Hardboiled. I just don't know where to begin, except with that I just finished it. And all I can say is "waaaaaaaa! Action!". Seriously, the protagonist kills not one, not two, not three, but eight people while holding a baby, and that's shortly after rapping to it. The baby never cries, but instead repays the favor later on it a most ridiculous way. At the rate people were dying in that movie I'm forced to conclude China simply has people to throw away. It pretty much hit every cliché, and all the characters were at least twice as accurate while involved in one of the million combat rolls that occurred.... even in the scenes without gun violence. It was the most actiony action movie to ever have action. Oh, and the subtitles are pretty amusing in parts, like when they conqueror the bad guys. Of the hundreds and hundreds of people slain in this movie, the cops sustain the heaviest casualties rescuing babies! It didn't look like any of the seemingly limitless stockpile of babies was injured though. ACTION!!! So was it good? No, not really, but ACTION! I didn't even really enjoy the silliness until the second half, but once I thought about it damn that would have been a fun movie to have been making fun of from the start. Maybe it's because it's early, maybe it's because I just watched possibly more Chinese people gunned down than there were minutes in the film (squared) but my god I think you'll have fun watching this movie in the right mindset. After all, what's better than grenade launchers acting like pump action shotguns? Or what about pump action shotguns that make whatever they hit explode? How about motorcyclists with uzis? Eye shooting? Blood splatter on babies getting mopped off in a tender moment?!?!?! Action. So... much... action... I won't believe people have to reload a gun (unless they're shooting at good guys!) for at least a week. On a website dedicated to movie body counts it's ranked #3, losing to two of the three lord of the rings-es, but I assure you Hard Boiled has none of that epic battle nonsense where kill count rains from the sky. Bullets fly, people die, especially if they come into contact with babies.
Reviews
3 Reviews
Ghost Rider
(2007)
Literally a Comic Book with a Flicker Rate and Sound.
6 March 2007
Ghost Rider had something none of the other, recent comic book movies had - the feeling that you were really watching a comic book. When you watch Spiderman, you can forget that this was once stationary drawings and just appreciate the movie. I didn't find that to be the case with Ghost Rider. The lines seemed like they were lifted right off the page, and while the actors all did good jobs with their delivery, there is a factor of just being silly (think R2D2 in Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith). The action sequences are also a lot like a comic book - in that it's got dialog and specific actions placed with higher importance than good clean action. That having been said, it was fun to watch, it just wasn't breathtaking or spectacular in the slightest. Nicholas Cage was also the perfect person to play Ghost Rider, and he fits the part in both looks and attitude. Six out of ten for being watchable and enjoyable, but no immersion and a lot of mediocre qualities.
Blood and Chocolate
(2007)
Mediocrity at its finest.
28 January 2007
Well, it was neither the worst nor the best movie I've ever seen. It was a testament to movies that you should watch as a last resort when browsing your rental place. Parts of it truly bugged me, like the unparalleled clarity to the viewer of what any rational human being would do, but, if you're fairly consistent about ignoring rationality, it shouldn't be a problem. I'm told that this movie didn't follow the book (the friend who accompanied me rather vehemently pointed out differences). It's hard to really point out what was wrong with this movie: the acting wasn't terrible, the characters were fine (albeit a little weak), and the story was sound. However, it just leaves you unsatisfied at the end, and you find yourself chuckling at some of the effects. It was nothing special, but it's not the worst movie either.
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