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Reviews
Speak No Evil (2024)
A masterclass in McAvoy Gurning
Well, this isn't awful. In summary, a slow start, bit boring, then reasonably tense.
The story unfolds in a relatively predictable way. At the start, James McAvoy keeps things reasonably dialled down, everybody else manages to be suitably irritating. Whilst the acting is fine, I'm not sure whether it's the writing, directing or storyline itself, but none of the characters evoke much sympathy - a bit of an issue when you want to engage an audience.
As the film progresses, so does McAvoy's gurning and general hyperactivity. The rest of the cast also notch things up, but not to McAvoy level.
Without spoilers - the plot follows an expected line, there's no mystery (which is a pity) but the end of the film provides a decent level of tension, although disbelief must be suspended - I'm afraid I laughed in the final scenes, as it almost became a comic parody - but I think the rest of the people In the cinema were engaged.
In conclusion, if you fancy a little bit of tension and like McAvoy, this film maybe worth a shot....
Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024)
Hit and miss.
A curate's egg of a film. The original Beetljuice, was a bit different and quite quirky, This one seeks to play on that - using a number of the original cast. It really is hit and miss, with some nice, even funny scenes, but other parts fall flat. This is not a deep and meaningful treatise on the meaning of life, but I was hoping for something a little "more", especially from Tim Burton, whose work I like.
The standout Michael Keaton, he slips effortlessly back in to character. Catherine O'Hara retains some of the original eccentricity of her role
bur, unfortunately, Winona Ryder and Jenna Ortega are so bland in their roles, they could have been AI/CGI, and it would have made little difference. Justin Theroux tries really hard...
There's little point in discussing the writing or storyline, but there are a couple of very good and memorable scenes, where Burton displays his magic. It's worth a trip, but don't go with expectations that it's as good as the original.
Kneecap (2024)
Uplifting, challenging, and entertaining.
This is an excellent and challenging film, but I expect may be challenging for some of those from the various Irish and Northern Irish communities - which I'm not. I should also add it's not for people who find the idea of prolific drug use/references and sting language offensive - if you're one of those, don't see this.
Is absolutely does help to have a little familiarity with the history of the troubles etc, but this film can also be viewed without that - it's a banging story about struggle and music, and almost feels like a really edgy, far more political reimagining of the Commitments - for the modern audience.
The music is excellent, whether you understand Irish or not (I don't). One of the reasons I went is because I'd heard a couple of tracks form Kneecap and really liked them - I'm in my mid 60's, so this isn't just for those under 20.
The story, acting, direction and script all come together in a really enjoyable and, ultimately, uplifting.
The Crow (2024)
Surprisingly thought provoking and worth seeing.
I was genuinely surprised by this film - in a good way. It was more thought provoking, better written and directed than I'd anticipated.
At the heart of this film, is essentially a modern, dark, Romeo and Juliet. There are supernatural elements, but these aren't overdone. The violence is manifest, but handled in an almost operatic way - certainly choreographed well.
Bill Skarsgård, definitely has presence on the screen, bringing a depth to a character that could, so easily, have been a vacuous, vengeful killer - the film and Skarsgård, avoid that - I suppose that is down to good direction, and high production values - it's well filmed. FKA Twigs provides decent support too, the rest of the cast also make a decent fist of things.
Whilst, to a degree, it's a predictable plot and belief needs to be suspended, there is a sensitivity to this film which, I think, raises it above other films of this genre.
I am a cynic, and generally am a bit "meh" about horror (if that's what this is) or romance (if that's what this is), but this film kept me more engrossed than I expected and, I think, is well worth a view.
Alien: Romulus (2024)
Decent, exciting but could have been better/better edited
I've enjoyed all of the Alien films (yep, including Alien V Predator and the Prometheus spin offs) so was looking forward to this. It was good, but could have been better. There's a fair level of tension and excitement and for those that like the Alien films, this is definitely with seeing.
I appreciate the numerous references to other films in the franchise during this film, but think they were overdone - to the point they slightly undermined this contribution - a good story should have the legs to stand alone, and I think this film should have been allowed to try and do that.
Not withstanding my first comment, Fede Alvarez, does a good job of keeping a level of authenticity to the feel and look of the early films, but the xenomorph is now becoming a bit predictable and familiar, so looses a bit of the dread involved.
The script (not that important in a film like this), the plot and the characterisation are decent. The cast, generally, make a fist of the material they have. The exception to this is David Jonsson, who does a really good job of playing an android with an iffy personality.
The editing isn't fab and, without giving anything away, the film either lasts too long, or the last part almost seems a predictable afterthought, and really could have been merged in to the film more smoothly, or missed off altogether.
As I said at the start, this is a good, exciting film and worth seeing, but could have been better.
Trap (2024)
A mix of cliche, predictability and nepotism
When you want a film that doesn't involve thinking, and takes you away from reality, it should be an advantage that the writer/Director avoids too much work on a plot, and isn't too bothered about characterisation beyond shallow. And, add to that a hefty chunk of nepotism (Saleka Shyamalan is a lead character) and you have a recipe for a film that really misses the target.
This is a film of two halves, one that is vaguely irritating, and the other which is better, but meanders as if the Writer lost their way (they did). This isn't a spoiler, but I would have hoped for better plot twists - all foreseeable.
The acting is ok - although strangely wooden. Josh Hartnett grimaces and stares appropriately, and his maniacal tick is straight from the Beginner's Book of Cliched Serial Killers. The role of Lady Raven just seems to be a vehicle for the Director's daughter to get some exposure. I think the poor characterisation is partly down to a poor script, and predictable, characters.
The best thing I can say about this film is that it's not awful. It's a real pity,because in the hands of a better Director and Writer, this could have been a great film - indeed Shyamalan in his early career would have got it right.
Deadpool & Wolverine (2024)
Written by an MCU fan taking too much caffeine and laxative
I liked the Deadpool films and the Wolverine films. And I don't find Ryan Reynolds too irritating. However, this film. This film feels like it was conceived and written by an MCU fan, who drank far too much caffeine and eat far too much laxative- and this film was the result.
Reynolds just does Reynolds, so the snarky 4th wall stuff is exciting acted and predictable. Hugh Jackman seems, conversely, to take things far too seriously, so the juxtaposition of the two really grates.
The ret in f the film is just a mess of ideas and vague storylines. The CGi is decent, but the script, partly because Reynolds eats it, is entirely forgettable. The one decent highlight is Emma Corrin as the baddy, she deserves her own shot at a film.
The film was a mildly diverting 2 hours out of the rain.
Twisters (2024)
A dud so heavy it would never be blown away.
Oh my lord! This film could be classified as such a dud that it would never leave the ground, no matter how strong the wind, or so superficial that a small cloud of flatulence would waft it away in to the ether. Either way I was stunned by how bad it was. I have to say I went to see it with low expectations, but it didn't even reach those. I stayed to the end in the belief it was a comedic spoof and a comment on the film industry or society in the USA, but it appears it was, indeed, a serious attempt at a film about storm chasers.
The plot and script appear to have been culled from an internet search for "cliched, predictable, plots" and " lessons in mediocre script writing".
The characterisation was laughable - so stereotypical, it was clear that the characters were drawn up in almost 20 seconds. I felt sorry for the actors, who must have gone home each day and cried into their pillows, with the material they had to work with.
The music, and a lot of the film, were so jingoistic, I expect even the most patriotic American may have felt a bit hit between the eyes by it.
The special effects weren't that special - a pity, because the film would have benefited from good effects.
I'm sure there will be people who love this film. For them I am tempted to make a joke about a lot of hot air - but I won't.
Longlegs (2024)
Are all American homes badly lit with brown decor?
So, tell me, are all American homes ill lit, with brown decor? It seems a theme to all recent American films. Please America, get some decent lighting in your homes and treat yourselves to some nice paint/ wall coverings.
Anyway, to Longlegs, despite the above, the film is well shot, atmospheric, drab, and there is a good conceit to the story line. Maika Monroe is convincingly other worldly - making one wonder whether she has ever smiled. It's fun, although I do wonder whether Nic Cage as an evil Ronald McDonald, was the intention? I do think the budget should have been extended to his prosthetic face. As always, Mr Cage gives his role 10+ levels of hysteria, could have done with a notch or two down to deliver real menace, still you do know what you're going get with a Nic Cage film, and he fulfils his side of the bargain ( see the film to understand both side of this).
The film is a little predictable, which is a pity (hence my mark above), but well worth a punt.
MaXXXine (2024)
Bacon hams it up.
I was expecting a schlock horror, but what I got was surprisingly entertaining.
Mia Goth was very good as the lead. The plot didn't twist in the way I expected, which was a good thing. The gore was balanced and not over the top.
Kevin Bacon hammed it up a bit, but clearly enjoyed his role (A bacon and ham roll?). A really sleazy character who stole the scenes he was in.
Giancarlo Esposito added his usual gravitas, despite the worst wig this century - it could have a horror film all of its own.
The film moves at a good pace, not particularly tense, scary or indeed gory, but enjoyable and worth a view.
Kinds of Kindness (2024)
Pretentious Twaddle
I sat through about 90% of this film until I realised that what I was feeling wasn't intellectually challenged, what I was feeling was that this film is a load of pretentious, self indulgent, twaddle.
The cast is reasonably stellar - Dafoe, Stone, Plemons. It's in three parts - which I assume are meant to have some sort of thematic thread running through them - but other than sheer awfulness, that theme was beyond me. Insofar as script and acting went - well both of those happened and I'm sure a lot of effort went in to them, but why anybody funded this, other than on the back of the "success " of Poor Things is beyond me - maybe it looked good as an idea on paper.
I do like to be challenged and, sometimes made to feel uncomfortable when I go to see a film, and the three vignettes that make up this film are certainly challenging. However, even stand alone, they are really hard work - they each shock and have reasonably original stories, but good grief, talk about a film maker self stimulating through their own art - this one really takes the biscuit for that practice.
I am sure that some will feel that this is a masterpiece, but, as you may have worked out, I'm not one of them.
A Quiet Place: Day One (2024)
The cat should be nominated for an award.
As a musical comedy, this falls flat - which is a pity, because it also does as a horror, sci-fi, drama or any other type of film.
Let's get this out of the way first - the cat is the star, the human actors are mostly incidental. I like cats, but from the very first moment I had a feline (pun intended) that I wanted it torn limb from limb. The cat had the role of the cutesy kid, that usually appears in films like this - it's lazy film making, and whilst there isn't much of a script (of course) - as a plot device it's just irritating.
Lupita Nyong'o and Joseph Quinn do what they can to appear more important and relevant than the cat, but due to a really poor and vapour thin plot, don't succeed.
I know this film was meant to have tension and, possibly, touch heart strings, but failed to do so. One of my measures of how good a film is, is how much the audience stay still, get up to the loo - and even though the cinema wasn't that full, judging on this measure, no one was really engaged.
Whilst the creatures and central premise are decent, the rest of the film rates as a "meh" - although maybe the cat should be nominated for an award?
The Bikeriders (2023)
An homage to Homer Simpson's Hell's Satans
I'm a fan of the Simpsons and right through this film I kept on thinking of Homer's gang - Hell's Satans. I'm afraid that took a little of the edge off for me.
The film is clearly a homage to The Wild One etc and does a decent job of evoking the period - although a little anachronistic, as whilst set in the late 60s and early 70s, harked back to the 50s.
The three lead actors - Jody Comer, Tom Hardy and Austin Butler, carry the film well their acting (and accents) we're good. Supporting actors were also good. The story and the script were ok and, based on a book by a photojournalist.
Overall a decent stab (pun intended) at an homage to earlier biking films - and an absorbing watch.
The Watchers (2024)
Go and stare out of a window instead
Like a football match, this film is a game of two halves. The first half is mostly mediocre, the second half is truly awful.
Let's get this out of the way first - the film plays on the name of - Shyamalan - his daughter Ishana. Based on this, maybe she should try a different industry?
The film starts with a decent conceit, there's a little tension and some nice ideas. However, the script is poor, and the tension dissipates - frankly none of the characters are well drawn. The actors do the best with the material they've been given.
I'm a fan of fantasy but, frankly, the second half of the film feels like a poorly constructed afterthought, and is more irritating than anything else.
Given the role of the mirrored window, the window should get a credit in the film too - you'd be best advised to go and stare out of one, than see this film.
Sting (2024)
The web strikes back
I'm an arachnophobe, so went to see this with a little trepidation.
When I say this is about a giant spider, it's also about a collection of clichéd misfits. It's fun, done with real enthusiasm and not a little sense of humor.
There's lots of nods to previous films of this ilk (Arachnophobia). The cast, especially the leads (Alyla Brown and Ryan Corr), take this seriously which actually adds to the sense of fun. Sting is well rendered and its added quirk of a sound mimic is great.
If you have a few hours and are bored, this is worth seeing. It's not scary and, whilst predictable, has a beginning, middle and, possibly, an end....
Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (2024)
Entertaining, but odd
Ok, it's worth seeing this film just for Hemsworth hamming it up. It's true to the Fury Road theme, and is certainly entertaining.
However, there's an oddness about this film (apart from Anya Taylor-Joy - who seems to rely on staring a lot), some of the visual effects were speeded up. Now, this may have been deliberate to make the film more comic-like, or it may have been a device to indicate time speeding, or it may just have been poor editing - but I found it irritating and distracting from the film. And, as well as this, the film (as with most releases at the moment) was over long and could have been 20 minutes shorter.
As I say at the start, this film is entertaining, just make sure you have a bit of food, stare back at Anya Taylor-Joy, and ignore the speeded up bits if you suffer from dizziness.
Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024)
Well, it wasn't awful, but.....
Well, it wasn't awful, but it did feel like a 90 minute film stretched to well over two hours.
The CGI is tremendous, and is photo realistic, but the plot is stretched out and makes the film feel like it's two stories concatenated. Almost buy one, get one free - whether you like it or not.
I suppose the "acting" is decent and the script definitely existed. Indeed, there were even a few tense moments. However, not only is it necessary to suspend disbelief (after all this is a fantasy film) but, at some points, it needed to be tied up, tortured and then sedated.
Having said all of that, it was mildly entertaining, but what did hack me off was the fact that from very early on a sequel was telegraphed, which led to a sense of irritation throughout.
As with a lot of franchises, the original was so much more intelligent and thought provoking.
Love Lies Bleeding (2024)
A strangely refreshing and engaging film.
Well, even though Kristen Stewart only has three facial expressions - wet Sunday afternoon, miserable, and toilet smile - this is surprisingly good movie - there, I've committed that comment to writing.
The film is definitely noir, with Ed Harris and Katy O'Brian adding some additional depth and character range. Ed Harris is particularly good as a psychopath with a must-see hair style. The plot, whilst a little slow to get going, and with only a smidgen of cliches, works well and actually had me engaged. The writing and Direction are decent, without feeling too heavy or overwrought.
There is a slight weirdness, and I did think, for a moment the film might loose its way with a Bruce Banner scene but, actually, it worked and showed some humor beneath the darkness.
A strangely refreshing and engaging film.
The Fall Guy (2024)
Awful beyond words (except the ones below).
I appreciate that both studios and stars want to maximize income and profit, and that sometimes a star vehicle film is cynically made, but this film is, by far, the most cynical and irritating piece of tat I've seen in years. Unfortunately it's not in the "so bad, it's good" class of films, it's in the "so bad, it's the most irritating film that your likely to see in a long time, so really don't bother" category. Indeed, even if you are a masochist, you'd be upset at the level of mediocrity, self knowing in-jokes and, quite frankly, self indulgent piece of twaddle, that is this film.
I have nothing against Reynolds's or Blunt, and have enjoyed films that they have been in, but this risible piece of junk should be put out of our misery and quietly disposed of, after its run, and all those involved allowed a chance to remove it from their CVs.
Having said that, I'm sure there will be people out there who enjoy this. If there are, we should pray for them.
Abigail (2024)
A lot of fun - worth seeing.
This is fun - almost in the style of Hammer. It's gory, but not scary. A clichéd plot and characters, but directed and acted with enthusiasm, and a good nod to classic vampire films. All the references were there, we were just missing Vincent Price and Christopher Lee and an over-coloured palette.
There was a tongue in cheek patina right across the film. I'm not sure why it was rated 18 in the UK - unless to protect people with an aversion to tomato sauce. The gore was done with explosive fun - a real splat fest.
This was surprisingly entertaining, done with gusto. Absolutely worth 90 minutes.
Seize Them! (2024)
Why?
Why?
This would have been a fun film for youg (ish) kids, so why add swearing - there really was no need and it's not the sort of film that would appeal to an older audience - although, because of the swearing, it's rated 15. Having said that I laughed twice.
I can confirm that there was a plot, there was acting and, possibly, some direction. It felt like a prolonged TV sketch - put in the rack and tortured, until it was mistakenly let go.
I am mystified why this was released into cinemas - maybe to test its commercial viability, but as I was the only person in the cinema the answer to that is clear.
Civil War (2024)
A monumental "meh"
Well, it might just be me, and that I'm not that close to the American political landscape, only being aware of its acute dichotomy, but I found this film peculiarly boring and un-involving. The real civil we war was between my inclination to leave before the end and toughing it out - I did the latter.
The plot was predictable, with very few surprises - the script may well have taken nearly a full hour to write. The acting reached adequate, although the actors had to deal with clichéd charters. The only thing missing from the (again clichéd) central group of photo/journalists, was a cute dog.
This wasn't bad enough to be terrible which, in some ways, is a pity, as that would have been better.
A monumental "meh".
The First Omen (2024)
Would have been more entertaining with comedy music
Always a risk to prequel an existing classic, and this was also released soon after Immaculate (could equally have been called Immaculate 2 - Losing of the Plot).
If this film had comedy music in the background, it would have been far more entertaining. Whilst some heavyweight actors (C. Dance, B. Nighy) are in this, don't be fooled, it barely reaches B film. Full of Antichrist tropes (and tripes) I was alternatively bored and having to stifle laughter. Far more terrifying was how much popcorn the two ladies along the row from me managed to eat during the film.
Just don't. There are worse films, but they really shouldn't have bothered.
Monkey Man (2024)
Excellent revenge thriller with a cultural twist
Really worth going to see. What's refreshing about this film are the different cultural references and underlying social commentary. Don't get me wrong, this is a violent revenge thriller with all the gore and comic book violence one would expect, but it is different and very entertaining.
As for the Direction - as far as I'm aware this is Dev Patel's debut (apologies if that's wrong) - it works. My only criticism is that sometimes things are too frenetic and get in the way. I think we're at the start of the career of a major Director here.
The plot is effective, but is a little predictable- again Patel's writing debut - and a good one for that.