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Poppy Cat (2011– )
8/10
It's a preschool show that's...good?
4 August 2014
I didn't even think it was possible. But leave it to the studio that made "The Adventures of Spot" and the executive producer duo behind "The Mr. Men Show" and "Olivia" to prove me wrong. The visuals: they have this wonderful hand-made feel you don't see a lot anymore. The voice cast: It's pretty well-fitting, though the US dub is sorta blegh. The animation: silk-smooth. The stories: nice humor in places (as far as kids' shows go, anyway) and all sorts of creative potential...that's taken. The music: Sweet Jesus Mary and Joseph that theme song. It buries itself in a nice dark corner of your brain and refuses to let go no matter how hard you try to force it out. Bottom line: Forget what those Yale research people said about Barney, THIS is what preschool programming should be like. And why practically nobody even heard of this is beyond me.
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Teletubbies (1997–2001)
1/10
The worst thing I've ever seen in my life!!
4 August 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I'm not playing around here. This is absolutely AWFUL!!! This is about some aliens who are lost in some giant mini golf course. They wriggle, eat alien toast, and hug each other for all eternity to please their baby sun god. At least once every episode some pinwheel behind their hobbit hole projects clips of tots doing some boring thing onto the alien's TV screen stomachs. Also they have a blue alien robot elephant vacuum cleaner thing as their "pet-I-think." And holy heck is that thing terrifying!! And that's all you have to know about the show. Seriously. It's just unreasonable weird terrifying drug-induced crap. Who made this and what were they smoking?!!
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