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Afro Samurai (2007)
8/10
more to it than you think.
22 June 2007
alright, so i've real a lot of negative reviews of this show on here. Well kids, i'm going to defend this show, because there's a lot too it you guys are missing out on.

Afro Samurai is the new anime produced by and starring Mr. Samuel L. Jackson, as well as high end voice talent like Phil LaMarr of Samurai Jack fame, and Ron Perlman, the man who is and will always be Hellboy.

Like the great works of Shinichiro Watanabe, this work employs heavily the influence of western culture, specifically black western culture, which i suppose makes sense considering our stoic protagonist. now when i say black western culture, i'm not just talking about hip-hop music, i'm talking about Blaxploitation as well.

for those of you who don't know, Blaxploitation was a sub-genre of the 70's Exploitation films that dominated the drive-in scene during that period of American cinema history. the most famous and accessible Blaxploitation films these days are probably the Dolemite series of films, the Shaft series, or the classic Sweet Sweetback's Badass Song. these films were, for the most part terrible, but they influenced a generation of post-civil rights urban youth struggling to find an identity into action. they were stylish, fun, and gave an overall message of standing up for yourself and being proud of who you are, despite their inherent sexism, these films were the Noir flicks of their day, gritty and edgy and bleeding style. theaters in the 70's that would carry Exploitation and Blaxploitation films also carried many Kung Fu and Samurai films, so when 70's funk culture evolved into hip hop culture, it wasn't so shocking that the children who idolized Sweet Sweetback, also pulled influence from Yojimbo and Zoatichi, in fact, one of those children of influence even did the score for Afro Samurai - The RZA of The Wu Tang Clan, a seminal rap group that not only incorporated samurai and kung fu films into their lyrics, but into the music itself as well.

Okay, History lesson over, the reason i wanted to make you read all that is so that you have a better idea of where Afro Samurai is coming from, it is, for all intents and purposes, the coming together of cultures that are not, and have never been so far apart as you may think. a lot of people are also calling Afro-Samurai a child of the spaghetti western genre, which i suppose is true, but it must also be understood that the spaghetti western was heavily influenced by samurai films before them. Sergio Leone probably wouldn't even have a career if it wasn't for Akira Kurosowa's films.

Now, onto the show itself. Afro Samurai is incredibly simple, but i say that in the most endearing way possible. being convoluted is not a prerequisite of having substance or being artistic. Samurai Jack, a long running and long praised show has proved this time and again. great stories like the Hellboy series of comics or the popular Battlestar Galactica show, are great because they manage to turn schlocky cheese into high art, by giving it a modern overhaul. Afro Samurai takes it one step further, to the point where the schlock IS the art. Anime is very much like our version of the Exploitation genre of yesteryear, it's very underground, but still holds popularity and knowledge in the mainstream, it's filled with shitty crap, but the good stuff is worth watching, and it has it's own very unique style that has influenced generations of artists who've been exposed to it.

the story of Afro Samurai is very very basic, it's a revenge story because it needn't be anything more than a revenge story. it's intent isn't to change your life or make you weep for it's tragic hero, it's intent is to make your eyes melt and your heart pump, and maybe throw in a laugh or two. there's a saying: You Don't watch Kill Bill the same way you watch Shindler's List. that applies.

shows like Afro Samurai and the vampire miniseries Hellsing are fantastic shows because they take from the well of culture not everybody likes to admit is there, and shows you something that takes it one step further, shows you what those film makers of yesteryear could have done with the technology at our disposal today. they work on a storytelling level because the stories are simple and have been told many times. they are human stories.

the idea of Afro Samurai, i can say with some confidence, was never to get you thinking about our society like Ghost in the Shell or Neon Genesis, it's not that horse. Afro Samurai is meant to appeal to something deeper than your ego or your intellect, it appeals to your instinct. that's why it's so stylish. it's pleasure is purely aesthetic, and that is not at all a bad thing. Anime has a long history of taking from western culture and vice-versa, i like to think of Afro Samurai less as a corny bloodbath, and more a celebration of the corny bloodbaths we all know and love. western stories like Fist Full o' Dollars, The Good The Bad and The Ugly, and eastern stories like Ninja Scroll and Yojimbo. the standard for art these days is too narrow and too pretentious considering our history. i love Afro Samurai because it's not trying to deny all the things we hate to love, blood, gore, revenge, and i'm not saying that to be nihilistic or cynical. i'm saying that because it's true, it's just easier to justify revenge and blood and gore when we can come up with some over-convoluted plot to fit it into. well screw that.

Enjoy.
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8/10
Yo, Hoish.
27 May 2007
this summer is a big one for movies, Spider-man, Transformers, Shrek, Die Hard, Rush Hour, Bourne, the number of surefire blockbusters is through the roof, and what summer movie buffet is complete without Pirates of the Caribbean. the franchise means so much to so many, for the guys, a swashbuckling adventure with no shortage of amazing special effects, action sequences and babes with swords. for the ladies, Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom cavorting about in puffy shirts and saving damsels from sea monsters.

here we come to Pirates of The Caribbean - At World's End, the third and hopefully last installment of the Hollywood franchise that's proved that good acting, great writing, and convoluted storytelling are not the antithesis of Hollywood glory or box office success.

when we last left off, Jack Sparrow and his ship The Black Pearl had been taken by the Kraken, The East India Trading Company had in it's possession the heart of tragic villain Davey Jones, granting them control over the monstrous captain and his ghost ship The Flying Dutchman. so here we come to today, Will and Ellisebeth's relationship is on the rocks, Barbosa is back from the dead, the east India trading company is cracking down on piracy and that doesn't bode well for Barbosa and the gang's plans to retrieve Jack from Davey Jone's Locker.

okay, there's the only plot i'm going to give you, because frankly, the plot of this movie is way too convoluted and ever-changing.

let me say right off the bat that Pirates 3 is a fantastic movie. first off, Geoffry Rush returns in triumph and glory as the flamboyant and wonderful Captain Barbosa, and wastes no time in making us realize what was missing from Dead Man's Chest. Johnny Depp is back in full form, Orlando Bloom is still obnoxious and lame but we forgive it, and Keira Knightly is still one sexy babe. the first act of the film is confusing and a little existential for a Disney movie, but serves for some funny moments and manages without much stumbling to pick up where the last film left off, the second act is the film's biggest problem, it's confusing, it's overconvoluted, and it's flabby. this movie's long running time wouldn't be a problem if they hadnt insisted on flushing out every backstory of every character and making sure that everybody was fit to doublecross everybody. and so we find the third act, this is what we all came to see, some bigtime swashbuckling. the naval battles are incredible, the sword fighting is intense, and there's no lack of Johnny Depp's quips or Geoffry Rush's insane character acting.

bottom line, if you liked the first two, you're in for a treat, this has been one of the most consistent franchises since Star Wars, and it's mass appeal but refusal to placate to any specific demographic has garnered it respect as well as success. i love these movies, and can only hope future generations will as well. no film is without flaw, but in an era of Metachlorians and Rambo 4's, we take what we can get. i couldn't recommend this film more, not because it's the greatest film you'll see this year, because it isn't, but because so rarely do i have such a wonderful time at the movies, that i couldn't have at home.

go see it.
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Samurai Jack (2001–2017)
10/10
Long Ago In A Distant Land...
21 February 2007
Samurai Jack is the quintessence of cartoon storytelling today. there is no two-ways about it.

let me break it down for you: Long ago in a distant land, Aku, the shape-shifting master of darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil, but a samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped fourth to oppose him. before the final blow was struck, Aku opened a portal in time, flinging the samurai into the future, where Aku's evil is law. now the samurai seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is Aku.

the first story involves the samurai landing in the future, he is given a name by some enthusiastic street-urchins (Jack), and finds himself in a rough bar filled with belligerent aliens and talking dogs. these dogs are in desperate peril, and seek jack's help in a very obvious reference to Akira Kurosowa's masterpiece The Seven Samurai.

as the series continues, Jack's quest becomes less a focal point of the story, and more a vehicle for various short stories. great storytelling needs but three things: a setting, a protagonist, and a goal. Jack uses this idea to exploit a formula of diversity. anything the animator/writers throw on the wall, generally sticks. the ambiguity of the show allows for a free-form format that has made shows like Cowboy Bebop and Justice League Unlimited fellow masterpieces of the serial animation format. stories range from horror, science fiction and fantasy, to comedy, Wu shu, drama, noir, giant robo and epic action.

Jack is a child of a lot of inspiration, things like Star Wars and Akira Kurosowa are obvious influences, but the works of Marvel and DC comics, as well as the work of graphic novelist Frank Miller are all very apparent references. (infact Miller's acclaimed graphic novel Ronin is very similar in plot to Samurai Jack, and there is an entire episode based upon the premise of 300, another Miller book which has also become a Hollywood film.)

Jack is, by all means, an action show. in a given show there is maybe 10-15 minutes of action in a 24 minute episode, however in later seasons, the formula of Jack as an action show recedes heavily, and the show becomes more of a sampler-plate of creativeness. the stories are as charming and moving as they are diverse and epic.

Samurai Jack is a brilliant show, it's influences are long-spread and it will undoubtedly be remembered as a staple of artistic television.
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2/10
The Ultimate Waste of Time.
8 October 2006
Alrighty, so this film has gotten a bunch of good reviews and i'd like to firmly post myself as one of it's naysayers. the fact is, this movie appeals mostly to fans of current Avenger comic books, namely, Mark Millar and Bryan Hitches absolutely incredible The Ultimates.

now in the midsts of it's "sequal" The Ultimates is one of the most cinematic comic books you're likely to ever come across, if you did what they did to Sin City with The Ultimates, you'd have a smart, cool, funny, deep, politically charged action film unlike anything by the likes of Micheal Baye or Tony Scott.

the idea of The Ultimates is rather simple: the story of a government recruited super-hero team, set in the real world. so when we refer to "mister president" we are indeed referring to George Walker Bush. and so fourth and so on, taking the idea of marvel (comics set in real settings) one step further.

so considering all this, i was actually somewhat exited to see The Ultimate Avengers film, but man. was i disappointed. the film is corny, draggy, poorly animated, all the characters are just bleak, flat versions of themselves in the book. everything that makes the ultimates special has been replaced by awful one-liners. the most interesting characters have been reduced to one-trick ponies who get tiresome within the first three seconds.

Thor went from a radical left winger/Asgardian god who may just be a crazy nurse with delusions of grandeur and a super-weapon, to this flaky beardless moron with a hammer that can somehow be picked up by the hulk.

Giant Man went from a genius scientist with a superiority complex and a pension for beating his wife, to an archetypal "team leader." and so on, and so on.

all the depth has been sucked from these great characters. Mark Millar's distinctive and imaginative world has been replaced by marshmallows and Hulk fights that are placed in harmless warehouses where no innocent bystanders can get hurt. (in the book, this fight took place in Manhattan, and the death-toll was in the 300's and a lot of the story afterward has to do with Bruce Banner's guilt.) some of you reading this might just think i'm nitpicking, i'm being a comic book geek and i need to lighten up and let the movie be the movie and the comic be the comic, but y'know something? if they had just changed the plot, and kept to the core of the stories allure, i might have let it slide, but all they did is repackage The Ultimates to be none-threatening and unimportant, and it's not that. it's far from that.

2/10
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Samurai Champloo (2004–2005)
9/10
The Bomb
27 June 2006
since hip-hop's beginnings, there has always been a deep respect within the rap community for Asian culture, specifically that of the samurai, this is evident in the music of The Wu Tang Clan, shows like Kung Faux, and films like Ghost Dog.

now the table is turned with Shinichiro Watanabe's new venture, Samurai Champloo, this is a fine example of the mutual embrace of cultures between American hip-hop and Japanese samurai fiction.

the plot is pretty basic and remarkably none-convoluted for an anime: a tea-shop worker named Fuu falls into the company of two warriors, a samurai named Jin, and a slacker named Mugen, they go on a journey to find someone known as "the samurai who smells of sunflowers." pretty standard fair, right? well not always true, for instance, these three are not necessarily friends, in fact Mugen and Jin are both determined to kill each other at some point. for samurai fiction, there's a lot of wink and nudge at the audience. this show never takes itself too seriously, but that doesn't stop us from caring about the characters and the events they are put in.

like Watanabe's previous effort, Cowboy Bebop, the mood of the show is incredibly eclectic, one episode can contain moments of heart-wrenching drama and the next moment, pure hilarity.

as previously mentioned, this show is an amalgamation of Japanese storytelling and American hip-hop, the shows theme song is a strange but very cool rap by Emcee Fat Jon, and the show itself features many scratch-instances, usually used to shift the plot in another direction for a moment. hip-hop also reigns as a pacer for many of the extremely cool fight-scenes. Jin's rote and clean shogun style is a great counterpart for Mugen's wild Capoera and break dancing moves, and all the battles are bloody, excessive, and a riot to watch. even the little text blurbs and notes that constantly pass across the screen are written in graffiti and often include ironic slang messages.

the animation is reminiscent of Watanabe's work on Kill Bill, however it is less sketchy, more cleanly defined and colored.

if you're looking for another Eva clone, with a deep and continuous plot, then you're sh*t out of luck here, however if you just want a good time, that is immediately palatable and easy to get into, then look no further.
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9/10
A Dish Best Served Cold.
24 March 2006
Warning: Spoilers
hailed as "the thinking man's Kill Bill," the third and final chapter in master film maker Chan-Wook Park's epic revenge trilogy, which includes the brutal and thrilling Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance and the astoundingly moving Oldboy, is a fine ending to what Park reffers to as his "Revenge Trilogy." where Mr. Vengeance dealt with the futility of revenge, and Oldboy dealt with revenge as a spiritual experience, Lady Vengeance deals with revenge in a very different way, Lady vengeance is about the absolution of revenge.

gathering much of the cast from the first two films, Park weaves the story of a young woman who is sent to prison for murdering a young boy. of course she is framed for it, but she never admits this to the police. instead she lays in wait, deciding that her vengeance is best served personally, without the obstruction the law provides. during her time in jail, she is a model prisoner, helping and being kind, so much that she becomes known as "the kind-hearted witch." during this time she formulates a string of relationships with her fellow inmates, little do these friends know that they are simply pawns, but upon realization of that fact, they accept their place and are ready to help this woman with attaining her goal, for some it even becomes a personal mission of their own to see the wrong-doer brought to justice. upon release, the plan is set into action and we witness a kind of Kill-Bill "bloody satisfaction" romp as Kind Hearted Geum-Ja strives for her sweet vengeance. as is the usual with Park's films, there is a profoundly interesting twist ending, perhaps not as meaningful as Oldboy's, but certainly more straightforward and palatable to an audience who isn't aware of the films intent from the get-go.

the direction is top-notch, Park has opted to blend the very divergant styles he portrayed in Mr Vengeance and Oldboy, into a solid and beautiful looking presentation, much cleaner than his previous efforts, but with just as much blood dirt and gore. some of the comedic elements of the film work better than anything Park has attempted in his previous films, but just as many don't work. all the performances are fantastic, especially on the part of the now legendary Minsik Choi, who showed us all how it's done in Oldboy as the protagonist of that film: Dae Su.

some of the film is in English for plot reasons, and those scenes seem much less awkward than in most other films that blend language. if Park keeps this up he may just be offered to direct an English film, or an English adaptation of one of his own films, and that would be a sight to see.

all in all, i cant recommend this film more, it's easily the most light-hearted of the three revenge opera's, but that doesn't mean it isn't as heartfelt or human as Oldboy or Mr. Vengeance. the ironic thing is, that even though this is the last in the series, it's a good place to start, as it's the least experimental, and the most palatable to people who are unaware of the genre or style that Park dominates in his other ventures.
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Oldboy (2003)
10/10
Poetry in Motion
23 March 2006
one of the most up-and-coming film makers of the day is one Chanwook Park, an auteur from South Korea who just may go down in the history books as the 21st centuries first great storyteller.

Revenge. the word itself denotes a certain tingle on the back of your neck. we all know what it means, some of us have even been a part of it's tangled web. Vengeance is the culmination of almost every emotion the human mind is capable of understanding, and some we don't. Chanwook Park has written, directed and produced three film that tackle the psychology, philosophy and grand theme of vengeance, and Oldboy is the second installment and probably the most important.

the story is quite convoluted, and much of it should be left to be witnessed with virgin eyes and ears, but sufficing to say that a sully drunk named Oh Dae Su is captured by a man with a purple umbrella one rainy evening after a few hours in the drunk tank. he is kept in a small motel room with a fake window, a TV, an eerie painting and a gas pipe for the duration of 15 years. during this time, he witnesses his wife and child murdered on the 11 o'clock news, and he is framed for it. Dae Su sort of goes into a slow state of focused madness. his body becomes tough and trained, his hair becomes shaggy and beast-like, and his wrist becomes an hourglass, counting the years in checks until his release. When Dae Su is released, he is no longer Dae su, but something else, he's a beast, a monster, an unstoppable force of vengeance created by the rage and sorrow of the former Dae su. he still looks like the same disheveled 40-something, but there is a deadness to him, a crouching killer waiting to spring on his pray- the people who killed his family and put him in that horrible place, but with all the anger inside Dae Su, there still lurks a very human being, one so desperate for contact with another life after 15 years of deprivation, he consumes a living creature as his first meal upon release. this is only the first half hour of the film, and it's really the simplest part of the plot to explain- a precurser. this should give you an idea of how deep and dark this film plunges into the human psyche. for all it's cartoonish moments and stylish look and feel, Oldboy is unmatched in its well of emotion and deeply human story. you are not asked to take what you see as literal occurrence, but rather to accept what you see and draw meaning from it. there are some scenes many people find obligatory, consciously shocking or just plain gross, but they are all necessary in order to understand the epicness of this tale.

on a technical scale, Park has taken a complete divergance from his previous effort- Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance and instead gone into a kind of surrealist filmnoir-meets-hong-Kong wonder-world from which this fantastical story can be properly told in the grandios form it requires.

a lot of people disliked the ending to this movie, and if you watch this film the same way you watch something like Fight Club or Memento (both fine films) then you wont like it either, but this isn't fight club or memento, this is Shakespeare, this is Homer, this is what lies beneath the gloss and dirt. the core. the story itself is unimportant, it's what the story implies that makes it a masterpiece.

i mourn the idea of remaking this film, giving the helm to the man who'll do Fast and the Furious 3, and making the main character go to prison rather than the original mysterious hotel room. all the things that make Oldboy Oldboy are gone, and all we're left with is the homage of someone who obviously missed the point. so i urge you to see this version of the story before it becomes a bastardized memory of itself stuffed into a Pepsi advertisement.
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Neon Genesis Evangelion (1995–1996)
Every Young Man Should See This.
14 March 2006
with no budget and a skeleton crew, Gainex has created what just might me the most important story animation has ever seen. far surpassing masters like Hayao Myusaki, Walt Disney or Katsuhiro Otomo. for the first ten episodes, we are witness to pretty standard anime fair: a boy is selected to pilot a giant robot for the good of man-kind. the robots are grandios and colorful and the monsters are just as grandios and colorful, they show up one at a time to the same place- tokyo three and each one is more challenging than the last. meanwhile for the sake of ratings, there is a lot of fan service and lame Japanese humor. then we hit a wall: Episode 10. from this point on, we begin to understand the world of Neon Genesis. a distopian future inwhich man's mistakes have caught up with him, and his arrogance in the face of god has lead him to some pretty harsh conclusions. we begin to realize that if the world ever needs to be saved, the weapon we build to save it will have on inherent flaw: it was made and piloted by man, a fundimentally flawed being.

there's a lot of stuff in the series that the new testimate has omitted, and it ads a sort of depth to the events, gives them purpose and believiablity. but in the end those things are only sidebar for what the series is really about: humans.

like Otomo's classic Akira, the show begs the question, what would happen if a petulant child was given the power of god? but unlike Akira, the show not only delves into the idea, but also the protagonist himself. Shinji, Asuka and Rei (who's last names, Ikari, Langley Soryou and Ayanami are all real-life battleships) are each deep and disturbingly real characters. there is a well of catharsis to the tail end of the show, inwhich the three children chosen to pilot the Eva robots bond psychicly, and each must understand their own selves, as well as the selves that are perceived in the eyes of each other and those around them.

i was given the Evangelion series when i was 13 by my mentor. the show is a very real and very frank coming of age story, that i think all young men should see, what will intrigue them at first is undoubtedly the giant robots, the cool monsters and the hot chicks. but by the end of episode 26, they'll have bore witness to something that relates to all young men, deep in their subconscious- a story of self. and what it means to be self. what our true desire and true nature is, not just as a species, but as a being with a soul, a creature capable of both creation and destruction on both a physical and mental level, introvertiably and extrovertiably. there is a woven web that is our mind, from the people we know and their perception of us, which is always changing, and our true selves, which hesitates to change, but often must, in order to survive. the two selves.

i wish i could get into this more, but let me say- when you watch this show, if you are not a fan of the anime series genre, like myself, and find shows like Inuyasha, Slayers and so-forth banal and pretentious and dumb (which they are.) you will be immediately turned off by Eva. but bare with it. because every episode has a purpose which it needs time to lay down. and when the last Angel comes, and Shinji sinks into his own mind, it becomes clear what this story's intent is- to answer the age old question: what are we?
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Halo: Combat Evolved (2001 Video Game)
Die You Covenant Scum!!!
9 November 2005
Warning: Spoilers
HALO(XBOX) since 1995 Bungie has been working on Halo, a video game adapted from a failed movie script that bungie got the rights too. the game was originally developed as an RTS game but as time passed, it became a first person shooter, and thank god for that. Halo is the most emmersive gaming experience i've ever had, drawing you in with eye-catching visuals and sparatic, often desperate combat. Enemies are far from stupid, a pair of Hunters (large, tank like creatures that are notoriously hard to kill, think a Rhinoserous and Robocop had a baby.) can do a lot of damage, and work together as a team to squash you to bits.

You play Spartan 119 Master Chief, a cybernetic organism who's face is constantly hidden behind a gold visor and an olive green helmet. when the game begins your ship, The Piller of Autumn is being invaded by the covenant. the Covenant are a collection of alien races with a single goal, to eradicate the human race, before we become a threat. soon enough the Autumn crash lands on a mysterious ring world called Halo, which the covenant are inexplicably fascinated with.

the strategy of the game lies in the fact that all types of enemies react all kinds of ways, while grunts charge in lazy packs, Elites are smarter, faster and craftier, keeping their distance, Jackals are frustrating with their energy shields, and Hunters are juggernaughts who employ clever strategy to kill you fast, guarding their vulnerable spots with enormous arm shields. each weapon, covenant or otherwise, has its strengths and weaknesses, this adds another element of strategy, as you are only allowed to carry two weapons at a time.

the production quality of this game is something to behold indeed. for a video game the story is smart and well done, drawing you in and never letting go until the final scenes. cut scenes are fluid and well written. probably the greatest aethetic aspect to Halo is the musical score, haunting angelic choirs and exiting electric guitar riffs create a great atmosphere to match the beautiful scenery and hardcore gunplay action. and the x-box exlusive Cooperative function, allowing you and a friend to play through the game together, makes the game that much more enjoyabe.

occasionally you are forced to man a vehicle, an innovative and organic control system involving the x-boxes dual joy-sticks make this a treat, and in co-op, the warthog is a blast to ride, as one man steers and the other makes use of the machine gun on the back of the cab.

as the plot progresses new and more challenging enemies present themselves, and the game becomes something of a survival horror game, the aptly named Flood bombard you like a bad rash, never letting up.

like every good movie, this game ends with an exiting race against the clock. and i promise you will go back to the beginning and play it through a hundred times until you're ready to face the hordes of other players over X-Box Live.

i have nothing but good things to say about Halo, this game is the Citizen Kane of video games. a perfect experience that will remain in the hearts of gamers for generations to come as a classic of not only the first person shooter genre, but video gaming as a whole.
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8/10
Welcome To The Jungle
22 August 2005
i think it was the great author Hubert Selby Jr who said: "only when we are consumed in darkness do we see the light" Ichi the killer is a dark, strange and fascinating film especially if you are as entranced by cartoon violence as i, or Takashi Miike, the films twisted director are.

what we have here, is a simplistic story about a mob boss who runs off with 300 million dollars and a broad, both of which are killed by a man named Ichi.

meanwhile, the Coyote to Ichi's Roadrunner, a sadistic albino gangster named Kakihara goes on a hunt for his boss, the gangster who Ichi killed.

thats all there really is too it, most of the films story is for the sake of progressing its black, horrid sense of humor, the point is to sicken the audience, and entrance it all at once.

Ichi you see, is a superhero. a deadly killer who goes after the meanest of bullies, traumatized by a bad experience as a kid, he developed a penchant for killing those he was told deserved it, did i mention he has a rape fetish? yeah. he has a rape fetish.

Kakihara is a total villain, he revels in blood and violence, he has what the guys at the Red Versus Blue cartoon would refer to as "A Boner For Murder." he gets off on not only the pain of others, but his own pain, he is fascinated by pain in all its forms, especially the pain his master gave him- the gangster who ichi kills. this drives him passionately to find ichi and take out vengeance.

the remainder of the characters are really only important in the context of helping a Ichi and Kakihara move closer to their inevitable showdown, and thats fine, because the only two characters we are ever interested in are ichi and kakihara.

if you are in any way squeamish, stay away. Ichi is not shy about its depraved violence. Miike has some issues, his twisted vision of ultra-violence makes for some gross stuff even in its most delicate moments. this film would never make it to American theaters, even with an NC 17 rating. however, its severed, bloody tongue is firmly in its cheek, treating its disgusting gore the same way we would treat an anvil falling on the Coyote's head. perhaps thats a broad social statement, perhaps Miike is just too messed up in the head to know the difference between goofy getting hit on the head with a mallet, and a mans penis being severed with a pair of safety scissors, either way, this is a great film if you have the stomach for it. but if you don't, well then you're roger ebert and there is a Disney movie somewhere you could be watching right now.
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8/10
Requiem For Hunter S Thomson
21 August 2005
"in the most godless of years, nineteen hundred and seventy one," hunter S Thomson, a sports journalist, took a trip to Las Vegas, armed with a pistol, a Cadillac, and a cornucopia of hard drugs.

the memoirs of this strange journey became a best selling book, and now, a feature film.

Thomson is portrayed in perfect fashion by Johnny Depp. and his lawyer, doctor Gonzo, by the great Belicio DelToro.

The film, while plagued by problems, such as a third act that drags on like a dead body attached to a tricycle, is great in its own right. there are many classic moments in the film, that amalgamate into a deliciously confusing romp on 70's drug culture. the fast-paced, clever, and utterly none-sencical dialogue can only be understood to its fullest around the third viewing, so if your going to rent it, rent it when you've got the time to give it a couple viewings.

READ THE BOOK! when you've read the book, especially after you watch the movie, the film takes on a whole new light.

one of the hilarious points about the film is Thomsons insane, drug-fueled hallucinations, humping lizards, giant bats and fish-headed secretaries seek to give the film a strange, tripped out experience.

so give it a try, if you don't like it, you probably don't get it, and if you get it but don't like it, then you where probably made fun of in this movie.
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6/10
falls apart in the third act.
28 July 2005
though a beautiful film in the looks department, the story lacks something. the fight scenes, not unlike its sister film Hero, are stunning, inventive and well paced, as are the sets, costumes and special effects.

the acting is passable and its always a pleasure to see zhang ziyi's stunning beauty and talent.

the problem with this film is that it ends on such a bad note, at first, the twists are well timed and enhance the story greatly, able to leave you hanging but still interested. but towards the end of the film, more notably when we finally meet the flying daggers, the twists that made the first two acts charming, become too many too late. every three seconds there is some out-of-the-blue twist, meant to convolute the story, really only for the sake of convolution.

one of my favorite films of all time is Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, the plot, while convoluted is still deep and impeccably paced. it seems that zhang yimou, the talented director of this film and Hero, seems to want to recreate the majesty and beauty of crouching tiger, but focuses too much on making the plot as deep and convoluted, matching crouching tiger in those ways, instead of focusing on the story-telling and emotion that made crouching tiger great.

i give this film 6 out of ten, looks great, but falls apart trying too hard to be something it doesn't need to prove it is.
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Desperado (1995)
10/10
Revaluation of the Western,
22 June 2005
first off let me say that this is one of my favorite movies, now many people would assume that means i have no taste, and maybe i don't, but my other favorites range from Citizen Kane, La Doltcha Vita, M, Batman Begins, Requiem for a dream, Crouching tiger hidden dragon, Old Boy, Sin City, The Breakfast Club, Collateral and The Seven Samurai. just to give perspective.

now what i loved about desperado was its intricate simplicity. Rodriguez is a fantastic director, and all the actors in the film do they're jobs very well, this film is completely style over substance and knows it, but under all that style there's still a little substance here and there, if your willing to look for it. its sharply written, well told, and the action sequences are mind-blowing. without being hong Kong like, the action manages to be intricate and stylish, turning western- style gun-play into a sort of lead-spewing ballet, most notably in the bar fight. pretty much any flaws this movie has are either forgivable or work to enhance the film. its lighthearted, its fun, its cool as hell, and Selma Hiak is the sexiest woman alive. if you haven't seen El Mariachi, you don't need to have seen it in order to watch this film, but there is a DV D available with both films, you should check out, although personally i think the vintage feel of this film is best felt on VHS, i found my copy at a used book store for three bucks and could never consider buying it on DVD at least until my VHS copy becomes worn. now with El Mariachi, its best seen on DVD, its easier to find on that format and the special features include Rodriguez classic short film- Bedhead. the sequel, Once Upon a Time in Mexico is also best seen on DVD, as its visuals are absolutely stunning and are best seen in high definition. so in closing, see them, love them, and treasure them, because in an era of Micheal Baye, Jerry Bruchiemmer and Joel Shumaccer, its nice to remember when the American action film was something to be respected.
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10/10
Holy F**k...
19 March 2005
Dave Chappelle is brilliant, absolutely positively one of the funniest men in the world, i've always been a huge fan of Chappelle's show, as well as Dave's previous stand up career, and i was exited to see this one, and boy oh boy, i was not disappointed.

Dave talks about everything from Micheal jackson to guerilla hobo terrorists to simian fornication, my chest hurt for a good half hour from laughing so hard, and there is a surprising lack of racial content in this show, which is rare for chappelle and black comedians alike. Not since Richard Pryor's early years has there been a guy so physically and mentally humorous and challenging as dave, and i cant wait to see more of him in both his stand up career and his television sketch show.
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Saw (2004)
10/10
Wan Is The New Clive Barker
31 October 2004
genius, absolutely genius. Horror Fans will go nuts for this brilliant, wickedly dark thriller. Homage is paid to everything from Evil Dead II, to Todd Mcfarlenes Spawn, and obviously, to Seven. And that seems to be the biggest criticism of Saw, that its just a big rip off of Seven, well its not. while it focuses on a similar idea- a killer tries to make profane people see the light by torturing them mentally and physically- but these films are very different in there execution and story telling style. The other comparison to seven, is that both Saw and Seven have surprise endings... well let me tell you this....

Wow. while seven's ending is very good, and a nice twist, its not all that shocking... but Saw will keep you guessing until the very end, it'll make you think you've figured it out over and over, but then prove you wrong.. not until the last few shots is the surprise revealed, and its quite a doosy.

If your looking to get the poop scared out of you this Halloween, or if your a horror film buff looking for a new favorite, go see this flick.

Writer/director James Wan has the potential to be the next Clive Barker, he really knows his horror, almost never going for the cheap scares (thats when instead of working towards a moment of fright, a guy in a halloween costume with a knife pops out of nowhere and chases the double D blond.) and his horrific and yet sickly entertaining methods of death throughout Saw are absolutely inspired. so Kudos to James Wan, i cant wait to see whats next from this guy.
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