Reviews

This film came out during a time when 3-D made a brief comeback in the early 1980's. The same day after his massacre in Part 2 Jason once again finds his woods invaded by a bunch of dope-smoking, horny teenagers and they once again ignore the warnings of townsfolk. The teens set up shot in a vacation farm owned by the family of one of the teens, Chris. After upsetting some bikers in town earlier, the teens continue partying until Jason crashes it and murders them one by one, while Chris and her man Rick are away. One of Jason's victims, Shelly, provides him with his now-trademark, iconic hockey goalie's mask. When Chris and Rick return, Rick is killed and Chris battles Jason with the brief assistance of one of the bikers from town who came to the farm to get revenge on the teens who upset him earlier. But Jason, like he did to the other two bikers, kills him and Chris, in turn, kills Jason. And like the dream sequence in Part 1, Chris goes insane when she dreams someone has jumped from the lake and brings her underwater. This time, it's not Jason, but a decomposed Pamela Voorhees, with head reattached!

Two months after surviving the massacre at Camp Crystal Lake, Alice returns to face her fears, but instead, ends up getting killed when she discovers the head of Mrs. Voorhees in her refrigerator. Five years later, a new breed of campers set up shop next to the shut-down camp. After unheeding warnings about the camp again, the killer, who is revealed to be the not-so-dead, fully grown Jason Voorhees, makes his way through a variety of sexually active campers and cops until he goes against a steely counselor who tricks him into believing that she is his mother (via wearing his mother's bloody sweater). After defeating Jason, Ginny and Paul, the only;y survivors, find a cabin and rest for a second, until Jason crashes through a window and attacks. The next day, Paul has disappeared and a barely alive Ginny calls to him. The movie ends with a shot of Pamela Voorhees' decomposing head

After the drowning of a young camper in 1957 and the murders of two counselors a year later, Camp Crystal Lake has been closed for over two decades. Local Crystal Lake investor Steve Christy has invested $25, 000 dollars to reopen the camp in order to prove the camp (nicknamed "Camp Blood" by the old timers) isn't jinxed like people think it is. But on the fateful day of Friday, June 13, 1980, the curse becomes true when Christy and his young, nubile teenage counselors are systematically murdered one by one until only one remains. When an elderly old woman, PAmela Voorhees (Betsy Palmer) reveals herself as the mother of Jason, the boy who drowned and the killer, Alice (Adrienne King), the only counselor left alive battles Pamela in a life or death fight by the lake. Alice triumphs when she decapitates Pamela with a sharp machete. Alice awakens in the hospital after dreaming that Jason pulled her under the lake with him in the canoe and is informed by the cops that they never found a boy in the lake, leaving Alice to believe that Jason is still alive somewhere in Crystal Lake.

Two young lovers are sitting in the back of a car making out and starts to make love until the girl starts to talk about the legend of "the Hook" When there is scarping on the car roof, the boy named Don (played by the always-dead Russell Todd) goes to investigate. The girl starts to get worried about her boyfriend and goes to investigate. She then gets the shock of her life seeing Don hanging upside down from a tree with his throat slit (the same way Todd's character dies in Friday THE 13th PART 2)" and starts running for life. The movie then pulls back to reveal that the girl's situation is a "movie within a movie". Two young female friends, Ruthie (Robin Lamont) and Marie (Robin Tilghman) are watching the movie. Marie suddenly announces "I can't take this anymore!" and heads to the bathroom. Once in the stall using the bathroom, Marie calms down somewhat until she hears strange noises and starts to get spooked. She asks "Is somebody there?". No reply. She hurries up using the bathroom and quickly sneaks out of the bathroom. After nearly rolling over another patron, Marie speeds back into the theater and reclaims her seat next to Ruthie, who demands to know where she had been and that the movie was getting good. She meekly replies that someone is following her. Marie then asks her friend to leave the movie with her. But Ruthie silences her and tells her to stop being paranoid. As she watches the movie, the fear of Marie's face is evident. A man in black named Ray (Tom Rolfing) sits in the seat directly behind her. Marie begins to cover her mouth in horror at the movie she is being forced to watch. Taking advantage of the situation as the movie begins to builds to a crescendo, Ray pulls out a knife and jams it through the seat into Marie, who suddenly screams with shock. While others in the theater are screaming at the movie, Marie is screaming as well-but not at the film. It's actually at the fact that she realizes quickly that she is being murdered. Ray quickly leaves as Marie's body, frozen in terrifying fear, slumps onto Ruthie, who tells her friend that they could leave now. After looking at her for a moment, Ruthie tries to pull Marie up and feels wetness from Marie's back. She takes her hand and notices blood on it. Ruthie then screams in horror as the credits roll.

The rest of the movie is quite predictable. Ray is stalking brides-to-be (like Marie was revealed to be)and killing them as retribution to the fact that he was stood up at the altar by his fiancée, whom he kills as she prepares to marry another man. The detective assigned to the case is Len Gamble (Lewis Arlt), the fiancée that was murdered by Ray some time earlier. Gamble quickly starts to look after a group of girls about to get married, particularly Amy Jensen (Caitlin O'Heaney), whose fiancée Phil and the girls' other fiancées head off to a wild bachelor party. Amy and her two friends Nancy (Elizabeth Kemp)and Joyce (Patsy Pease)are stalked and picked off one by one as the killer makes his way through them until only Amy remains. The rest of the film takes place at the morgue where Amy's ex-boyfriend Marvin (Don Scardino), still hopelessly in love with her works. Gamble quickly tracks Amy and Ray down there. The rest you'll have to watch for yourself. The ending is quite shocking. This is also the film where Tom Hanks makes his debut as a boring psych student named Elliot (relax, he lives!). The movie theater opening was redone-quite well-in SCREAM 2! A great movie to watch on a lonely, rainy night in the dark-by yourself!

Like HOUSE would become 6 years after the release of this movie, MOTEL HELL is a hilarious example of what is supposed to be a straightforward horror film that is actually something of a comedic gem.

Rory Calhoun, a famed Western star, plays probably the most kindly, likable and human mass murderer in his portrayal of Farmer Vincent Smith. Vincent, along with his grossly overweight younger sister Ida (the delightfully wacky Nancy Parsons)run the Motel Hello (the "O" is burning out of the sign, giving the film it's name)in a quiet country area of central California. Vincent is also famous in the county for his line of smoked meats (free jerky is offered to unsuspecting hotel guests)that he has been producing for over 30 years. The secret is the way he "cures" his meats: by using human flesh! One night, an old biker and his girlfriend Terry (Nina Axelrod) are riding along the road when they crash on a spike and hit a tree (in a trap set up by Vincent). When Vincent checks on his victims, he notices that the girl is still alive, but bruised. He takes the girl home and lets her recuperate at the motel, much to Ida's disgust. The old biker's throat is slashed (Vincent cuts his victims' vocal cords out so they can't scream)and is planted in a garden of other victims (which include a county inspector, a rock band with a groupie, two young "ski bunnies", and a couple who are into freaky sex and bondage), who will be seasoned so they in turn can "spice up" Vincent's meats.

Over time, Terry falls in love with the kindly old Vincent, who is smitten as well. Of course, objecting to this idea of marriage is Ida (who tried to drown her in a lake while they were out tubing) and inept, bumbling Sheriff Bruce Smith (Paul Linke), Vincent and Ida's kid brother who went out on a date with Terry and attempted to rape her.

Bruce slowly, but surely, discovers what his siblings are into and tries to warn Terry, who has already discovered what Vincent and Ida are up to and is subsequently tied up to become chopped up after Vincent tries to justify his killing people by claiming to be helping out God by solving the population and hunger problems of the world. Terry's old biker boyfriend is mysteriously revived and uproots the other victims, who are coming to as well. They all ambush an unsuspecting Ida while the biker battles Vincent to the death. Vincent chokes the biker and is about to do the same thing to Terry when Bruce shows up.

He is met by Vincent with a chainsaw and is masked in a pig's head. After a gruesome battle, Bruce slams his chainsaw into Vincent's side and runs off to get Terry. After a moment of hesitation, they start to realize their true feelings for one another and start to kiss when the chainsaw goes off. They run to investigate and sees Vincent trying to take the chainsaw out of his side. after it is turned off, with Terry by his side, Bruce listens to a final heartfelt speech by a dying Vincent, in which he claims to be the biggest hypocrite of them all by admitting to using preservatives in his meats. And like that, he dies, leaving his brother momentarily saddened.

After discovering Ida planted in the garden by her victims, Bruce and Terry leave the motel as he laments to how he grew up there. Terry tries to offer the suggestion of burning the place down and claims that Motel Hello "is an evil motel". The O in the in "Hello" explodes, leaving only HELL still illuminated

It's a hilarious movie. Watch it sometime.

Only a few times in cinema can there ever be a few franchises/trilogies that have the third film be better than the first two (STAR WARS, BACK TO THE FUTURE, SCREAM, LORD OF THE RINGS, THE MATRIX) and many times where sequels become the third film becomes the bane of the trilogy/franchise (FRIDAY THE 13th, NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, HALLOWEEN, AMITYVILLE, EXORCIST, HELLRAISER,THE GODFATHER-Part 3 sucked and you know it!). The second-and possibly final-sequel in the BLADE franchise, in my opinion, was better than the first two. First off, Blade had to grow beyond the tutelage and wisdom of his mentor/best friend/father figure Whistler, which necessitated his death. Next off, Blade had evolved into a leader, which necessitated him leading the Nightstalkers. Thirdly, what better plot point than Blade having to face off against the "father of all vampires", Dracula, whom if you look at it, was indirectly responsible for the death of Blade's mother by starting the vampire race. And fourth, in films, you sometimes need comedy to offset all of the drama, horror, and or violence. This was displayed excellently by the casting of Ryan Reynolds, who played the wiseass former vampire-turned-slayer Hannibal King. I was one of the many people in the theatre cracking up at his one-liners ("The dog's dick was bigger than yours!") and his off-the-wall insults ("You cock-juggling thundercunt!"). I also must have been one of the few people who noticed the underlying sexual tension and banter between King and his former lover Talos. And lastly, did I mention that Blade whooped everybody's ass worse in this film with even more mind-boggling, gravity defying stunts? I give this film a 9 out of ten stars.

FALCON CREST, like DALLAS and DYNASTY, was a popular prime-time soap with attitude. Premiering in 1981, the show follows the conflict between the Channing and Gioberti families over the Falcon Crest vineyard located in the Napa Valley region of San Francisco. Angela Channing (Jane Wyman) ruled Falcon Crest with an iron fist. Her nephew Chase Gioberti (Robert Foxworth) demanded a bigger piece of the profits for Falcon Crest wine that his father Jason, Angela's brother, left him. This set the stage for 9 years of fiery battles and even hotter sexcapades. Characters included Lance Cumson (Lorenzo Lamas), Angela's playboy grandson, his one-time scheming wife Melissa Agretti (Ana Alicia), Cole Gioberti (William R. Moses), Chase's son who fathered Melissa's baby, Richard Channing (David Selby), Angela's co-arch-enemy who was later revealed to be the son she thought dead 45 years earlier, and of course, Chase's beloved wife Maggie (Susan Sullivan), who would marry Richard and become Angela's daughter-in-law when Chase drowned trying to save a life. I stopped watching after Maggie was killed off. I think a lot of people did for they really loved her and rooted for her.