Loaded with tropes and ludocrously stupid battle scenes in the tired Star Wars style of "stand in the open and shoot widely at stormtroopers" needlessly diminish this episode. Toss in the out-of-place shaky-cam closeups and you're left with an surprisingly underwhelming episode for what should have been an epic confrontation.
Reviews
20 Reviews
Blade Runner: Black Lotus
(2021–2022)
Lame animation and worse writing. Faubois only!
1 April 2022
Amateurish, off-putting animation that looks like video game cut sequences from 2008 strung together. The writing is pretty insulting, being overly heavy on fight scenes and spelling out every detail as if the audience is too stupid to grasp what is going on. Not sure why you would waste the effort to make this.
The Legend of Vox Machina
(2022– )
You'd think D&D fans would demand more
31 January 2022
Yes, it is crude and purile. BUT animation can be crude AND still be funny, if there is some intelligence to the writing. (Archer being a prime example.) Vox, however, is just... stupid. After three episodes, there is nothing remotely smart, clever or compelling. At best, there are brief glimpses of promise or the momentary alure of mystery that only heightens the inevitable disappointment. This seems like a (poorly-crafted) insult to the D&D community. A swing and a huge miss so far. (And on no planet does this pile of mediocrity warrant a 9 on IMDB.)
Arcane
(2021– )
Jaw-dropping beauty, dark but human
14 January 2022
Cinematic and visually-stunning. Characters that ate just as beautiful and engrossing as the visual artistry. Fantastic pacing and use of contrast. Can this really be based on a video game?!? Regardless, it is a must watch.
The Book of Boba Fett
(2021–2022)
More effective than Ambien
14 January 2022
This is great to watch before bed. It's bland, slow-moving and it is unburdened by clever dialog or writing in general. You can just turn your brain off and zone out. It even offers the occasional (unintended) laugh. With zo much over-stimulating entertainment that keeps you from going to bed, it is nice to have an option that lulls you into a coma-like-state.
Should be better. Hope it gets there.
7 January 2022
As satisfying as it should be for a Boba Fett fan to see how he escapes to form his new life, this telling is marred by poorly-choreographed/illogical fights scenes, moments of disapointing CGI and slow pacing. I'm rooting for the show to get better, but it isn't off to a great start.
The Wheel of Time
(2021– )
Pathetic teen melodrama... with magic
29 December 2021
The entire thing felt like a bad teen melodrama that mostly annoying or laughable dialog with a few fights and magical elements tossed in. The characters, with remarkably few exceptions, are intensely unlikeable and I found myself rooting against them early on. I kept hoping it would find its footing, but it never really does.
This was supposed to Amazon's Game of Thrones. It's a pretty poor alternative to even the (reviled) GoT series finale.
This was supposed to Amazon's Game of Thrones. It's a pretty poor alternative to even the (reviled) GoT series finale.
Pathetic, plodding melodrama with a magical backdrop
16 December 2021
Tried hard to get I to this, but the "writing" of this whole series is just plain poor. It's mostly comprised of slow, plodding, filler-laden drivel with stilted dialog delivered either devoid of emotion or grating, negative emotion (whiny, bitter, sniping, etc.). It's just all mind-numbingly tedious. It's like being surrounded by obnoxious teens that you want to slap to literal death before they have a chance to come-of-age. Sadly, the "adults" don't appear to have much more sense, only more baggage.
I foolishly thought the show might progress based on the False Dragon episode, where we got a sense of the source, some actual action (that wasn't just another tedious zombie/ork style horde attack done better in... Everything else) but we also got a glimpse into a few of the more interesting characters and the order of the AS and their relationships to their wards.
Then it was back to pointless drama. (n Now with 300% more political infighting! Hurray!) In essence, the guardians of magic and saviors of the world are so utterly consumed with their little color-coded sororities' power struggle, they are too busy to actually DO anything! And we are supposed sit there and watch it play out in slow motion! Enough! I'm out!
I feel sorry for the actors, Ms. Pike most of all. They (and the fans) deserve better.
Nynaeve had the best and most appropriate line of the series to date (paraphrased): "You must have pretty low standards". I echo that sentiment the writers of this tripe and anyone giving it glowing reviews.
I foolishly thought the show might progress based on the False Dragon episode, where we got a sense of the source, some actual action (that wasn't just another tedious zombie/ork style horde attack done better in... Everything else) but we also got a glimpse into a few of the more interesting characters and the order of the AS and their relationships to their wards.
Then it was back to pointless drama. (n Now with 300% more political infighting! Hurray!) In essence, the guardians of magic and saviors of the world are so utterly consumed with their little color-coded sororities' power struggle, they are too busy to actually DO anything! And we are supposed sit there and watch it play out in slow motion! Enough! I'm out!
I feel sorry for the actors, Ms. Pike most of all. They (and the fans) deserve better.
Nynaeve had the best and most appropriate line of the series to date (paraphrased): "You must have pretty low standards". I echo that sentiment the writers of this tripe and anyone giving it glowing reviews.
Mythic Quest
(2020– )
Alternates between really good and phenomenal
28 June 2021
The writing and characters are deceptively strong to the point that it took me until the. Incredible 5th episode to even look for the attention to detail. Not every episode has the same emotional impact, but there are a few that are so engaging and with stories so carefully crafted and loving told that the whole becomes so much more than the sum of its parts.
And while I have never been a huge IASIP fan, I feel like I need to revisit it, given the amazing writing of MQ.
And while I have never been a huge IASIP fan, I feel like I need to revisit it, given the amazing writing of MQ.
Collateral
(2018)
Confused, cinematography-glazed nonsense
22 April 2021
Wanted to like this. Love a cleverly-crafted mystery drama. The director was way too focused on framing, lighting and focus to direct the actors. Almost every conversation is awkward and unnatural. The side plots provide little value or relevance. The vast majority of characters are utterly unlikeable. The overuse of the selective focus and attempts at creative framing are tiring.
It strives to be artsy. I THINK they were trying to shine on light on the complexity of immigration as it relates to politics and policing, but the details are lost in the direction and production.
It strives to be artsy. I THINK they were trying to shine on light on the complexity of immigration as it relates to politics and policing, but the details are lost in the direction and production.
Spycraft
(2020–2022)
Bad narration, somewhat rambling
2 March 2021
This is OK, but it could have eaisly been at least an 8, which is a crime.
It suffers from an insufferable narrator who not only doesn't fit the show but also flubs a number of easy reads. Some episodes also seem to lose focus and meander, especially towards the end of episodes. It is as if the narrator they wanted quit and they changed the format of the series and ran out of interview clips to fill out the new structure.
Utopia
(I) (2013–2014)
Great concept, mediocre implementation
7 February 2021
I watched the US version and expected this version to be better based on its higher user ratings, but I was disappointed by the direction and weak performances/casting by the female leads. The premise could have yielded one of the greatest and most clever shows in a decade, but it misses the mark far too often to warrant the high user ratings it has received here.
I might be done with this series
21 September 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Had I intended to watch this kind of story, it might have gotten a 7. It's pretty cliche, the acting is fine and it had a few good moments. But it was an entire hour dedicated to a new character/Tic's backstory that spent an inordinate amount of time selling us on how much she loved Judy Garland and then having her transform into a bizarre creature that made almost no sense and didn't feel as if it fit into the Lovecraft style at all. (The creature or the atmosphere of the entire episode.)
For so much to be unresolved in the central plot of the show and to dedicate another hour of the precious 5 hours that remain this season to this side tale is what really annoyed me the most. Maybe it would have if I bought their romance, but the chemistry wasn't there.
What it DID do is make it abundantly clear that we're either not getting any sense of resolution to this season or it'll be slapdash and hurried at the end, leaving us to wonder whether we even want more.
For so much to be unresolved in the central plot of the show and to dedicate another hour of the precious 5 hours that remain this season to this side tale is what really annoyed me the most. Maybe it would have if I bought their romance, but the chemistry wasn't there.
What it DID do is make it abundantly clear that we're either not getting any sense of resolution to this season or it'll be slapdash and hurried at the end, leaving us to wonder whether we even want more.
Pick up the pacing!
15 September 2020
The director needs to get his act together and fix the pacing of the show. Every scene is drawn out as if its supposed to add a sense of drama and tension, but when everything is dramatically slow, nothing stands out. There is never a sense of normalcy to ground the viewer, just constant, slow-moving and largely-ineffective attempts to build tension upon tension upon tension.
Acting is good and premise has promise, which is the only reason I'm giving it an all too generous 5/10, despite disliking the direction so intensely.
Acting is good and premise has promise, which is the only reason I'm giving it an all too generous 5/10, despite disliking the direction so intensely.
Disappointing in many ways
14 September 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Cinematography and acting earn it a 4, everything else was painful or seemingly pointless.
The vast majority of the time in this episode was spent (or wasted as many of feel) on delving deeper into the characters of Ruby and Montrose. It felt like it was all secondary storylines and pointless "revelations". Ruby reveals that she is just as ugly on the inside and when given the freedom as she pleases, goes ape with murderous rage. In a single episode, she went from being a rather annoying, preachy but principled character to being irredeemably awful.
Montrose is revealed to be a closeted gay man when seeks comfort in the arms (and more) of his gay, drag-queen lover, ultimately feeling free and alive during a drag show at a gay club. O...K. While I certainly welcome any chance for an actor who's work to have some meat scenes to flex, this just felt out of place and unrelated to the rest of the story. Still not entirely sure what the point of this is and I found myself more bored than anything.
And then we have the "reveal" that the two freakish albinos are one and the same person, which I had strongly suspected since the last season and which became apparent with the hastily tacked on talk of the two of them coming in and out of the locked basement door and Christina's many hints. By the time it was revealed, my only reaction was "Obviously...". (Not even warranting an exclamation point)
Then there was the seemingly random, tacked on bit at the end with Tic's murderous fling in Korea, which appears to be the setup for the next episode.
The only bone, pardon the pun, they threw fans to keep those put off by these storylines was an extra love scene and nudity that didn't really further the story, IMO.
The vast majority of the time in this episode was spent (or wasted as many of feel) on delving deeper into the characters of Ruby and Montrose. It felt like it was all secondary storylines and pointless "revelations". Ruby reveals that she is just as ugly on the inside and when given the freedom as she pleases, goes ape with murderous rage. In a single episode, she went from being a rather annoying, preachy but principled character to being irredeemably awful.
Montrose is revealed to be a closeted gay man when seeks comfort in the arms (and more) of his gay, drag-queen lover, ultimately feeling free and alive during a drag show at a gay club. O...K. While I certainly welcome any chance for an actor who's work to have some meat scenes to flex, this just felt out of place and unrelated to the rest of the story. Still not entirely sure what the point of this is and I found myself more bored than anything.
And then we have the "reveal" that the two freakish albinos are one and the same person, which I had strongly suspected since the last season and which became apparent with the hastily tacked on talk of the two of them coming in and out of the locked basement door and Christina's many hints. By the time it was revealed, my only reaction was "Obviously...". (Not even warranting an exclamation point)
Then there was the seemingly random, tacked on bit at the end with Tic's murderous fling in Korea, which appears to be the setup for the next episode.
The only bone, pardon the pun, they threw fans to keep those put off by these storylines was an extra love scene and nudity that didn't really further the story, IMO.
Space Force
(2020–2022)
So much wasted talent...
9 August 2020
It isn't worth a big write-up, so I'll just sum it up by saying that the entire season yielded a half dozen laughs (if I'm being generous) and hundreds of groans of frustration and anguish. Worst elements: (mostly writing) the daughter, f Tony, Russian spy guy, doofus soldier, the joint chiefs (the most wasted talent of all) and the repetitious plot line of doofus leader proves he's not worthless/irredeemable. The only positives were Dr. Mallory (although still poorly written), Dr. Chen and the too infrequent digs at the current administration.)
But my favorite aspect of the show 8s that they grabbed the trademark for Space Force before our ill-prepared government did., showing how poorly conceived the actual Space Force founding was.
But my favorite aspect of the show 8s that they grabbed the trademark for Space Force before our ill-prepared government did., showing how poorly conceived the actual Space Force founding was.
Hurried to the point of being nonsensical
5 July 2020
Avenue 5
(2020–2022)
Poor Hugh...
16 March 2020
As a fan of Hugh Laurie, this show made me sad. The formula, the over-the-top characters, half the cast... it all just misfires. Hugh is as good as one can be in this wreck of a vehicle, but the show is farcical and tiresome from pilot to finale. I kept watching to see if it got better or at least grew on me, but the premise just got thinner and more ridiculous. So sad for Hugh. An HBO show, probably a big budget and this is the result.
The Lion King
(2019)
Pretty but pretty awful
28 July 2019
Pros: Visuals, Timon, Scar and Zazoo
Cons: Bland retelling, poor casting of leads, Seth Rogan, loaded with cringy & overproduced song remakes, mindless adherence to original scenes thst clashes horribly with attempted at visual realism.
In short, this is just plain awful. I went with my family and another and all 6 of us hated it so much that we had more fun riffing on the film than we did watching it.
Cons: Bland retelling, poor casting of leads, Seth Rogan, loaded with cringy & overproduced song remakes, mindless adherence to original scenes thst clashes horribly with attempted at visual realism.
In short, this is just plain awful. I went with my family and another and all 6 of us hated it so much that we had more fun riffing on the film than we did watching it.
The Jungle Book
(2016)
Somewhat pretty but pretty mindless and silly
25 April 2016
I went into this with pretty high hopes based on the trailer and the reviews. I was really disappointed.This had all the hallmarks of a high-budget, nostalgic cash-grab with Disney window dressing.
I was ready to suspend disbelief (they're talking animals, after all), but I wasn't ready to completely disengage my brain. I was even willing to accept that Disney has a history of playing fast and loose with the facts in animal movies (like convincing millions of people that lemmings will willingly leap to their deaths), but I wasn't ready for the rampant and senseless disregard for nature and common sense.
The plot was, at times, completely absurd. (The last 30 minutes or so, for example) And was it really necessary for half of the animals to be 3-10 times their normal size? (Ignoring Louie, which, well, words fail me...) The quality of the computer animation was also inconsistent, ranging from brilliant to awkward.
The performances are what really killed it for me. When you have the level of talent that they assembled for this film, you expect great things. What you got instead was flat, uninspired performance from VERY talented people and a few non-so-talented performances (most notably Mowgli)
Before the film, Favreau gives a little speech to tell everyone about all the imagination and hard work that went into making this film. Sadly, it needed a great deal more.
If you are looking for a really good children's movie, go see "Zootopia" instead.
I was ready to suspend disbelief (they're talking animals, after all), but I wasn't ready to completely disengage my brain. I was even willing to accept that Disney has a history of playing fast and loose with the facts in animal movies (like convincing millions of people that lemmings will willingly leap to their deaths), but I wasn't ready for the rampant and senseless disregard for nature and common sense.
The plot was, at times, completely absurd. (The last 30 minutes or so, for example) And was it really necessary for half of the animals to be 3-10 times their normal size? (Ignoring Louie, which, well, words fail me...) The quality of the computer animation was also inconsistent, ranging from brilliant to awkward.
The performances are what really killed it for me. When you have the level of talent that they assembled for this film, you expect great things. What you got instead was flat, uninspired performance from VERY talented people and a few non-so-talented performances (most notably Mowgli)
Before the film, Favreau gives a little speech to tell everyone about all the imagination and hard work that went into making this film. Sadly, it needed a great deal more.
If you are looking for a really good children's movie, go see "Zootopia" instead.
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