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An error has ocurred. Please try again4 Years on Edit: Just been reading the descriptions for the films and how awful and cringe-inducing the comments I made were. Some really bad jokes as well. So I apologise for this and have deleted the worst of them. I will still continue to edit the list.
Please note Raid into Tibet (1966, Adriann Cowell) is not on IMDB.
Reviews
Fuefukigawa (1960)
Breathtaking
I have seen many Japanese films over the years and this film is one of the most breathtaking. During the film's 2 hours you are taken through generations of one family, with the film echoing the message that war leads to inevitable tragedy. The film is equally about Buddhism in the 1500s with re-incarnation, ghosts, rituals and temples being prominent to the story. In the background of the story is a grand wooden bridge that is a reminder of the dangerous world that lies across the water.
I'm a fan of the coloured on black and white visuals. It's odd but adds a strange feel to the film that matches the ancient Japan world. The battle scenes are brief but stunning. I don't think any were reused as 'WILLIAM FLANIGAN, PhD' stated in his review. That's got to be one of the worst reviews I have read. He gives points based on subtitles and restoration (which is dependent on the screening, so is useless to the reader), and not on acting, story and plot. He seems to care very little about the style and the substance of a film rather the technical aspects. Anyone who makes dodgy reviews while always signing his name in capitals with 'PhD' next to it, is a bit sad.
Best F(r)iends: Volume 1 (2017)
An Unusual Masterpiece
This film is nuts. It starts off slowly. Jon (played by Greg "O hai Mark" Sestero) is a drifter who stumbles upon Harvey (Tommy "I'm fed up with this wurld" Wiseau). Harvey gives him a job for a day. The next day Jon comes back to Harvey for a full-time job. Little does Harvey know that Jon is going to betray him by selling bags of Harvey's gold teeth. What a story Mark (I mean Jon).
I saw the UK premiere of the extended cut and the audience was going crazy. There were a few references to The Room and whenever they happened the audience applauded with frenzy. It's not The Room, and I'm not going to compare them as others will do this. I will say that if you want an entirely unique viewing experience which will make you laugh at the poor/legendary acting and scratch your head with bewilderment, this is the film.
Best Friends is very good, and it is very bad, so it's impossible to give it a legitimate score with the usual ranking system. As stupid as this sounds, it's true, so I'll be interested how critics approach Best Friends on it's release.
The 9/10 is for the experience I had while watching it. It really is awesome to see Tommy and Greg acting again opposite each other, so this should not be missed.
Nativity 2: Danger in the Manger! (2012)
These films are awful. Run for the hills!
Rumour has it that Guantanamo Bay use these Nativity films for torture. I see why. Its just inhumane. Please do not subject your kids to this mental torture as they could easily maintain brain damage for life.
What Debbie Isitt and her amateur film crew do is they obtain the worst singing/atonal kids to sing about Christmas and happiness, and snow and Santa and Lucifer Son of Satan and family togetherness and Jesus. There's also a bit where they kidnap a baby and 14 kids or something like that. Seeing as how annoying the kids where, I was hoping I was watching the news.
The good thing is that I never want kids now. This may save me misery in the future. This could be a more humane way of treating the China 1 child policy, just show every citizen this dirge and no- one will reproduce.
In comparison, Paul Blart: Mall Cop is our lord and saviour. Nativity 2 is so bad I am genuinely thinking of starting a mini-cult worshipping Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Anyone want to join?
Nice to see a 5 star performance by David Tennant's stunt double.
I mean, when North Korea show off kid's talents on television they have them play tunes on the guitar. And you know what? They do it properly unlike our irritating, stuck-up, snotty-nosed, little brats. I think we, as a country, need to seriously think about our future. These kids will run the country one day... and that is something (like climate change and the oil crisis) we should really ponder and is a serious imminent threat.
Bokusâ (1977)
Better Than Rocky
I am probably the only person to think this, but I would rather watch this unseen boxing film than the universally appraised Rocky. Rocky was released a year prior, and there are countless similarities. Terayama improves on the source film ten-fold, and turns the story into a gripping, tense and enjoyable sports movie.
The story concerns a boxer which has just been told he should give up the profession. The day before, he accidentally kills a man at at a construction site. He approaches the brother of the victim, who was a boxing master years ago, to train him to become the next boxing champion.
I found the training montages (what everyone loves about Rocky), to be the best part of the film. By using the industrial landscape, desolate train tracks, open roads and concrete bridges, Terayama turns a polluted deteriorating city into something stylised and memorable. The story is incredibly predictable, limiting his typical insane aesthetic, although all of his other auteur techniiques are there. Mainly awesome music, an alternating colour palette, train tracks, and a Fellini influence. No clocks though...
For me, it's his third best film (Pastoral being first, Throw Away Your Books being second and Farewell to the Ark being fourth), but not to be missed at all.
Black Moon (1975)
Its Like Being Punched in the Face by a Goose
this...film...was...weird. I was working my way down a "weirdest films" list when I got to this one. After seeing the trailer (the one where the badger gets run over by a car), I decided to watch. was this a good idea... I don't even know. What on earth did I watch? It's like a surrealist Bunuel movie, but more empty, with bad acting and literally nothing making sense. After watching this, I found out it was a Malle film, which I was very surprised at. Here is a conversation I found with Billy Wilder and Louis Malle: "Allegedly, the story goes like this. Billy Wilder runs into Louis Malle, this is in the late 50′s, early 60′s. And Louis Malle had just made his most expensive film, which has cost 2 1/2 million dollars. And Billy Wilder asks him what the film is about. And Louis Malle says "Well, it's sort of a dream within a dream." And Billy Wilder says "You just lost 2 1/2 million dollars" Apparently there are deep meanings to the images shown on film, but all I see is a random mess.