This is as bad as movies can get. Camera-work and editing is, like other comments said, home video quality. Actors act like it's their first attempt in front of the camera. Script doesn't make sense. During dialogues, characters constantly say things that don't make sense in the context, things no one would ever say. I'm not sure which parts of this movie were supposed to be comedic. There is a little nudity but it's badly shot and lit that it doesn't look the least bit sexy. Characters are all irritating, inconsistent, and the movie abruptly ends without any of story lines being wrapped up (some just get forgotten along the way). Attempts to imitate other movies of the genre and likewise irritating. And are times that bad for O'Halloran and Feldman that they have to take roles in movies this bad? Don't watch this movie, even if you're an avid fan of teen sex comedies. There's nothing in it for you and you'll just be bored for an hour and a half.
Reviews
3 Reviews
Private Parts
(1972)
It's OK
18 May 2011
Warning: Spoilers
Unusual movie, not quite horror but also not quite black comedy either. As another reviewer said, it resembles Psycho or Peeping Tom with it's focus on psychology and even relentless presence of camera - but those themes aren't explored further, they're there just to add another touch of weirdness. On the other hand, film is also one part exploitation, with some nude scenes to oogle here and there. Psychology is the most interesting part: Cheryl is written well as a needy but neglected teenager who is creeped out by the neighbor photographer, but too flattered to resist - and what little glimpses of Aunt Martha and George we have, are interesting. Sadly, acting is below average, except for Lucille Benson who is quite good, leading actress Ayn Ruymen in particular speaks her lines as if she hears them for the first time (which adds to the exploitation feel). The ending is at the same time great and unsatisfying. The scene is cut away in the middle of final fight, and next ten minutes we are left wondering what happened next, while director taunts us with daylit scenes of two cops searching the premises - very effective way to present aftermath. On the other hand, a lot is left half-explained, and this film in particular doesn't benefit from that. The final appearance of Cheryl is a pretty cliché final twist, one that you see coming, but hope that director will have more imagination. It's an unusual and quirky film that many will find interesting, but don't expect a masterpiece.
Jake's Booty Call
(2003)
Excruciatingly boring crude flash animation.
6 February 2011
To call this a movie is quite a stretch. It's just a crude flash animation, the likes of which float around internet, thoughtlessly extended to something above an hour, and only a distributor as uncritical as National Lampoon would have given it time of it's day; still, having an actual distributor does not make it a movie.
Whatever it is, it's amazingly boring. The script consists of titular Jake coming on to women with lamest possible come-ons, then getting them to bed, then moving to a different location and repeating all that. Animation is crude and repetitive, mostly consisting of talking heads barely moving, not even bothering to try to give impression of life. So you can imagine - an hour of people talking is rarely interesting, specially if they're talking the same thing over and over, double-specially if these people are one jerk away from being still images. As for jokes, they are non-existent. There isn't even an attempt to make an actual joke in this movie - I guess they though Jake's endless blabbering would be funny in itself.
Sex scenes, which I suppose are the main selling point, are too crude to be any sexy, so even if you're renting the film for cartoon porn you'll be disappointed. There's some plot about some prince who has to get laid but can't get around it, but this excuse of a plot didn't interest creators of "Jake" any more than it will interest you, they barely stick around it long enough for us to realize that it's moronic even by sex comedy standards. Worst of all, Jake is an insufferable little bitch of a character, not only is he arrogant and obnoxious, his clown-like approach to women embellished with high-pitched squeaks is very unlikely to score him any action, even if he plays "by averages". You will be instantly annoyed by him, which will probably make you turn the film off long before you get bored.
"Jake's booty call" originated as a crude, soft-core porn flash game and it was very popular. Yet there was no reason to make it a feature film. Jake is not a character we'd want to watch for an hour; with less emphasis on sex and no game-play, "movie" lacks two only things that made games popular; the whole affair looks incredibly cheap and dated, comparable to a sub-par Flash animation that you can dig up anywhere on internet, with style that may have looked cool-ish in early days on Macromedia, but nowadays looks just cheap; and finally, a formula that worked in 5 min format doesn't necessarily work for an hour, as is the case here. Fans of the original game won't like it. In fact, they'll very likely be just as bored as I was. Fans of macho sex comedies will hate it because of it's overall lack of jokes and decent sex scenes. Fans of bad movies will hate it as well, as this is not one of those so-good-it's-bad affairs.
Whatever it is, it's amazingly boring. The script consists of titular Jake coming on to women with lamest possible come-ons, then getting them to bed, then moving to a different location and repeating all that. Animation is crude and repetitive, mostly consisting of talking heads barely moving, not even bothering to try to give impression of life. So you can imagine - an hour of people talking is rarely interesting, specially if they're talking the same thing over and over, double-specially if these people are one jerk away from being still images. As for jokes, they are non-existent. There isn't even an attempt to make an actual joke in this movie - I guess they though Jake's endless blabbering would be funny in itself.
Sex scenes, which I suppose are the main selling point, are too crude to be any sexy, so even if you're renting the film for cartoon porn you'll be disappointed. There's some plot about some prince who has to get laid but can't get around it, but this excuse of a plot didn't interest creators of "Jake" any more than it will interest you, they barely stick around it long enough for us to realize that it's moronic even by sex comedy standards. Worst of all, Jake is an insufferable little bitch of a character, not only is he arrogant and obnoxious, his clown-like approach to women embellished with high-pitched squeaks is very unlikely to score him any action, even if he plays "by averages". You will be instantly annoyed by him, which will probably make you turn the film off long before you get bored.
"Jake's booty call" originated as a crude, soft-core porn flash game and it was very popular. Yet there was no reason to make it a feature film. Jake is not a character we'd want to watch for an hour; with less emphasis on sex and no game-play, "movie" lacks two only things that made games popular; the whole affair looks incredibly cheap and dated, comparable to a sub-par Flash animation that you can dig up anywhere on internet, with style that may have looked cool-ish in early days on Macromedia, but nowadays looks just cheap; and finally, a formula that worked in 5 min format doesn't necessarily work for an hour, as is the case here. Fans of the original game won't like it. In fact, they'll very likely be just as bored as I was. Fans of macho sex comedies will hate it because of it's overall lack of jokes and decent sex scenes. Fans of bad movies will hate it as well, as this is not one of those so-good-it's-bad affairs.
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