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Reviews
Court Jesters (2005)
The greatest movie in the history of mankind
We had Saving Private Ryan's opening beach scene. We had Hurt Locker's slow motion IED scenes. We had Margot Robbie nude in Wolf of Wall Street. They are all about to become bull and void. In Martin Scorsese's directorial debut, we follow teenagers playing the greatest sport of all time- shooting each other with frozen paint.
Many people never return from the battlefield . You can take the soldier out of the war. But you can't take the war out of the soldier. In this epic tale of friendship, relationships, war, trauma, PTSD, politic, corruption of the masses and the meaning of life itself.
After my first viewing of this masterpiece I was in disbelief and struggled with alcohol dependency after being unable to grasp the eye opening experience set upon me from this film.
Be wary, this film is not for children. Cold blooded murder is around every corner, and just like in real life, no one is safe from the war inside us all.
The Strangers: Prey at Night (2018)
The worst movie I've seen since Jack And Jill
This is arguably the worst horror movie I've ever seen. I've seen hundreds of movies and this one I considered walking out of. I've walked out of only one other movie. The only reason I didn't was because my friend was with me and he didn't want to.
Characters are THE dumbest characters I've ever seen. The acting is horrendous. The directing, dialogue, lighting, cinematography, pacing, scares are terrible.
There was one good scare and that's the one in the playground. There was only one good scene in the entire movie. That was the pool scene, mainly because it actually has color and tension and it feels close to being rescued from drowning in the Atlantic Ocean. It was a breath of fresh air.
Other than that I'm considering suicide.
Don't waste your time.
300: Rise of an Empire (2014)
More blood, more action, more gore, more nudity. Less Memorable
Not as good as the first one. The CGI is amazing again but there a few memorable shots of landscapes or angles like the first one had. Every shot of the first 300 could be a screen saver or background, this didn't have as many memorable beautiful shots. The blood looks really fake, the pacing is a bit cramped with too much action, very few emotionally connecting scenes, the soundtrack wasn't memorable at all, few likable characters, few memorable characters, Xerxes pushed to the side and given a clichéd origin story, the ending was anti-climactic, they could have ended it after the finale, but no they had to leave a cliffhanger for the third one, supporting characters suck and aren't half as memorable as the first one, and Eva Green isn't completely naked. It is a fun movie to see with friends, but that's about it. I forgot almost everything that happened the next day. Check it out.