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Mr. Woodcock (2007)
3/10
Corny Child Abuse Comedy
8 October 2007
Warning: Spoilers
i rather enjoyed this movie, but thinking about it afterwards i thought it was a rather disjointed and hollow movie.

woodcock is a teacher, whose teaching style borders on child abuse you see him picking on the small kids, the fat kids and other less than athletic kids.

which is fine by me, child abuse is a good subject for a serious movie. bullshit author and victim returns home and learns things about him self and makes teacher see the error of his ways sounds like a good serious movie.

turn the child abuse into 'tough but fair teaching' and throw in a few gross out larf scenes and it would have made a good revenge comedy.

BUT this movie tries to be both a comedy AND a serious movie, and fails in both guises it fails to be a comedy because the subject is way to serious, and it fails to be a serious movie because woodcock is exonerated at the end of the movie.
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10/10
View of a Shakespeare Virgin Spoiler Alert
3 December 2004
Warning: Spoilers
having never actually seen anything by this beloved of the luvvies, let alone a production of merchant of venice, i cant comment on how faithful it is to previous adaptations of the play so i will treat it as just another movie that tries to be more than novocaine for the eye MoV is an instantly gripping movie about a young lover bassanio (fiennes) and his merchant friend antonio (irons) and a Jewish money lender shylock (pacino)

plot summary

bassiano is broke and needs money to woo the lovely portia (collins), he goes to his friend antonio, who sypathises with his friends predicament, so borrows some money off shylock

now antonio does not like jews in general and shylock in particular and shylock bitter and twisted from the abuse he has suffered from antonio in particular and christians in general agrees to lend antonio the money on condition that if antonio does not repay the loan by the agreed deadline, shylock will cut a pound of flesh from antonios body

comment

the movie is breathtakingly beautiful and acted and spoken in such a way as to force you to think about what each line means, this in turn causes the viewer to gain insights into the characters and their motivations

it seems to me to be a movie about the choices that shylock makes, and how making wrong choices leads to shylocks ruin

from the moment shylock demands his pound of flesh he is doomed, for rest of the world is against him and connives to bring about his downfall

this disturbed me greatly, normally in a movie when a victim gets a chance of revenge against those who have harmed him either the victim succeeds or makes the villain see the error of his ways leading to a big hug

not in MoV the victim quickly becomes seen as the villain and is stripped of his fortune and faith

this movie is a powerful and subtle portrayal of casual anti semitism which shows how a whole society can turn on a minority and make it seem like the victim is really the offender

i was blown away by this movie 10/10
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A Way of Life (2004)
7/10
Harshest & Bleakest Film I Have Seen Since Warzone
12 November 2004
Warning: Spoilers
leigh-anne is a single mother, on benefit, living in dark, damp house, with sick baby

from this cheerful start the film spirals down to its tragic ending

well thats the review over with, now for some comments

+++SPOILERS+++

movies that portray people from the arse end of society are not uncommon, what distinguishes a way of life from the plethora of sentimental portrayals of plucky and lovable characters, is that the main characters in a way of life are completely lacking in redeeming features and the film itself is about as unsentimental as it is possible to get

the central character, leigh-anne, is portrayed as an twisted evil bitch, who is surrounded by friends who are not really her friends

this is an example of how bad leigh-anne is:

a middle aged man comes up to her in a pub, obviously wanting to purchase her sexual services, to which she responds: "ain't you gonna buy me a drink first"

she starts a conversation with a girl a pub, who tells her: "me mam wont let me have a boyfriend till I'm 15"

leigh-anne responds with fake astonishment: "well thats ages away, pity you could have any boy in this place"

so she takes the girl out of the pub, and is followed by the middle aged man, who asks her how much? she says £30, he says he can get it for half that elsewhere, to which she says: "yeah but she ain't been had before"

she takes his money and says to the girl: "just open your legs and let him do the rest"

we see a parting shot of rough sex and the girl in pain
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4/10
Blame It On The Scriptwriter
2 August 2004
this movie is a remake of the 1975 classic about a small community where men recreate their uppity women as robots. I have not seen it since i was a child so the political satire element of the movie went right over my head and saw it as a straight sc-fi thriller.

the remake is a confused comedy, that sometimes tips its hat towards sci-fi thriller

the movie begins very well, kidman plays the head of a TV network, who appears hyperactivly enthusiastic about the dross TV shows she pumps out into the ether. one of the victims of her shows goes on a killing spree and kidman is sacked, has a nervous breakdown and she, her husband and two kids leave new york to start a new life in the burbs

the movie then ambles its way through funny scenes to its climax

the one major flaw of the movie is the nature of wives in question, in the original the women were robot versions of murdered women, in this version the women have nano chips implanted into their brain that overide their free will and forces them to behave according to the values of stepford

however several scenes in the movie clearly state that the 'women' are in fact robots, for example the bette midler character puts her hand on a gas flame and she feels no pain nor is her hand damaged

this major flaw prevents this movie from being anything but a cheap mockery of the original, but it is quite funny

5/10
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Down to You (2000)
7/10
Strangely Endearing
1 August 2004
to quote the previous commenter,

"Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy and girl break-up. Boy and girl miss each other and get back together. The end."

its all true, BUT there is a lot more to this movie than that trite plot summary

a good movie starts with characters you care about, you don't want them to get hurt and you want them to be happy. This movie manages this, prinze and stiles manage to rise about the dross of pretty people and portray their characters with a deal of sympathy

another strength of the movie is the direction. some people dislike strange cuts, talking to camera and a lot of tricksey and humorous continuity. this movie has all of these in buckets

in short this movie is not great art, but it is an agreeable 90 mins of bittersweet escapism
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10/10
Dickie Roberts is Nucking Futs
3 March 2004
DRFCS starts out as an average oddball grossout comedy / satire on holy-Wood and this lulls the viewer into a false sense of ennui

the movie starts proper when DR gets the chance of his adult life when he gets a meeting with rob reiner who says he is perfect for the lead role in his forthcoming movie, but he doesn't think DR can act like a normal guy because DR had a very abnormal childhood (read borderline abuse from an over ambitious mother)

so DR decides to prepare for the role by living with a normal family, who will treat him as a child, thus giving him the ability to act like a normal guy

the family are very sceptical about DR, but the father (Craig Bierko) insisted on the arrangement going ahead because DR is paying him very well

there follows a hilarious and touching (or sentimental you cynical people) farce that never becomes vulgar

the real stars of this movie are the family DR stays with, mother (Mary McCormack), sally (Jenna Boyd (who is also excellent in the missing)), sam (Scott Terra), Craig Bierko excels as the reluctant father and of course david spade portrays a character that starts out as an 'angry weirdo'

dont believe the bad reviews this movie has recieved, it is the best movie i have seen since return of the king, it is warm and funny and you find yourself caring about the characters

in the voting bit of the process i gave it a 10 (to try and boost the average score) but if i am being honest i will give it a 8, with marks deducted for the movie being a little shallow and unambitious

lastly i have got to respect a movie where most of the audience sits through the closing credits because of the really good song by actual former child stars
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