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1/10
Oh dear
3 February 2005
Warning: Spoilers
Listening to the director's commentary confirmed what I had suspected whilst watching the film: this is a movie made by a guy who wants to play at making a movie. The plot is the kind of thing that deluded teenagers churn out when they're going through that "I could write a book/screenplay/award winning sitcom" phase. There's a germ of an interesting idea buried in there (probably because its a sequel to some-one else's movie), but it is totally buried under an underwritten, badly executed and laughably un-thought-out script.

The lines are dire, and the performances are un-engaging, though again, I'm inclined to blame the director. He does not appear to have consulted the actors at all about what is required, rather plonked the script in their hands, pointed the camera at them and told them to get on with it. Who knows, with a little coaching, these actors could have acquitted themselves better (say what you like about musicians in movies, Jon Bon Jovi was excellent in Row Your Boat and more than acceptable in The Leading Man).

As it stands, the cast have no chemistry whatsoever. A beautiful opportunity to use the classic sex and vampirism parallel is passed up when, in order to infect Bon Jovi's character with vampire blood from his ailing co-hunter, he is given a transfusion. She should have bitten him. Mind you, they should have looked vaguely interested in each other throughout the rest of the film too. The only real moment of sexual tension, between the two female leads, is by the directors own admittance accidental. He had originally intended to use this silent sequence as an excuse for more pointless plot exposition - so, I suppose the finished product could have conceivably been worse. But not a lot.

Frankly, as movies go, this is badly plotted, silly and forgettable. Even as trashy movies go it's not sexy enough or gory enough to be entertaining. It could have been a fun and bloody little romp, but the director has left with more of a comedy, for all the wrong reasons.
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Row Your Boat (1999)
8/10
An overlooked gem
2 December 2004
This film was a real find. A truly engaging story and characters you can care about make this a far more rewarding viewing experience than many higher profile, bigger budget films.

Set in New York and dealing with an ex-con's struggle to go straight, this is a sweet, intelligent and moving film. Its central motif is the tragedy of the predicament that Jamey Meadows finds himself in - thoughtful and compassionate, his attempts to re-build his life are pushed down at every stage by his circumstances. The issues of the poverty cycle and the corruption of the vulnerable by the very people who should be protecting them are handled with care and insight, but without the cloying sentimentality so common in modern American cinema. Superbly written, though sadly poorly edited, this is a beautiful look at the struggle between idealism and practicality in today's world. This may sound heavy, but the script is peppered with humor and delivered with a lightness of touch that renders this a thoroughly enjoyable movie.

The cast are commendable, both as individuals and as an ensemble, and the responsiveness of their performances in their interactions with each other lift this movie above the ordinary. Bai Ling's performance is a perfect balance of vulnerability and spiritedness, full of childlike innocence and wonder yet at the same time worn down by the seeming inevitability of life's disappointments. The biggest surprise however is Jon Bon Jovi as Jamey Meadows. Some of his other performances have been stilted and unresponsive, and even his well executed turn in The Leading Man falls short of being truly impressive due to his character's marked similarity to his own public face. In Row Your Boat, on the other hand, Jon Bon Jovi shines. A man of commanding presence and charm when fronting his rock band, Bon Jovi is utterly believable here as a slightly awkward down and out dominated by his older brother. His responsive and committed interactions with the other cast members are what set this performance apart from his others, and credit must be given to the director for drawing out such an impressive performance where other directors have failed.

In all, a gem of a movie which has sadly been overlooked. Its limited release is a real shame.
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