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Lisa Frankenstein (2024)
More Like Frankensteen
Some call this horror. Eh. Sure, there are horror elements and if this is a horror, so is the inspired 1980's Heathers.
If this had been made in the year it's set (1989,) surely Tim Burton would've directed Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp as the leads and Jennifer Connelly as the costar/sister role. This has all of them written all-over-it.
Also, I was alive and coming of age during 1989. THIS was more like 1985 or even earlier 80s. By 1989, we were at the edge of the grunge period. These styles/clothes/attitudes definitely early 80s. But I digress. That's not the real issue here.
The title is. It's Frankenstein...light. Like very, very adjacent. That said, I guess in a world that Twilight exists and that's so far removed from vampires, I suppose we can use one or two elements of the Frankenstein story for this dark romcom.
Lisa is misunderstood and maybe more intense than most give her credit for. When she falls for a long-since deceased young male around her age, luck is on her side when lightning awakens him from his slumber. Will he fall for her and if so, who will pay the price?
All I had to see in the opening credits was that Diablo "Juno" Cody wrote this to know what I was getting myself into. To her credit, she has an extreme style that is unmistakable. I happen to like her writing, but here...
Well, it's not bad. It's just...there. I laughed some, but not a lot. I did like the chemistry between the leads and even though the 80s feel was way too much like The Goldbergs and practically every other 80s nostalgia over the past decade plus, I didn't mind it. I don't think, by this point, it's at all original or groundbreaking. But it is watchable.
It might need a second viewing to rise above the mediocre 5/10 stars I gave it. Unfortunately, I really don't have that much of an urge to revisit this. I just wish this would've been made in 1989. It may have been perfect back then and an instant classic.
Especially with the cast I pointed out.
***
Final Thoughts: In my fantasy theory above for who would've started in the 1989 version of this, I would also suspect Winona Ryder would've auditioned for the lead, or sister part and be turned down. Not to worry, though. Burton would've made up for this oversight by casting her with Depp in the similar Edward Scissorhands the year after.
Late Night with the Devil (2023)
Could It Be...Say-tin?
The Seventies horrors were already creepy, by nature. This rerun of sorts just keeps that tradition alive.
With a true renaissance in horror this past decade, with quite possibly some of the best horror movies produced EVER, I had high expectations and desires for Late Night with the Devil. Annnd, I was NOT let down.
This movie was as disturbing as it was extremely intriguing to watch. As captivating as it was inventive. And as original as it's a classic. I couldn't look away, much like the audience this host wants to provoke.
A 1970s late night TV host, second to Heeere's Johnny, plans to celebrate his Hallowleen proving/disproving the existence of Satan in a young girl. All for ratings/sweep week. Good luck to him, the audience and his guests. They'll need it.
This was so well written, so well shot and so well paced, this probably could've went on for another hour and our eyes would've continued to be glued to the set. Be that as it may, the 90-minutes is just perfect. PLEASE, despite the deep story with many unanswered questions/subplots, NO sequel. This is perfect as is.
I'd be hard pressed not to see this in my top 10, maybe top 5 of 2024. I'd say I wish they made more horror movies like this, but they have. Not EXACTLY like this - as stated, this is wildly original. It's just that over the past 10 years I've been very pleased with groundbreaking and refreshingly new horror films. And this Late Night movie I watched is no exception.
Keep it up, creative filmmakers - from Hollywood to Australia, to South Korea and beyond.
***
Final Thoughts: Now I look forward to diving into all the twists and turns, background/breakdowns and ending explained by the critics/film buffs on YouTube. I wonder how many will compare this to Jordan Peele's Nope like I did.
Night Swim (2024)
Rub a Dub Dud
So, this *isn't* a follow-up to M. Night's Lady in the Water?
One thing my dad used to tell me that rings so true: whenever Hollywood over-advertises a movie, it's gonna be bad. (Also true, whenever they dump movies into January, it's equally bad.) And I saw trailers CONSTANTLY for this first weekend-of-the-year release. But, is it as bad as everyone claims?
Yeah, and no. I mean, it's not great or even good or even a recommendation. It's just not the worst I've ever seen. And I have seen pool-centered horror movies before. This just feels like a second-draft script. Not at all fleshed out with many threads left unfinished.
As with most supernatural movies, this too involves a family moving into a cursed place. What's the twist here? The "ghosts" (?) just hang out by the pool. Our "hero" cliché family here suspect it isn't safe to go into the water, so why not have a pool party?
I do my VERY best to go in as cold to any movie I have an interest in seeing, but I couldn't avoid seeing the ratings for this 2024 recent release. And because of that, I kept expecting this movie to nosedive after the initial premise is revealed. It never really did, though that script felt...awkward. I think there was a solid movie the filmmakers/writer wanted to make and instead, they were forced to kept to a set schedule without reshoots/test screenings.
As stated above, I wouldn't recommend it. It's not even so bad-it's good. It's just meh.
***
Final Thoughts: One horror/thriller I enjoyed WAY more about a swimming pool was aptly called "The Pool" from 2018. It's not perfect and held the same kind of critical criticism as this movie and yet, it was still entertaining, a way better plot/fleshed out script and kept me engaged to the end.
Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972)
Children?
The title strongly resembles that Steve Buscemi GIF: "How do you do, fellow kids?" in which a 55-year-old plays a high schooler. THESE AREN'T CHILDREN.
Yes, the film's "main character," some kind of film/stage Director, calls his cast and crew "children." They're as much children as Biden's the youngest ever President.
I only chose this movie as I distinctly recall seeing this VHS cover many times as a kid looking through the horror movies I was never allowed to rent. I haven't even thought of this movie in decades, and considering it's from the early 1970s with a title as such, I thought it would be super creepy.
It was super dumb, instead. Like really bad. But I will give it to them: the ending was kinda, sorta, maybe not really worth getting through 60ish minutes of awful "humor" to get to. At least they made an effort in the climax.
Said "Director" brings his cast/crew to some remote island to dig up bodies and preform both satanic rituals and practical jokes. Some of the people object, some act like "children" and have fun. Unfortunately, for them, they might as well be shooting a documentary.
Sadly, this movie does, indeed, suck, but at least they were somewhat trying to make a Night of the Living Dead rip-off with comedy bits throughout. As stated, most of the effort was in the third act with, I guess, some good practical zombie makeup/effects. And I did like the very ending's idea, though, like most everything else, it came out unintentionally hilarious.
Can't recommend. I don't even know if anyone else in the world, sans like 3 people, even heard of this or even saw it when it came out.
***
Final Thoughts: By the way, that Steve Buscemi GIF NEVER ceases to crack me up. Quite the opposite for this "horror-comedy."
Poor Things (2023)
Actually, It's Pretty Rich
Well, this is odd. I believe this is the first movie I've ever seen where I loved the Second Act over the First and Third ones.
But, that's not all that's original. Despite this being a Frankenstein-Inspired-Tale, this has to end somewhere high on my all-time most original movies I've ever seen.
I have very few criticisms here, so I'll get these out of the way first. The opening was a little rough for me and I needed a lot more patience than I'm accustomed to, to get through to the aforementioned better Act. And speaking of which, even the best section of the film had a very slowed down portion towards the end of Act Two. Plus, the climax seemingly introduced a whole new storyline that also had to be settled. Yes, this was hinted throughout, but it still felt tacked on for additional conflict.
(Don't get me wrong, I did like that relatively-new subplot and definitely its conclusion. It just felt odd to place it there.)
Okay, the rest, I Loved. From the acting to the marvelous costumes, set pieces, cinematography and absolutely how it was shot. (More so in the first half vs. The last half. Still, overall, great.) I'm not much into period-piece or fantasy films - this is both, by a mile, and yet, I was enthralled and fully invested once it got going.
Slow, but growing Belle is someone who's maturity level does NOT match her adult body. We'll follow her as she evolves into womanhood and maybe others around her will learn right alongside her.
I was as basic with that synopsis as possible as it's truly best to go in freezing cold. It's a great journey to take with Belle and it's nice to say that with sincerity since that dang Twilight series hit theatres.
While I loved Oppenheimer and believe it deserved a lot of its awards, I do disagree this didn't win Best Cinematography. And yes, Emma Stone earned her Oscar. I just happened to love how this was shot and how richly original this was even over her performance.
Can't recommend this movie more...with one stipulation. You really, REALLY need to love cinema. This isn't for everyone as it's pretty darn weird and even though it's very easy to follow, the style and oddness might turn off the mainstream audiences. Especially those who just go to the 2-3 Marvel movies in theatres per year.
***
Final Thoughts: Oh, and yeah, forgot to mention - can't believe this wasn't NC-17. This was basically soft-core. Sooo much nudity (male and female) and tons of sex scenes. If this bothers you, or if you're planning a family movie night, fair warning.
It Lives Inside (2023)
It Follows Slimer's Hunger Pains
Don't be fooled like me; for every When Evil Lurks and Talk to Me, there's a It Lives Inside. I guess we can't appreciate the greats without knowing the opposite.
Actually, to be fair, this movie isn't the worst I've seen...it's just plain okay. It's wildly unoriginal and brings so incredibly little to the table, you'll need to leave your brain at the door for multiple reasons. And still, if you like these kinds of supernatural stalker movies, you might feel at home here.
High School Sam inadvertently releases a demon who chases/taunts her and she'll have to use clues and others to figure out how to stop this before it's too late. Sound familiar? Like really familiar?
The acting's okay, the filming is acceptable and creature effects, while very pumpkinheadish, is just fine. I mean, there's inferior horror films out there, but why settle for mediocre or less?
Not recommended. If you're interested in a great Demon-Coming-After-You 2023 release, just see the masterful Talk to Me. Or elevated in When Evil Lurks. (I'd suggest that one above all horror from 2023 and even in recent years.)
Sucks, too. I really wanted to see this, just based on the poster and 2022-2023's track record for incredible horror releases. I was fooled...so now you don't have to be.
***
Final Thoughts: I will give one great positive: I LOVED the end credits song. Didn't really fit the rest of the movie, but at least it ended with a great distraction from what I just witnessed. (Mallrats' "Teeth.")
Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024)
Minus A Whole Bunch
Normally, when a so-so sequel comes out, it generally makes me want to go home and watch one of the better entries. This one just caused me to want to revisit any of the Godzilla films featured on MST3k.
I swear, these MonsterVerse films get more progressively dumb as they proceed. Okay, they're dumb-fun, just...not *that* much fun anymore.
Excluding entry #2, Kong: Skull Island and the 2023 fantastic Apple TV series, Monarch: Legacy of Monsters, each chapter sinks deeper and deeper into the Middle Earth of realism. They might as well just animate these movies since they're so far from reality and the stakes couldn't be lower.
Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire begs you to leave your brain at the door. Basically, there's a new (old?) threat to both of the title characters and the bad boys, bad boys, what are they gonna do? All-but high-five and fight. Duh.
I wouldn't go as far to say this movie's bad...IF you don't take it seriously for one minute. It's also not a so-bad-it's-good. It's just there for those who want to see big monsters fight.
Admittedly, my expectations couldn't be lower, namely when Baby Kong showed up in the trailers and he looked like he crawled right out of a Super Nintendo. (Spoiler: his graphics didn't improve in the final product and BY FAR was the worst CGI in the entire franchise.) So, the movie could literally go only up from what I predicted. And it did.
Mostly ANY Kong scene was worthy of a watch. And mind you, NOT when any human did something to him - I only mean when he was away from all humans and on his own adventures.
Funny, I grew up on Godzilla movies and loved them as a kid. I couldn't get enough and while I respected King Kong and loved his three standalone movies (from 1933, 1976 and 2005, forgetting all the other "sequels/crossovers,") Godzilla was my jam. In this MonsterVerse, it's the opposite. Kong is definitely King throughout.
Luckily, I was able to separate my recent LOVE and AWE for Godzilla Minus One when I watched this latest King of the Monsters film. Yes, they're from separate universes, but comparing them is like asking which is better: Bram Stoker's Dracula and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter or Bride of Frankenstein and I, Frankenstein. You know one's great and the other silly.
While this ranks dead-last in the MonsterVerse (see below,) it's still worthy of a watch. It's harmless and may even develop into a drinking game every time you have to say to yourself: "Yeah, right" or "Really? Seriously?"
***
Final Thoughts: My MonsterVerse Ranking:
1. Kong: Skull Island (2017)
2. Monarch: Legacy of Monsters (2023)
3. Godzilla (2014)
4. Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
5. Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)
6. Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024)
Kôkaku kidôtai (1995)
Shell-Shocked
I can see *I* wasn't the target audience since it's been a long time since I've been a teenage boy. (But, even when I was.......)
Unfortunately, the only place to watch this online was PlutoTV which had commercials EVERY 11 Minutes without fail. I guess you could say there were as many commercials as there were scenes of full-frontal female nudity.
I'm probably not the best to review an Anime movie as I literally can count on one-hand with 2 fingers left over how many Anime movies I've seen to date: 1988's Akira, 2001's Cowboy Bebop: The Movie and this one. And frankly, I've literally forgotten everything about those first two.
But, I did like this as weird as it was at times. I will say this though: for only being 83 minutes, it felt like it was at least HALF filled with movie exposition. This probably should've been a season of a show or even a 3-hour movie with how much Tell-Don't-Show they did. I could NOT believe how much exposition was in this plus it actually didn't help that much. By the end I never knew why Section 6 and Section 9 were fighting unless that was another sexual innuendo.
Also, I was never 100% sure who the main character was. I'm sure it's supposed to be the "Major," or Motoko Kusanagi, but honestly, she has minimal screentime or at least equal to most other major characters. This IS making me want to see the live-action version to maybe grasp more of the story from a different POV and who the main character really is. (Most likely then the "Major" since the star is Scarlett Johansson.)
To describe this movie would be hard, but in the not-too-distant future (cue MST3k intro here,) an A. I. killer is being pursued by the police...of sorts. They're cyborgs for...reasons. I'm still a little foggy about all this and I just watched this last night.
And don't let the serial killer fool you when he tells you he's NOT an A. I. He most certainly is.
I did like the style, animation and definitely the ending as the best part. In fact, that ending elevated the whole feature. Recommended, especially if you're into Anime.
Or a horny teen boy. Or really any age human who's into chicks.
***
Final Thoughts: Speaking of which, my buddy recommended this movie and I asked him if he had any other anime recommendations, only with more male nudity than female. I was never given one, sadly enough.
Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire (2024)
Busted and Broken
God, I remember when Ghostbusters used to be funny. For you yutes, that was 40-years-ago.
Never thought I'd ever say this, but 2016's Ghostbusters, the sadly unfunny reboot was WAY better than this p o s. And this didn't start off on the right foot as 5-minutes into this travesty, I already hated it.
I understand Hollywood's really trying desperately to hold onto nostalgia and legacy characters as long as they're not ghosts themselves. I just wish, like Nicole Kidman's awful AMC intro, they'd fade this chapter into the past. In fact, they've already done did this with Ghostbusters: Afterlife and introduced a slew of new/boring characters to take over the helm.
Nope, they're not done yet. Every bit of this movie is "Awww, remember when we did this (scene, music cue, bit) way better? Well, here it is again."
In this wildly dull chapter, the Ghostbustin' family is back in NYC and the same movie takes place that you saw in 1984. Only, this time with horrible and unlikeable characters who bring nothing new to the table. Also, no apologizes, I really, really hated that mother character. Just had to get that out.
This movie is uneven, badly written, edited by someone blind and is obviously missing major scenes as things just...happen. The only praise I could possibly come up with is for the criminally underused Kumail Nanjiani who always makes me, at least, chuckle. With the likes of Dan Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Patton Oswalt and Paul Rudd - all proven funny people, Nanjiani was the only one with an ounce of humor, or hope, here.
I seriously don't care of there's a part 6. I am done with this franchise. This should've died with Ghostbusters II in 1989 and even that was a few steps too far.
***
Final Thoughts: Not much of a ranking, since only one is great, but here goes:
1. Ghostbusters (1984)
2. Ghostbusters II (1989)
3. Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)
4. Ghostbusters (2016)
5. Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire (2024)
Dune: Part Two (2024)
Stay Duned for Part Three
The ironic part: I left a movie where characters are encouraged not to cry to save water and it was downpouring as I left the theatre. Bet the sand people are jealous.
I almost didn't/wouldn't see this if not for a friend not only motivating me to (just so we could discuss it,) but also because he bought my ticket. Cha-Ching! And beyond the generous gift, I am VERY grateful because I loved this movie. LOVED it.
The reason I almost didn't see it: I wasn't the biggest fan of the Original. Well, Original Part One from 2021. Actually, make that, I wasn't a fan of the Original Original from 40 years ago either. It wasn't until THIS week where I was explained everything and once I understood it, AND rewatched the 2021 1st part, did I like it.
Don't get me wrong, 2021's Part One was PAINFULLY and CRIMINALLY slow, but since I now understand the plot/character/houses, I really dug it. And Part Two...TWICE as GOOD.
It's nearly 3 hours and yet, FLIES by. So well-paced. I tend to not like 3-hour movies, but recently, they've been very well made so you don't feel the runtime. Examples, besides Dune: Part Two: Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One and Avatar: The Way of Water.
Anyways, Dune: Part Two is obviously the conclusion of the 1st storyline of "The One" to bring balance to the desert planet. It's best to watch Part One first followed by a YouTube video on "What You Need to Know Before Seeing Dune: Part Two." That and have a friend who's into the whole Dune Saga. Once you're educated, these movies totally rock.
I will say one thing that irked me, tho. As well paced as I advised, the last third seemingly felt in fast-forward. SOOO much happens in such a short time that I felt like there may have been time jumps we weren't aware of. And that's too bad. The first two acts flowed so very nicely and then bam! We're hit with basically another whole Part Three, but in under an hour.
Other than that, it would be criminal if this didn't win next year's Oscars for Best Sound, Score, Special Effects and Cinematography. I would throw in an award for Rebecca Ferguson since I'm totally biased. I'm in love with that woman and everything about her.
This truly felt like a real movie-going experience by a genuine movie lover. These are rare these days, so go out and support Hollywood love letters such as this.
***
Final Thoughts: I can't wait now for this to come out so I can spend a nice Saturday afternoon watching this mega long saga all-together.
Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023)
Loki and Subpar
Well, thank the gods its over finally.
Man, DCEU REALLY wanted to be MCU. Not sure why since, statistically, the DC films on the whole are better than the majority of the Marvel movies. This, unfortunately, isn't a good example of that opinion.
Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom is, unbelievably, an improvement over its original film. NOT by much, and it's still really bad. It's basically a five-part Saturday Morning cartoon miniseries only live-action. And by "live-action," I mean some of the faces and bodies looked real.
Instead of joining forces with, I dunno, Superman, Wonder Woman or even Batman, Aquaman turns to his "last chance," his incarcerated, criminal brother to help find/defeat part one's foe once again. Meanwhile, let's learn what it's like to be a Daddy.
Heard this story before? Oh, yeah, Thor did it several times. Heck, they even acknowledged it. My suspicion is the normally more respected director James Wan threw that in because even he was embarrassed by this mediocre superhero adventure.
To be fair, it's harmless and not the worst I've seen. I've actually watched many more MCU movies I hated more than this. It's just a chore to get through and helped me realize why us humans sincerely do have Superhero fatigue.
At least the mid-credit scene didn't sadly promise more from the DCEU.
***
Final Thoughts: In truth, I didn't want to see this. But, I'm a completist and needed to finish off the franchise with my final DCEU ranking:
1. Man of Steel (2013)
2. Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (Ultimate Edition, 2016)
3. The Flash (2023)
4. Wonder Woman (2017)
5. The Suicide Squad (2021)
6. Shazam! (2019)
7. Shazam! Fury of the Gods (2023)
8. Black Adam (2022)
9. Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020)
10. Blue Beetle (2023)
11. Suicide Squad (Extended Cut, 2016)
12. Zach Snyder's Justice League (2021)
13. Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023)
14. Aquaman (2018)
15. Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
16. Justice League (2017)
Doraibu mai kâ (2021)
Driven to Near Perfection
They definitely took me to places I hadn't seen before.
Woke too early at 6AM, saw this title/cover for a split second as part of a Movie Review vlog for another title and I was somehow drawn to it. Since it was 3-hours and I had someplace to be at 7AM, I found it on MAX and intended to only watch a couple of minutes to see if I'd like it. 35-minutes-later...I was almost late to my appointment.
I don't know what this movie had on me, but it gripped me with its realism. It felt genuine, interesting and compelling even in its everyday simplicity of a story of a famous couple's life. I was swept away in their lives.
A theatre actor/director suffers a major tragedy (well, two back-to-back) and he carries this on his shoulders into his next gig. It doesn't help he won't let people into his psyche, but when he meets his match, he might find a path to healing.
I sincerely doubt this will work for everyone and the argument could be made it was "boring" to some. Of course, I disagree, but if you're not enthralled into this world in the first act, you might want to save yourself the 3-hours.
And funny, I'm a huge advocate against 3-hour movies. I was just fascinated to see where this was going. I *wanted* to follow these characters to completion.
While the movie deals with calamity, it does speak to us on healing methods. Sometimes very directly speaks to us. I love how it's all methodically revealed and how you can live/grow right along the characters. Highly recommended.
***
Final Thoughts: One of the aspects I found compelling was the constant shift in languages (which, honestly, I would've never caught had they not told me in the subtitles.) It went from Japanese to Korean to Mandarin to Tagalog to English to even sign language...sometimes in the very same scene. I thoroughly applaud the actors in seamlessly bouncing these languages off each other, not to mention the script for its originality.
Influencer (2022)
The Talented Miss IG
You know, for being set in Thailand, there was a shocking low number of Thais around.
This was one of those movies that starts with a bang, and even hooked me with the placement/timing of opening credits. I thoroughly enjoyed the first two acts and where this was going despite not at all being 100% original. Unfortunately, while the ending was satisfactory, it all seemed to crumble in the finale.
A social media queen on extended holiday in Asia was ditched by her bf but fear not. She meets the mysterious, but overly friendly CW and who knows where this budding relationship will take them. Maybe to a deserted island without cell reception. That's gotta be killer for an Influencer...
I've actually avoided this movie since I saw its debut on Shudder two years ago. Personally, I cannot stand influencers and don't purposely follow any on any of the social media platforms. I saw one once at a Philippines restaurant at the table next to mine and pretty much lost my appetite. So, horror or not, I wasn't about to watch an entire movie centered around one.
This came highly recommended by my favorite YouTube channel, Dead Meat, so I finally decided to follow their advice. And again, for the first two acts, I was totally hooked and glad it went in a direction I didn't expect. I mean, I saw even more avenues it could've taken while improving the film even further. Regardless, it was solid for two-thirds.
Overall, it's still worth a watch and even the influencer featured had more depth than I expected. I really appreciated that as fake people, even fictional characters, are enormously hard for me to be around/watch.
***
Final Thoughts: I don't say this often, and it pains me when I have to...this should've been longer. I would've loved to see more about the characters learning more about each other before any of them were killed off. That ending was cut too short and with just a little more reveal of the antagonist/protagonists may have caused more likes/hearts/followers.
Oppenheimer (2023)
Definitely Not a Bomb
Barbenheimer, as cute as that was, shouldn't have happened. For one, it destroyed my favorite movie of 2023 (Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning) and second, this should've been a double feature, instead, with Godzilla Minus One.
This is probably the highest rating I've given to a movie I barely understood for the grand majority of screentime. But, I award it for how incredibly outstanding it was filmed. As all-over-the-place the timeline was, I instantly loved how this was shot and constructed. Of course, it's also beautifully filmed and acting was perfection. Not one of the zillion A-listers phoned it in.
Oppenheimer tells the complicated origins of the Atomic Bomb and the race to be first to wield it so the second Great War could conclude. Of course, it's not without its victims - all around and consequences.
Personally, it was a tough decision to finally watch this. Well, easy once it became free on one of the platforms I have access to. But, I hate the nuke so much, anything in reference to it depresses me. Even before this movie, I knew why we had to invent it. That doesn't excuse how terrible humans are that we needed to in the first place.
Once you open pandora's box...
At very least, my voice was heard here in this movie.
Anyways, recommended for anyone interested in this process and the time period. But, also for cinema lovers. This movie was so incredibly well made, it's hard not to put this at the top of Christopher Nolan's best films and that's not an easy decision. Plus, of all the great performances here, it has to be one of the best acting I've seen in a long while - Cillian Murphy. He literally and successfully carried the entire movie. It'd be a crime if he doesn't win Best Actor.
Additionally, it should win for Direction, Score, Sound, Screenplay, Best Supporting Actor for Robert Downey Jr, Editing and Cinematography. Wouldn't be upset with the other awards if it wins.
And thanks to the editing and pacing, those 3-hours went by much swifter than I thought possible. It wasn't the fastest 3-hour movie, heck MI7a sped by quicker, but it never dragged. Highly recommended.
***
Final Thoughts: First 2 hours, I had planned to watch one of those "ending/film explained" YouTube vids on this so I could understand more of what was going on. Mercifully, the last hour really and nicely summed up what I needed to know. Not even in plain English, but at least I was no longer 100% lost in the Science and plot.
West Side Story (1961)
Love at First Side
Well, now I know where the Pet Shop Boys got its additional lyrics from for their 1997 Somewhere song.
Aside from not really being into musicals - despite The Sound of Music and Chicago being two of my all-time favorite movies, I've always avoided this one because I simply couldn't see how gangs could be tough while ballet dancing and snapping their fingers a bunch. No offense to dancers, singers or great performers such as these artists, but that doesn't scream the macho, macho men these characters were supposed to be for me.
Also, I know it "was the times," but couldn't they find more than one Puerto Rican to fill the Sharks' shoes? This looked a lot like brown face to me.
The story is really nothing new. Like 100s of years old, even by 1961 standards. It's Romeo & Julliet - even with the time frame down pat. Oh, and two rival gangs filled with racist rage. As hopeful as this movie wants you to feel, it ends just how you know it will.
It's hard to judge this movie seeing for the first time 63 years after it debuted. For one thing, this won best picture back then, so the audience in the early 60s saw something completely different than I did in 2024.
I did like SOME of the music. Probably the ones I recognized growing up, such as "I Feel Pretty," "America," and as mentioned, "Somewhere." I was not on board with the rest. Don't get me wrong - they all sang great and the chorography was wonderful. The songs just didn't resonate with me.
I liked it fine and glad I crossed it off my bucket movie list. Unfortunately, the movie didn't really pick up for me until the third act when it finally got real and interesting. Sad it took two hours to get to the goods.
And what was with the 10-minute opening still shot? Was that normal back then?
***
Final Thoughts: "Tony! When you come, use the backdoor." ~ Maria.
Maybe I'm looking TOO deep into that line.
Feardotcom (2002)
Fear & Loathing This Nightmare
Wait. It's fear dot com dot com? Seriously?
This was made by someone who loved A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Ring, Seven and the Hellraiser direct-to-video sequels. In fact, I'm shocked this wasn't somehow turned into Hellraiser: Hell Online.
Truthfully, I never had an interest in seeing this unless I had an urge for a bad movie night. My favorite YouTube channel covered this for their podcast so I had to subject myself to this mess. Now, I can listen to said podcast and it better be worth it.
Anyone who visits, haha, fear dot com dot com, has about 48 hours before they perish and it's up to one terrible detective and the worst-ever Department of Health employee (who somehow got promoted to detective) to solve who's behind a bunch of deaths linked to this fear dot com dot com. Oh, and sleepwalking Jeffrey Combs is here to collect a paycheck.
The first half of this movie wasn't great, but not the worst I've seen. Somewhere in the middle this spiraled out of control and I have no idea how they could've messed this up any further. It just goes from bad to terrible and worse, this is probably 25 minutes longer than it needed to be.
Yes, this was made when the internet was still a baby and not everyone knew that much about "logging in" or "being online." Of course, Hollywood (and definitely Japan) would capitalize on that as they did with many more movies made about the net and even VHS tapes. Mercifully and probably the only positive I could find: it wasn't really THAT dated, aside from a few small floppy disc moments and how they perceived subscribers.
There is zero reason to log into fear dot com dot com. Unless you're like me and needed to get the scoop before logging into Dead Meat's Podcast channel.
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Final Thoughts: You could have a drinking game with how Loosey Goosey the "Department of Health" takes potential virus crises. My favorites: the Health Associate's boss casually asks if what she found at a crime scene was Eboli and she just says no. "Whew!" solved. This and her swiftly jumping into a body of water that screams disease.
Good Time (2017)
More Collateral
As dark and dreary this was, I had a much better than a Good Time watching this.
Yeah, I'm stubborn. So much so, this movie is now about 6½ years old and it's taken me this long to finally cave. Backing up, I (previously) disliked Robert Pattinson. But, to be fair, I gave him a few chances outside of the Twilight series and still didn't care for him.
People kept telling me: Well, you obviously haven't seen "Good Time." I told them, I'm done wasting my time to see what some have seen in him. Mind you, this was long before The Batman and The Lighthouse. Today, I watched two animated family movies back-to-back and I was really in the mood for an adult movie. (NO, not that kind. Lol.)
I immediately came across this on Netflix as that's where I saw the other two films. Since I have liked Pattinson now in The Lighthouse and The Batman, I didn't even hesitate to finally see what everyone was praising.
Holy moly. I need to really rethink my stubbornness. This movie was excellent as was Pattinson. While this movie deals with criminals, it was further criminal he wasn't nominated for either the Globes or Oscars for his role. This is by far his best performance.
The movie itself is also great. Felt like it could belong in the world of 2004's Collateral, but much more realistic. (Not dogging on Collateral. I not only loved that movie, but even more than this one. My point was, this felt more everyday than that movie's extraordinary circumstances.)
One brother's bright idea is to rob a bank and he needs his brother who has intellectual disabilities to aid him. After that goes sideways and fast, the dominate brother's life spins wildly out of control in the course of about 20 some hours as he tries to fix things. Needless to say, it's anything but a Good Time.
I try to be as vague as possible in the synopsis I provide in my reviews as I personally love to go into movies as cold as possible and would like to provide the same for my readers. What I said above is about 3% of the entire story. I implore you, like others did to me: You just need to see this. Especially if you're a movie-lover.
While I definitely disliked Pattinson's character, I was thoroughly invested to see how his night panned out. And believe me, there are some incredibly twists, situations and shocks you may not see coming. I especially loved the ending.
There are few movies I'd like to revisit these days as I always yearn to see new-to-me cinema and keep growing, learning and enjoying. I think this is one I'd like to revisit a few times to absorb it all.
And especially be re-shocked by that ending.
***
Final Thoughts: My close friends know I try and avoid trailers as best as I can. Especially and mainly for movies I have even the slightest of interest in. Reason: they not only spoil way too much, the grand majority of the time, they even show the very last scene - or spoil the ending, in general. After seeing this movie, I watched the trailer and bam, this is a prime example. It definitely shows how this story ends. Definitely do not watch the trailer before you watch this fantastic film.
Chicken Run (2000)
Flew the Coop
It's very hard for me to criticize ANY stop-motion animation and generally speaking, it's my all-time favorite kind. But, sadly, Chicken Run is one of my least favorite of the brand.
That's NOT saying it was bad, as it was still very good. I just happened to love Kubo and the Two Strings, Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit, Shaun the Sheep Movie and The Nightmare Before Christmas more. (Below is a list of my top ten favorites.)
The thing about this one, and this being my only second time viewing it in as many decades, I really didn't care that much for the first half. Sure, it was wildly entertaining, hilarious and absolutely creative, but the story was old and not fresh. Somewhere, however, in the middle, it picked way up and got me more engaged.
Chickens revolt! Either they're slaves to egg-production or they're otherwise used for...gulp...food, these chickens need to escape their concentration camp. In flies their savior, a cocky rooster who's tasked to teach chickens to fly. Will he lead them to Paradise?
Don't get me wrong, I still liked this adventure and all the VERY hard work put into it. It's a great introduction to this fantastic studio, Aardman Animations. While I haven't seen all of their films, the ones I have, I really liked to really loved. I do very much admire all the painstaking hours they must put into projects like this. Helps I'm not a fan of CGI.
I would recommend this (while it's still on Netflix) and I would recommend the follow-up, Dawn of the Nugget even more. Watch it as a double feature, like I just did as you'll be saving the best for last.
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Final Thoughts: My personal favorite Stop-Motion Animated Films:
1. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)
2. Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)
3. Kubo and the Two Strings (2016)
4. Shaun the Sheep Movie (2015)
5. Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)
6. Coraline (2009)
7. Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget (2023)
8. Frankenweenie (2012)
9. Chicken Run (2000)
10. Isle of Dogs (2018)
Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget (2023)
Dawn of the Island of the Chickens
I once purposely ate McDonald's (something I rarely do) during my only viewing of Super Size Me. So, naturally, I had to eat chicken nuggets during this movie. I know that's fowl, but I really did.
So rare for a sequel, especially one 23-years-late, to top its original. For absolute certain, this one was way better than 2000's Chicken Run and I'm glad I gave it a chance.
I haven't seen the original Chicken Run in many, many years. In fact, it may have been since it premiered over two decades ago, so I figured I'd revisit it before watching the sequel no one asked for. I was not impressed, but I still liked it. And it only took 11 minutes for me to fall more in love with this follow-up.
After the events of the original, Chicken Island is a peaceful refuge place where our leads, Ginger and Rocky, are raising their youngling. Like freedom-loving Ginger, her daughter seeks freedom from the island and "Fun-Land" where chickens get their own bucket looks appealing. Looks can be deceiving...
If you liked/loved Pixar's sequels, namely Toy Story 2-3 and Finding Dory, there's zero chance you won't equally love this adventure. It's hilarious, fun, creative and has a bit of heart. One thing it didn't have: a good Rocky this time.
One of the main leads of the original, Rocky, has never been the real focus of the story, but at least he was much more entertaining in the first chapter. Here, he probably should've been written out. Sure, he advanced the plot in several different ways, but, wow, I could not stand his dry chicken schtick. He literally dragged down the movie which I found to be otherwise enormously entertaining.
I digress. It's longer than the original, and much darker - again, think Toy Story 3. And it's highly recommended. You really don't need to see the original as they provide SOOO many flashbacks.
I mean, it has been 23 years after all. Most people can't remember 23 days ago.
***
Final Thoughts: I understand they had to update the voice actors and I think I like them more here. ALL except Rocky again. Honestly, it probably would've been much better had they hired Mel Gibson to reprise his role. No offense against Zachary Levi. You just don't have Mel's distinct voice. No one really does.
Dunkirk (2017)
Pretty Much Dun For
The thing about chaos...sometimes, it isn't fair.
As much as I love Christopher Nolan, I am NOT a war-movie fan. In fact, almost every "great" war movie I watch, I'll admit, much like this one, it was enormously well-made...and I never want to see it again.
I liked it and it was wildly suspenseful, but also enormously confusing. I mean, it's straightforward: Allied WWII soldiers are cornered on a beach and really need to escape back home. Like really bad. But this movie is just a series of events from multiple points of view and heroism. On the surface, it's not complicated, but it's the chaotic nature of so much happening all at once that's hard to follow.
I'm sure these gentlemen felt the same way out there.
Not sure how exactly how to feel about this experience, but glad I finally crossed it off my movie bucket list. And mercifully, it wasn't too long. I'm not sure how much more chaos I could take. War is hell and humans were dumb to create it.
***
Final Thoughts: Can't believe this movie is now 7-years-old. I somehow felt like this was a must-watch back when it premiered in 2017 with all the awards/praise it received. And back then, I did try and watch if not all the movies released, at least the most notable ones. I just don't gravitate to war movies so I kept putting this off. Never thought it would take me this long.
The Marvels (2023)
A Marvel This Got Made
Did you do your homework? No, seriously. Hundreds of hours of MCU viewing are required before starting this movie.
The very best thing I could say about The Marvels was...I didn't hate Carol Danvers this go-around. In fact, she was probably my favorite character of the movie and that's saying a lot as she was absolutely insufferable in her debut movie. So much so, Captain Marvel remains as my least favorite MCU movie of the 33 made so far.
I can't say much more positive about this mess. It wasn't the worst (okay, there's a backhanded compliment,) but a ton of this was just dumb. It felt like an entire season of some obscure MCU show on Disney+ that virtually no one would watch all packed into 105 minutes. OH! That's another actual compliment: it was mercifully under 2-hours.
The Marvels does an incredibly lousy job of introducing/reintroducing audiences to the world of Captain Marvel and her two sidekicks. The synopsis is all over the place, but suffice to say, one lame villain is seeking revenge and trying to wreak havoc on the universe and only these three heroes can stop her. Never mind we live in a universe of countless Avengers, but I digress.
Sorry, I refuse to do research/homework before watching a movie. If the writers can't explain plots/subplots to a potentially new audience, then it is poorly written. Virtually nothing is explained here and unless you've watched multiples of hours of backstories, you'll just have to accept these people over here are the innocents, these are the heroes, these are the villains, etc. No attachments needed, just accept what you're shown.
A lot of people praised the Ms. Marvel character and she was fine. She was literally a female Peter Parker, but I didn't mind her. Boring but also fine was the character of Monica Rambeu. Nick Fury fizzled out and literally no other character was worthy of mentioning.
I commented that a lot of this was dumb and one of those ideas was a singing race of people. WOW, that was a rough scene. Also, dumb: false threats like having to evacuate a ship for...reasons? Captain Marvel being Superman x 11 in her first movie being reduced to barely a superhero this time around - until the story needed her to be Superman x 11 again. And while it's not the story, the editing was dumb and made the movie even more confusing.
Again, I absolutely hated 2019's Captain Marvel, but honestly, I might rewatch that one over ever seeing this chaos again. At least there was a straightforward storyline that was more interesting, familiar and contained a far more compelling Nick Fury.
For all the times the DCEU was trying to catchup/mimic the MCU, at least DC is doing the right thing with rebooting after a string of failures. I truly wish the MCU would take 5 years off and come back with something new. Ever since Endgame, there's been 11 MCU movies. While some were okay, most have been awful. Only Spider-Man: No Way Home and Black Panther: Wakanda Forever have been great.
This is truly a skip. You're missing absolutely nothing by leapfrogging this one and heading right into Deadpool 3.
***
Final Thoughts: That all said, I originally vowed to never see this after hating the first Captain Marvel movie so much, but I'm not 100% upset that I did finally see it. As previously revealed, I actually didn't hate her character this time. She wasn't the completely unlikable or unapproachable arrogant B she was in the original this time around. She was, in fact, the complete opposite.
Severance (2022)
On Fire'd
Finally got around to this incredibly weird, quirky, often-hilarious, SCARY, unique, dark, wonderfully acted, nail-biter and absolutely wonderful gem of a show. So sorry it took me two years to finally appreciate this.
My only two drawbacks: it probably should've been one episode less to make it tighter and this probably would've worked best as a miniseries and with no additional seasons. But I am interested in seeing the follow-up season.
Everyone, in front of and behind the camera was perfect and I absolutely loved the world-building and mystery. You truly feel like you're living right along side these characters. I cannot recommend this show enough.
***
Final Thoughts: While my favorite character was Helly, a very, VERY close second was Dylan. He was the absolute comic relief of the show and by far the most adorable.
Jack Ryan (2018)
It's Just Jack
After completing the only two-to-date seasons of Reacher, I discovered another Jack: Dr. Ryan and his first TV show. Annnnnd, it was good. Great? Nah. But I still liked it.
Best I could say: kept me right at the edge of my seat...this was enormously suspenseful. Worst I could say: John Krasinski was rather dull. Don't get me wrong - I do really like this actor/director. But, of all the Jack Ryan actors, he's definitely my third choice.
Alec Baldwin will always be my Jack Ryan and The Hunt for Red October is the pinnacle of Clancy's adaptations. Harrison Ford wasn't great, but I still prefer him as a solid second. I did like both Patriot Games and Clear & Present Danger, with the latter more. Forget Ben Affleck and his awful Sum of All Fears. And Chris Pine was not bad and neither was his Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit.
I will continue with the series, as I did like it, but frankly, this reminded me of Kieffer Sutherland's 24 series and made me miss it tremendously. 24 was about 2.4x better than this show, so far anyways. If you liked this season, and never seen 24, now's the time to explore the Best Jack...Mr. "I don't have time for this!" Bauer himself.
***
Final Thoughts: The Jack Ryan Adaptations ranked:
1. The Hunt for Red October (1990)
2. Clear & Present Danger (1994)
3. Patriot Games (1992)
4. Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit (2014)
5. Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan (2018-2023)
6. The Sum of All Fears (2002)
Killers of the Flower Moon (2023)
Slasher of the Old West
I swear I believe more people died in this movie than in most Friday the 13ths. But, in defense of this film, it's three and a half hours long which is about 2+ Friday films.
I don't watch many trailers - I try my best to avoid them as they purposely spoil way too much. But, I did see this one. Many times. It was behind almost every movie I saw in theatres this year. And I will hand it to them. They truly, and finally, proved me wrong.
I thought I had this entire movie pegged. Much like Leonardo's other 3-hour epic, The Wolf of Wall Street. That movie was 100% predictable from the get-go. The entire movie was so A-B-C, it was actually boring for me. From these trailers, I thought the same thing. I could've have been more dead wrong.
And that's a good thing. Well, the bigger positive, anyways. At least I had no idea where this was headed. Too bad the story really didn't pick up until 2-2½ hours in.
"War hero/cook" Ernest moves to Oklahoma to live with his rich Uncle Hale and instantly falls for one of the Osage Nation Tribe. Unfortunately for his eventual new bride, and everyone else within arm's length, Uncle Hale didn't get rich by conventional means.
While I did like this and more so as it progressed, this was 100% a task to get through. I've seen other 3-hour movies, including ones with Leonardo DiCaprio and Robert De Niro that were far more interesting and faster paced - even at the same length. I simply cannot recommend this movie too much to anyone who is not serious about finding out what happened with these dozens of murders back in the 1920s.
Plus, I know it was a different time back in the 1920s vs 2020s, but it's so hard to grasp there was basically a murder a week in a smallish town and people kept going among their merry way. I'm absolutely no expert and I trust at least most of this is true, but dang, this was basically a war zone with deaths and no one fled for their own safety?
That all said, yes, of course this was well shot and definitely greatly acted. I did love the second half better than the first and glad to have been given more information (finally) towards the end. This is sure to be nominated for many awards and if it wins them all or grand majority, I wouldn't be surprised. It just wouldn't be on my lists for greats of 2023.
***
Final Thoughts: Once I realized this was three and a half hours, I vowed to wait until streaming as I knew I wouldn't want to spend that much time in the cinema. Now that I've seen it, I'm even more pleased I waited as it really wasn't as jammed packed as I thought it would be. This truly was a very slow-burn and I really don't have this much patience.
Triangle of Sadness (2022)
The Lost Menu
Truth in the title...is there any happiness to be had?
What a weird film. It's a pretty in-your-face film with little hidden secrets, but it's still an oddball. Almost reminded me of a Wes Anderson film except for less interesting dialogue and MUCH slower paced.
Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful 1% trip. An entire boatload of Thurston Howell the Thirds and his Lovey wife. If you can tolerate that plus the viewpoint of the tip-hungry elite staff, watch this.
Seriously, I'm not 100% sure all I saw. I mean, as I stated, the movie is obvious and blatant to the events that occur, but I'm sure there's a hidden meaning I'm just missing. I'll have to watch one of those "Ending Explained" YouTube videos now to catch what I missed, if anything at all.
Annnd, I'm back. I just watched THREE of those "Ending Explained" videos and, nope, I missed nothing. I do think other people have found more humor and enjoyment out of this than I did, but at least we all got it. It's not a bad film. Well-shot, acted, original and scored well.
Kinda reminded me a little of The Menu, but I loved that movie 10x more than this one. In fact, I actually watched The Menu three times in the week I discovered that and I don't think I'll ever want to see this Triangle of Sadness a second time.
***
Final Thoughts: Shocking to learn of what happened to one of the leads, Charlbi Dean. RIP and passed so early. She would've definitely had a long career ahead of her.