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Reviews
Big Momma's House 2 (2006)
A comedy of -epic- proportions
Martin Lawrence returns as everybody's favorite heavyweight detective in Big Momma's House 2. After learning of his partner's murder, Malcolm Turner (Martin Lawrence) leaves behind his quiet civilian life to catch the killers. Acting outside the jurisdiction of the FBI, Malcolm is on the trail of the international drug cartel suspected of his partner's murder, all the while fighting his old colleagues who want to reign in his maverick, above-the-law behavior.
A rib-tickling, side-splitting tour-de-farce, Big Momma's House Two offers helping after helping of morbidly obese comedy. You'll laugh so hard you'll go into diabetic shock!
Garden State (2004)
Ignore the hype
Garden State is the smash-hit movie for every twit with thick, black-rimmed glasses. This movie was ugly and poorly executed. Indie geeks have the worst taste in everything, which they might have realized for a rare, blinking moment when the nerd-sweater market bottomed out back in the 90s.
But, here we are again. It must be fate.
Anyway, don't listen to any twit who tells you that this movie was "brilliant." I bet they'll tell you Lost in Translation was great, and that Wes Anderson is a genius. Just because a movie -tries- be be artistic, doesn't mean it should get merit for that attempt regardless of success.
You don't have to fit in with all your friends and impress your family by ranking this movie up there with the Golden Age of every cinema culture on earth. An 8.0? C'mon. Indie nerds, please, get over yourselves. You're old enough by now ... or are you well into your 30s and still brag about how it's "so cool" to hang out in the city?
The Cosby Mysteries (1994)
This show had limitless possibilities
Too bad they cancelled it so early. My favorite episode was when Detective Cosby had a lottery ticket and was sitting behind that bulletproof glass, and he was talking to the guy who wanted to kill him, and the guy who wanted to kill him thought he could shoot him, and then Det. Cos kept ragging him on, and then the guy tried to shoot him! but the glass was there. Then the cops came and nabbed him.
Another episode featured Detective Cosby eating some hoagies, but his wife told him not to because he had to watch hi s diet, so the Cos hid it underneath his sweatshirt and ate it in the bathroom. Excellent show!
Christmas with the Kranks (2004)
Forget the Polar Express...
... take your kids to see Christmas with the Kranks, the true classic of the holiday season! The film follows Luther Krank (played by everyone's favorite everyman Tim Allen) in his misadventures involving the holiday known as Christmas. Jamie Lee Curtis plays Nora Morgenstern-Krank, a successful lawyer who joins her husband in his boycott of Christmas.
Zaniness is abound in this high-flying rip-roaring send-up of the classic holiday farce. Dan Aykroyd is perfect in his role as Vic Frohmeyer, a sadistic midwestern Christian bent on imposing his red-state values of Community on the libertarian Krank family. Some 'frohmeyer' he is!
This film had all the laughs of The Santa Claus II, plus Dan Aykroyd.
7/10