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xtop3000
Reviews
Engine Trouble (2002)
Great cover art, unspeakably bad movie
The cover art for 'Junior' is everything enticing about the slasher genre these days: what will this particular slasher look like? The look is everything; the gimmick that completes the vision driving the illogical hack and slash of teenage fodder. 'Junior' seems to have spent everything in pursuit of a great looking outfit, equal parts Road Warrior and Leia's bounty hunter outfit in Revenge of the Jedi. The plot reads like tissue paper and, if you too happen to make the mistake of putting this movie on your television, you'll see that that's really a generous criticism. When the first shot comes up, scored by the kind of music usually found in Puppet Master movies, you know you're in trouble. When the first scene has ostensibly nothing to do with the actual film, you'll be hoping it's a film within a film or a dream. Sadly, this film wanders around, thinks gibbering psychos pounding on cars on a sunny 2 in the afternoon constitutes horror and is shot on the same stock as a 1980's porno. I couldn't even live with myself 45 minutes into the movie, the first time you see Junior and he cartwheels off the top of a car. I had to turn it off. Sometimes it's better to leave the video store with nothing at all.