enjoyable origin story that had a good dose of humour, action and spectacle. This movie hits a dumb note from the get go. What, we start of our film because a piece of the 'all spark' falls out of Shias jacket? Give me a, lame excuse for a movie, break. Que an unnecessary OTT gremlins meets transformers scene that goes nowhere. Que a stupid sub plot involving Shia's pornstar girlfriend that culminates with her catching him 'cheating' with a female terminator (sorry, I mean 'transformer human' or 'pretender' or whatever it was called). Cue a plot line so contrived and forced and daft that it boggled the mind. There are so many explosions and hard-to-make-out-who-is-who robot action that after a while you just become numb to it. A guy beside me was yawning was bullets and bombs went off near the pyramids - that's not the emotion you want with people watching an action film. These kind of films are as much about build up and suspense as they are about hardcore action and here the whole movie was just the latter. Less would have been so much more. Disappointing.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)
The Curious case of Forrest Gump
As I left the theater there was only one thought running through my head; what ever happened to David Fincher? This film, although it has a nice central idea of a man growing younger and meeting a woman growing older, is ultimately about nothing. 45mins could EASILY have been chopped out of this. Did you need the Tilda Swinton story? All the crap on the boat?
The Forrest Gump analogies are rampant. In fact this is the love child of Big Fish and Forrest Gump. Alabama voice over, Lieutenant Dan, even having a symbol that was supposed to represent the them of the film - which by the way was WEAK in this movie. What a stupid idea the humming bird was - it's wings beat in a figure 8 motion and 8 is the symbol for infinity... Give me a break. Although I'm not Forrest Gump's biggest fan at least the feather was subtle and poetic. The Humming bird feels forced.
The special effects were a mixed bag. The digital make up was good and Pitt as an old man (except for one or two overly fake lip movements) were spot on. However traditional effects and digital matte paintings were atrocious and substandard. At first I thought the film was going to be a 300(esque) blue screen job - but then Fincher betrays that overly stylized style by having the film post-1950s being uber real. He even has Brad Pitt traveling around the world at one point and they look as if they were filmed in the real locations.
There a sequence in it that involves a traffic accident that almost made me yawn out loud. I get it Fincher. I see the point you are trying to make. It is a scene that feels robbed from Jean Pierre Jeunet or someone (only he'd have made it more entertaining by speeding it up and having the action happened really fast so you are playing catch up).
In also ends without any real closure and left me feeling... Meh. Stick to the darkness Fincher, you work best in that world.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
"Noooooooooo....." (and the music...)
Spielberg said that this film would be the "sweet dessert after the bitter herbs' of 'Munich'". Well this tastes like crap. Take it back to the kitchen! Second favourite franchise killed in a matter of 2 hours. Sigh...
Why guys? Why? Why damage your own legacy when you must have known the script was below par. Waaay below.
For me, one of my biggest gripes was the music. I believe the Indiana Jones films, have the escapism comes from the great soundtracks. In this movie they just reused cues from the other films. Even my girlfriend, who wouldn't be a big movie soundtrack lover, recognized the Knight theme from Last Crusade. There was one scene where they were knocking off those heads to make the sand come out that sounded like the tripod appearance from War of the Worlds. WTF? Indy in the refrigerator made me think of Homer Simpson and that ain't a good thing for such an action idol.
Where was the sense of place? I used to love how the previous films allowed me to 'travel'. That because the crew actually traveled. Tunisia, Sri Lanka, Petra. Here they traveled to the local back lot. Honestly Jacksons island in King Kong felt more real that most of this.
Spielbergs camera is always a joy to watch but a sense of magic was missing. All in all it felt LAZY. In the theatre I seen it at there was huge applause at the start, some laughs for the comedy throughout (which worked) but a limp groan from some, odd clap here and there, but deflated feel by the time it became Mars Attacks at the end and the credits rolled.
No Country for Old Men (2007)
Worse ending ever.
This film was going so well, I was enjoying it so much and then... they go and pi** you off with a deeply unsatisfying turn of events. The last 15 - 20 mins of the movie felt like epilogue. Too novel like for a movie in my opinion.
***SPOILER AHEAD***
How engaged can you expect an audience to be when you kill off the one guy that we are rooting for waaay before the end of the movie? When I saw him dead I was shocked at first. A good thing maybe? Yeah sure but then I lost interest in the movie as I didn't care about anyone else. A great movie ruined by a poor ending.
El laberinto del fauno (2006)
Over Hyped
I was really looking forward to this movie but was really let down by it instead. I truly cannot fathom the critical masturbation that seems to be going on surrounding this "masterpiece". If this is a masterpiece then the bar for high quality works of art in film has been reduced to a new low. The film is not bad, had I seen it out of context I would have thought it a watchable distraction with some slow uninteresting parts but pretty good effects. Instead I'm told this is a masterful, beautiful work of genius. It is not. It is far from it. The tone is far from magical for the fantasy pieces, and far from intriguing, dramatic or real for the civil war sequences.
The tone is dour overall. The child actress Ivana Baquero does a great job in scenes dealing with sadness or cruelty. But as for a range of emotions she doesn't seem to go much further than this. I don't think I can remember Ofelia laughing at any stage, or being truly angry, or truly enchanted by these fascinating creatures appearing before her. "I saw a fairy" she says to her Mother "Did you? Well you sure don't look like you did" should have been the response. For that matter I don't think I can remember her convey much emotions apart from her the overall subdued morbidity. Perhaps Del Toro intended this but I doubt it and it tends to create very simplistic characters. The Father Vidal is a predictable card board cut out bad guy. Has this very obvious fact floated over the critics heads? The camera is pedestrian and unremarkable, and the production design could/should have been much better. I found the music was not evocative and certainly not enchanting or magical.
**MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD STOP NOW** Things got even more diluted and un-focused toward the end, the Faun returns because the script merely requires him to and he decides to give Ofelia another chance. And killing the kid felt very forced and manipulative. I tend to feel if this hadn't happened and the "real" war scenes had been removed praise for the film would have been considerably reduced. These are the scenes designed to induce a feeling of bold greatness in the audience but I found them to be cheap tricks in a slightly above average film. "The Devils Backbone" remains Del Toros best film. Campared to that Pan is poor indeed.
Strangers (2006)
Original, poignant, provocative
I caught this little gem at The Kerry Film Festival where it picked up the award for Best International Short. It's an inventive and original take on what can sometimes be a well worn subject matter. This short avoids the clichés by delivering an inventive and powerful experience that ends in a satisfying twist which I won't reveal here of course.
A very well executed, very well photographed and very well acted short by all involved, (particularly young Grant Silver and the Mother Kristin Carey).
Worth catching if you can. I look forward to seeing more of this directors work.