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Reviews
Everybody Loves Raymond: The Shower (2003)
Only Respond to What You've Been Asked
Too drunk to drive, Debra falls asleep in her car waiting for husband Raymond to give her a ride home. A police officer knocks on her window, and asks if she's "alright." Debra blurts out that she "may have had too much to drink." The officer is left to wonder why a drowsy person who admits to have been drinking is seated in the driver's seat of a car with the key in the ignition.
Debra is taken into custody.
By volunteering at the outset that she was probably drunk, Debra freed the officer from having to probe deeper into the situation, and subsequently removed any outs Debra might have used later. Either out of fear or stupidity--or, maybe, a little of both--her presence of mind went AWOL.
When someone asks us if we know what time it is, the only response should be "Yes, I do," not "It's 4:15."
The Andy Griffith Show: The Wedding (1968)
Poetic Justice
Finally being freed from the smothering attention of his mother, Howard is intent on beginning a new lifestyle in his own bachelor pad. He reconfigures the living room into a poor man's Playboy den, replete with dimestore native American, floor pillows, dimmed lighting and bear skin rug. After Andy, Goober and Emmett drop by to observe the new digs, Howard announces an inaugural "singles bash" for Saturday night, and Emmett tells him to count him and his wife, Martha, in.
Howard painfully explains that the initial party is for singles-only, then proceeds to invite Andy, his main squeeze, Helen Crump, and Goober to the gathering, fending off Emmett's attempts to join in anyway.
Predictably, neither Howard or Goober come close to getting a date, and are left to make the best of the Swiss cheese sandwiches, soft drinks and abstract art paintings that Howard picked up in Mt. Pilot. As Andy and Helen arrive as the only "singles couple" of the night, Andy's contempt for Howard is palpable. Clearly, it's difficult to see how Emmett and Martha would have clashed very much with the ever-taciturn and conservative Mayberry sheriff and prissy grade-school teacher, never of whom could be confused with Sean and Madonna.
Lacking two dance partners, Goober and Howard end up hoofing poor, but good-natured, Helen into the ground, with Andy having to declare an early curfew at 9:00 pm. As Howard makes one final attempt to unload his rapidly molding Swiss cheese sandwiches on his three weary guests, Emmett bursts into the house, asks why the party is breaking up so early, then proceeds to reinvigorate the evening by exhibiting his well-honed dancing prowess, sparing Howard the embarrassment of a busted evening and--perhaps more importantly--leveling his exalted opinion of his newfound manhood and modus vivendi.
The Andy Griffith Show: Opie's Piano Lesson (1967)
Path of least resistance
Quite aside from the whole matter of why Opie doesn't simply inform his father of the sudden emergence of a former NFL star to coach his youth football team, there's the perplexing issue of how Opie can be oblivious to being his team's quarterback prior to wanting to take piano lessons. The team is clearly established with adult supervision, notwithstanding its somewhat ragtag appearance.
While the episode itself is marginally entertaining, it gives the impression that Opie is either scatterbrained or unwilling to confront what ultimately amounts to a scheduling conflict, electing to fabricate excuses to delay his piano lessons.