Reviews

First, this is just a B movie. Don't expect much from it. The video quality is poor, the editing is poor, the dialog is bad, the special effects are weak and the acting is less than impressive.

That being said, the premise is interesting. I don't know if this is based on a Lovecraft work, but it has some elements such as mysterious books and summoned tentacled monsters. I find that sort of thing interesting so I stayed with it.

I am a sucker for Harryhausen-like claymation monsters, so I enjoyed that part of it, I am pretty forgiving of poor special effects, so that part doesn't bother me.

Beyond that there is nothing here worth watching unless you are a fan of Herb Tarlek.

This movie currently holds a 7.3 rating. A majority of the votes are '10'. In no shape of the imagination should anyone give this movie a 10/10. My guess is that the only people rating it are the production crew and their families. Given the number of reviews that mention Zach Galligans acting ability and handsomeness my guess would be that Zach or his agent has written quite a few.

While the movie has some bright spots and some potential, it fails miserably on early promise and is just not good. In my mind a coherent story with believable dialog and strong editing will more than make up for cheap special effects. This movie had none of those.

The acting was generally poor. Apesanahquat and Billy Daydodge (sic) did good jobs. Their time on screen were the high points of the movie. I am going to give Zach the benefit of the doubt here and blame it on the script, directing and editing, but he certainly did not save the show. One of the reviews here says that he can teach his costars a thing or two about how to act. If that is true then I can only imagine how bad they were BEFORE he taught them anything. The rest of the cast did not seem like professional actors at all. Perhaps this was their first role.

The story has a decent premise. Hardly any of the subplots are fleshed out. The Barney Fyfe Deputy attempt at comic relief is poorly done. The ex-wife story is vague. All of it could have been done better.

The thing that really irritates me is the jarring transition from one illogical scene to another. It just seemed amateurish.

The monsters themselves are fine. If the movie had been otherwise coherent I might actually worry about the special effects.

In general, it is a poorly done B-Movie. It is mostly coherent but it doesn't maintain any tension and is not worth being your primary focus. Maybe have it on in the background during your Halloween party?

Fortunately I watched it for free on YouTube so I feel like I got my money's worth.

Good, slowly paced movie without any jump scares or explosions. Well acted, good set design, spooky (more like 'bleak') atmosphere- I really felt like I was in 1600s New England. The tension builds at a realistic pace. May be plodding for some. I was really worried it would become silly if Black Philip spoke, but it turned out OK. The witches were unsettling and I could really feel the family's anguish. Not sure I understand what happened with the twins.

Has the pace of Tarkovsky's 'Stalker'. Slow, plodding, and not much happens. Mostly Scarlett Johannsen staring blankly. Interesting premise about an alien who experiences human society. Why is she picking up men? What happens to them? Do we just assume they are consumed by the black water? Who is the motorcycle guy? He seems to clean up her mess and is looking out for her. Is he her pimp? I like the realistic dialog and the shots of the Scottish countryside - very dramatic. Not sure that it makes a lot of sense (or maybe I just don't understand it), but it succeeds on an 'art' level, so it's good.

I had hoped this film would have been more fun. It IS fun in a dreary British way, but not fun like Hitchhiker's Guide. The acting is fine, the sets are fine, the dialogue is weak, and the script is OK. Maybe it's the directing? It feels like it has all the weight of an episode of All My Children. Not a waste of 83 minutes, especially if you like Sci-Fi (Science Fiction!) and Chris O'Dowd.

It is good to see the Norse mythology come to life via Marvel comics. I still love the imagery of Asgard and Jotunheim and the other -heims and -gards. I really liked the look and feel of Heimdall, Loki, Thor, Odin and Frigga, even though I always imagined it as just a big wooden hall, not a high tech palace.

The acting is mostly fine. The action is relentless. I still don't understand what actually happened - some ancient enemies were defeated but they came back and wielded phenomenal cosmic power and had some awesome space ships and shot lasers at the Norse Gods who fired their lasers back. Why do they even have swords? Oh well.

It was fun. Just don't think too hard.

Here are some non-negative points of this movie:

1. Proficient use of colored smoke-filled lighting. Very reminiscent of early MTV.

2. Fabulously cheesy last second gesture by dying vampire.

3. I'm kind of glad to Chris makepeace made more than one movie. Although this one probably put an end to his career.

4. Great 80s fashion and hair.

5. Grace Jones wore some pretty cool body paint.

6. I liked Grace's vampire makeup. Not one of those 'sexy' vampires. Almost as good as Kinski in Nosferatu.

7. Can someone explain to me why anyone would leave 3 50 gallon drums of flammable liquid in the lair where you sleep? Was it for their kerosene heaters during the winter?

8. Nice use of wacky 80s Asian stereotype.

9. The performance by the'renfield' type club owner was pretty good.

Other than that it just stunk.

A charming little flick about high school filled with extreme vulgarity - a porkies/fast times update. I liked the way they avoided treating the kids as one-dimensional. That scene where they were building up the courage to go by liquor rang very true. The whole cop thing was pretty silly. Evans low-key approach was a perfect counter punch to Seth's frenetic insanity. And McLovin really stole the show. I remember when Porky's came out and had it's famous 'dick pulling' scene and how that was the height of vulgarity. This movie is in the same vein with its vag-tastic voyage humor. It is what it is and it does it well. Don't expect anything more.

I liked this movie and I wish I liked it more. It is ambitious, seems to want to say something important, visually stunning and has great performances from some very good actors. But I was left with a sense of a complicated idea just 'mostly' worked out. A lot of points that the director wanted to make, with some very good scenes used to make those points but just not tied together very well or very cohesively. I think it ran on about 25 minutes too long. Which is too bad. In general it seemed like a self-indulgent free-for-all and lacked the discipline to turn it into a real gem. Almost like a high school senior writing poetry that goes all over the place, but could benefit from a series of rewrites. I think a second (or third) draft would have made it really sweet.