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jengiscan2000
Reviews
She-Wolf of London (1990)
Ahh the memories
Well this takes me back.
I was a full time extra at the time and did a lot of work on this show.
Had a great time with lots of friends doing it.
It was however a very troubled production.
HTV were the British component and made some shows that were so bad they were never shown.
I was in them.
I think this was the last TV/film they were involved in, falling out with the US production company as a result.
I think the problem was it was neither one thing nor the other.
Teenagers would have loved it but would not be allowed to watch.
Having seen some of the episodes, i really enjoyed them.
It was ahead of it's time.
It was poorly paid work from top to bottom.
When the pay is poor stuff goes missing.
I pinched a 'BEYOND THE BEYOND' T shirt , still have , still wear it.
I am the big frog alien at the convention.
They also ruined a pair of my shoes, so I nicked a pair from wardrobe in Bristol, they were sharing with the BBC.
Nice pair of suede brogues, I still wear with a suit.
They came from the 'East Enders' wardrobe and have 'Phil Mitchell' in black marker on the inside.
Great times.
Waiting for the Barbarians (2019)
Are you kidding me, really?!
Looked good on paper.
Three well known 'good' actors , well filmed and so on but really?
I always want to like a film when I watch it.
It's bloody awful, Mark Rylance wimping about, always on the verge of tears.
Weird foot fetish.
Not an interesting man at all.
It's set in a non existent colonial outpost somewhere in 'Marocstanlia'
Pattinson is just picking up the cheque, very little presence.
Mr Depp allowed free reign to be 'quirky' (those glasses!)
Why will no director ever say "Don't do that Johnny, it's crap"
He is a good actor but seems to get away with nonsense on a regular basis.
Maybe he is too nice to say no to ?
Too long , a lot of shots of not much happening.
I understand it examines 'colonialism' but in my opinion it does not do it well.
Have not read the book and after this I won't be.
Make your own mind up.
Dawn of the Dragonslayer (2011)
What is less than 1? 0? that's still too much.......
My first review of this 'film' was deleted because someone complained about it! Having read it back again and finding nothing other than my scathing viewpoint of the film on show I can only think it was one of the reviewers who praised it so highly. Written by someone connected with the production maybe? So here with some editing is the review..........................
This is a stinker from beginning to end. An extremely badly written script.The two leads were good actors but the rest must have trained at the ham school of dramatic arts, one character, I couldn't understand a word he said throughout the entire film. Most reviewers have mentioned the scenery as if it was a master stroke of production design, you point a camera at hills, mountains and the sea, it usually looks amazing! What's Will doing now?.....Oh he is walking through the country side and now? Oh he is still walking and some more walking and finally he is upgraded to a horse and he is riding now, yes riding some more and a little bit more riding. This all takes place in a land with a population of 10 or maybe 12, 2 die early on.The villain I am sure I saw him in tights in a pantomime somewhere this Christmas...you know what I just can not be bothered to expend any more time and energy on this. I am going to go and play SKYRIM instead......Do not say I didn't warn you.
Sons of Anarchy (2008)
Complete nonsense
Well someone somewhere thought 'hey what if we put the Sopranos on bikes and gave them loads of tattoos' and the other Idiot in the room said 'great Idea, have some money!' I have to confess I have only watched the first episode but on the 'strength' of what I have seen I will not be watching any more. The Sopranos drew you in and after a few series I realised that they were all evil people with no redeeming features but I did watch all of them. Ten minutes in to this and you realise they are ALL vile, corrupt, hypocritical murderous psychopaths and that's just the women! I think you are supposed to empathise with the son but he brutally beats some guy to a pulp over something I have no doubt he would condone if the guy had been wearing his colours.The 'bad' guys seem to be distinguished only by the fact that they are even uglier than the SOA! Its just a series about a bunch of lowlife scum, why we need to see or 'explore'this incredibly seedy,sleazy and worthless aspect of modern life is beyond me.This series cheapens us all.I knew how this episode would end about half way through and it was so clichéd I burst out laughing.Pathetic.
Game of Thrones (2011)
Excellent swords and sorcery behemoth!
A friend recommended this series to me and I have to say I was not to keen but I have a 13 year old son and I thought we could watch it together. Having both played The Elder Scrolls series of computer games, Morrowind, Oblivion and the latest Skyrim ,dragons included, we were both struck as to how similar it was. However it is in every way a superior example of the genre brought to life on the screen. The acting is superb, costumes, sets and CGI all blend seamlessly into a visual feast for the eyes. I would recommend this to anyone who has even a passing interest in this sort of medieval fantasy world. All I can say is HBO better not do a DEADWOOD or ROME and just wander off to pastures new leaving the fans all wanting more.Just wait until those dragons reach adolescence!
Kill List (2011)
Emperors new clothes of a film....
Saw good reviews for this film and sat down hoping for a good cinematic experience. Ho hum another film about hit men,yawn,graphic violence,yawn. Not much of a plot really,yawn. Banal dialogue,yawn. One funny moment 'is that twenty minutes already?'not that I was looking for comedy. Pretentious dull nonsense but at least it didn't cost millions. Do yourself a favour and watch 'In Bruges' instead. I am supposed to write ten lines minimum for my review of this film but I have nothing more to say about it really. The other guys girlfriend is in the excellent TV comedy 'Phoneshop' that has just finished its second series and the Irish guy was wheels in the also excellent comedy series 'Spaced' with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost....
Santa Sangre (1989)
Woweeeeeeeee
Not a big fan of horror or El Topo or Holy mountain, to be honest I just found them tedious and pretentious,maybe I should watch them again? but this is just such a fantastic film. Its completely mad,bonkers,crazy,insane. So imaginative,so witty, so clever,so moving, a feast for the eyes and brain. I would have to rate it as one of my all time greats. I have nothing else to say but I have to have at least ten lines of text. Watch and be amazed. Watch and be amazed. Really watch it you will not be disappointed.I have nothing else to say but I have to have at least ten lines of text. Watch and be amazed. Watch and be amazed. Really watch it you will not be disappointed.
Brothers War (2009)
Oh how me and my 12 year old son laughed.....
Haahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa...If you watch this film everyone you have ever known and loved will die! Not really but just don't bother, pick your nose for 90 minutes or read a book on the toilet. Truly one of the worst films ever, I'm so glad it cost me nothing but time! A lot of the action takes place in woods, see if you can spot the actor. The whole thing takes place in an area the size of my back yard. Continuity....Er?....plot? yeah well, we were drunk at this party and it seemed like a good idea at the time. You will only slow us down....I'm coming with you!...there are wounded here we must help them.....Ill be back....this information could change the whole war...Hmm lets team up with a load of Nazis and fight the Russians! Every one was so clean,I recognised the evil commie as that really scary bloke from the original 'Hills have eyes' sh....Y'know what I could be terribly witty with more put downs and cynical comments but this is just not even worth that......poof.
The Headsman (2005)
Wtf
What are the other reviewers on? This film is a stinker from start to finish.Terrible script,awful soundtrack and a load of actors who all looked as if they would rather be somewhere else. It looked good, if gurning extras with dirtied up medieval teeth and slopping about in rags is how you picture the middle ages. Cliché after cliché,more plot holes than a Swiss cheese,It leaps through time faster than H.G Wells,one review said it was to make it shorter,they wanted to inflict more of this on us?,all this AND Steven Berkoff! Even he found the scenery not appetising enough to chew. I always watch films until the end, I wanted to turn this off after about ten minutes.Even my 12 year old son thought it bad and he has no discrimination whatsoever! Just say NO, go and wash some dishes or fill in a tax return!
Du levande (2007)
.........and then you die.
You the living? OK I think I am an intelligent, educated, liberal and really into films. I really like and have a great sense of humour. I was under the impression this was a bleakly painful comedy. They got paid for making this, petrol was used, electricity burnt, food was consumed, sets built........why? I blame the current state of the world on this film and all those people associated with it, I will even include us the viewing public. We are all to blame and deserve whatever coming. Its not funny, not much happens, everyone it seems is bored or boring. There are no conversations, communication is minimal. There is no plot as far as I am aware. I have in fact just lost 89 point something minutes of my life. I will never ever get that time back. The only message I have come away with is perhaps life is too short to sit around watching movies of people doing not much......and then you die!